Wooooooooooow

I found this blog not via writer's block but instead by a group. That group is WOMEN GAMERS.
DON'T HIT ON ME SILLY BOYS.
Also it's that typical thing where you have to agree you're 14 to even get into the blog and then that you're 14 to read each entry. Gentlemen, we are in flavor country.
Her post on GRRRRRRRL GAMERS went a little something like this:

A couple of years ago I got a DS and along with my typical Mario/Zelda/Pokemon choices I thought I should pick up Harvest Moon DS since I loved the Game Boy games!

Big mistake. I HATED it. Haaaaate. There are so many things to do,

>hate this game
>too much to do
What the fuck?

what with dating, mining, finding the Harvest Sprites...not to mention, you know, farming.

I FEEL LIKE I'M LITERALLY RUNNING A FARM.
Here's a revolutionary idea: how about you budget your time?
Get mad cash mining, then all the bitches will crowd to you because you have mad muscles and money.
Easy.

I now have a Wii, and I see that there are also more games for the DS. So I'm wondering if anyone else has played any of these games and has any recommendations, based on my opinion of the first DS game? I really would like to see a newer game in the series that I enjoy playing.

Get Etrian Odyssey III and get mauled by a giant sabertooth tiger you dumb cunt.

I've got a serious case of the winter break/end of the year/missing boyfriend blues. It just hit me this past hour like a ton of bricks.

But you got vidya gayms.
Starting to feel blue?
WHAT'S UP, PS-TRIPLE?

I want to go curl up and cry for no reason at all, and I'm pretty sure I'm not hormonal. It's too dark and cold in this house. I need someone who is not my parents to come here and cheer me up. I need a snuggle like nobody's business.

Well it is true you can't snuggle up to COLD STEEL that you are encased in in Etrian Odyssey III but at least you have hard-fought victories against the enemies of man and the encroaching wilderness.

I still have a whole week here. :[

It is a story I have seen played out dozens of times but I never tire of: enter with nothing but a knife and your wits and EMERGE HAVING TAMED THE WILDERNESS. TRULY YOU ARE NO MAN'S SLAVE NOW.

HEYYY CHRISTMAS was cool.

All I asked for was a Wii (specifically the red one, because I'd been wanting a Wii for a while and then they came out with the red one and I was like DUDE GET ME THAT ONE), which I got. Her name is Ginger.

That's interesting. I named my computer Grimaldus.

BUT she also got me FIVE POUNDS OF WOOL for spinning. FIVE POUNDS.

:V
If only you were in FFXIV. I'd have a deal for you.
Of course like all deals I make in FFXIV the only person who benefits is ultimately me, but such is life.

I'm really excited to get back though. I miss my friends, I miss having a room with doors. I miss Pokemon and Doctor Who all day every day.

ALL DAY ERREDAY
Come, let us battle. Everything I need to know about a person can be discerned by the way they battle Pokemon.

It's summer!
- Working for my mother, supposed to be doing 20hrs/week but it's more like 9 because i'm lazy!
- knitting things
- spinning yarns

Ah yes, the top down monopoly I've grown so fond of in FFXIV. Who needs these idiots when I can make and repair all my own equipment?
No more am I slave to the capricious whims of the market wards.
Unless I need buffalo hide in which case I am.
But otherwise in-house production.

- thinking a lot about girls
- thinking a lot about boys

HEH HEH HEH.

- raising my pokemanz, trying to beat the pokemon league champion

YOU ARE WEAK.
Here's her book collection. Lots of animu.
She is right. It is indeed colorful.
UNFORTUNATELY COLOR DOES NOT SPELL TASTE.
And there's you. About as expected.

So I saw Harry Potter, and I kind of almost wish I hadn't.

It's not that I'm not angry that it sucked (which it did), it's that I'm angry but don't really care otherwise.

WELCOME TO BEING AN ADULT. HARRY POTTER DOESN'T MATTER.
Or, alternatively:
WELCOME TO BEING AN ADULT. ANGRY BUT NOT REALLY CARING ABOUT IT AT THE SAME TIME.

I'm going to buy the Sailor Moon manga in Japanese. No, I cannot read Japanese.

Welp.

One day I WILL be able to read Japanese. This isn't just a silly dream of a 10-year-old anymore, I'm actually going to study it in college.

Is that right?
You seem like one of the ones that didn't cut it in Japanese 101.
You know, when it turns out learning a language is a lot of work and not very "kawaii uguu ^____^" at all.

Got my UNC rooming assignment!

>UNC
Welp.
Might be able to battle Pokemons face-to-face, even.

Listening to your male classmates read aloud to each other the heavily pornographic stories they have written about each other is a very interesting way to spend lunch.

Excuse me?

I knew there was a "act gay to be ironic and cool" thing going on in the heterosexual male community, but this is very very strange to me.

Is that right?
Well being a heterosexual male with mostly heterosexual male friends I can say we've never once done this.
I can't even recall a time where someone even suggested it, be a joke or seriously. I'm pretty sure this is the first time I'm hearing of this phenomenon, in fact.
Maybe we're weird.

I finished a yummy skein of yarn this morning that is 128ish yards and is gooooorgeous I just want to drink it up.

>yummy skein of yarn
nope.
You know, "Oddacity", I wasn't hating you as much as I normally hate bloggers but I think I can manage now.

I have a drop spindle, and a spinning wheel that needs some repair.

You've come to the right place, then. For a price I can repair anything you're wearing.
Oh wait, no, sorry. Forgot this wasn't FFXIV.
Sorry I decided to play FFXIV instead of listening to some bint prattle on.
Hit fatigue on leatherworker again so ALL ABOUT SPLITTING WIND CRYSTALS YO.
When it resets tomorrow I'll be fucking ready, man.

Zzz

So there's this thing called "National Novel Writing Month" or, comfortably, NaNoWriMo. I'm dead fucking serious. That's the acronym they've chosen. Rolls right off the tongue.
This is a clearly misguided practice for a number of reasons not the least of which we'll highlight in today's blog.
Also: today's writer's block.

How would you describe the last decade in one sentence?

A lot of people didn't follow the directions carefully and chose to answer in one word instead of one sentence but I guess they can't be blamed for working smart. Or maybe they're just idiots. Anyway my summary: "it was pretty mediocre."

Computers and the Internet have changed the way we live and do business.

As opposed to the 90s where we had no internet.
A lot of people also whined that the decade ends on a 9 (errrr) to which I have to say:
THERE WAS NO YEAR 0 YOU FUCKING MORONS A DECADE ENDS ON A 1.

This month we read Eragon by Christopher Paolini, who was only fifteen when he wrote the book.

I'm sorry.
What, have you read every other book ever written?

Eragon is a fairly straightforward fantasy adventure novel with a few original twists. Given the young age of the author, this is fairly impressive.

"Fairly straightforward" now translates to "fairly impressive" I guess.
I guess it is fairly impressive considering the 15 year olds I work with can barely work a pencil, let alone write a coherent thought.

I'm sitting here on the last day of being 36, looking outside at threatening gray skies. I'm supposed to be coming up with plans for my extended birthday weekend, but forecasts of freezing rain make me want to hide in my apartment instead.

36 years old reading Eragon. Isn't there a point where you develop taste? I guess not.
Isn't there a point where you decide fanfiction really is kind of daft and juvenile?

I finished reading Eragon for my book club today, but I'm not completely sure what to say about it. I've got a paperback copy of it released around the time of the execrable movie, and the book has eight color pages of "exciting" stills from said misbegotten production.

And I know Eragon isn't technically fanfiction (it is though. Lord of the Rings fanfiction set in an alternate reality) but I'm pretty sure anyone who would seriously write a book club review of Eragon probably thinks fanfiction is interesting and fun to read.

I wonder how the raven-haired elven beauty with pointed ears became a blonde girl with perfectly-rounded ears,

Those Elven girls though. All hipster bitches.
High fantasy hipster bitches, but hipster bitches nonetheless.
One of my retainers in FFXIV is an Elf (or no, my mistake: ELEZEN. THANKS SE) and she somehow manages to be haughty and pretentious despite the fact I own her.
I OWN YOU HOW CAN YOU BE THIS ABOVE IT ALL?
Oh yeah, FFXIV: the game where you're a noble, erstwhile adventurer and yet you can own two people.
I know they're technically "retainers" (which were historically soldiers and not shopkeeps but what the fuck ever, SE) but I have yet to pay their wages and the fees I incur on any sales they make are explicitly "taxes" and not "wages" so the impression I get is they're unpaid retainers who must listen to my orders.
Also there is kind of a slavery ring to retainer despite being paid but they were part of a larger system entitled "bastard feudalism" that describes the political and social structures in the late Medieval period. I don't know about you but when I think "bastard feudalism" the word "freedom" doesn't immediately spring to mind.

I just got through dealing with a very obscure question for my favorite problem patron, which I had to answer with a lot of fruitless searching, one "a-ha" moment, and a bit of reasonable conjecture. He seemed to like the answer, so hopefully it's the right one ^_^;;

Let's not even bother explaining what we're talking about.
Let's go back to the story I just told. Notice how I begin "in FFXIV" so it sets the context so people can know what the fuck I was talking about?
Imagine if I set it up like this bint. "Just got told telling my Elven slave to sell some goddamn cloth."
I'D LOOK FUCKING CRAZY.
Well I probably already do but whatever. Crazier.
And here she's declared "NaNoWriMo" winner because she wrote an entire book that is 51,000 words.
Doesn't matter how good the words are or if they even form a coherent narrative, sheer word count is what makes you a winner.
Dante and Homer would be proud of this fine literary tradition, I'm sure.
"Yeah you know all that technique and shit you guys worked so hard to maintain? Doesn't matter. Just muscle through 50k words and you win."
Also the concept of "winning at writing" is pretty perplexing to me. I know of a lot of people who got published and yet fell into complete obscurity within their own lifetime. Are they winners?
History doesn't really pick the winners based on any real criteria you can determine within your own life. For every writer who stands the test of time like Dante or Homer there are thousands upon thousands of Elizabeth Stoddards (although my own point falls apart under any scrutiny because Dante and Homer wrote awesome shit and Elizabeth Stoddard wrote some fuck) but you get my point.

According to the NaNoWriMo website, OpenOffice's word count algorithm may be inflating word counts. This means that my 50,421-word total may actually be less than 50,000.

OH WELL EXCUSE ME! IF I ONLY HAVE 45,000 WORDS I AM NOT A WINNER, NO MATTER HOW GOOD THEY MAY BE.
Hey J.D. Salinger? Sorry bro, Catcher in the Rye only weighs in at about 47,000 words. Get that fuck out of here you hack.
George Orwell? 1984 is only about 49,000 words. Sorry man. You can't be a good writer.
Oh and don't even get me started about Farenheit 451. Ray Bradbury you fucking hack. 41,000 words is all you could do? That's, what, only 82% as good as 50,000 words.

Apparently it has something to do with how it interprets "smart quotes" and other punctuation separated by spaces.

Wow I must be a shitty writer. I've been at this for years and I don't even know what the fuck a smart quote is. Is that when Open Office goes fucking apeshit and adds a ton of unnecessary spaces to my dialog?
Also I don't know what "other punctuation" means because I only use periods and commas, pretty much. Also dashes. Big fan o' dashes.

As I've been doing ellipses in the preferred method (space-dot-space-dot-space-dot-space), this could have added a considerable number of words to my total.

I just went through three stories I wrote (not 50,000 words so they're garbage but that's not my point) and the ellipsis never even appears. I am a bad writer.
I guess by this logic Leo Tolstoy is about the greatest writer ever because War and Peace is an epic spanning several thousand pages.
But it tells the story of several characters with no real connection between them except they might be related to other characters and they all kind of lived at the same time-- I'm not sure you can even count it as one story. It's kind of like the Bible. It's a lot of stories with a recurring motif or connection.
Does that count as one book?
I'm not sure.

Then again, my 2008 novel was typed in OpenOffice and the final word count wound up being higher than OpenOffice estimated......

I'll find out at midnight when the NaNo word count validator goes live......

EDIT: I found an independent word count page here which informed me that my total was a rather less-stunning 46,647 words, or about an 8% overcount.

INDEPENDENT WORD COUNTER.
I just wanna get done, really. I don't care about the quality of what I write.

As of tonight, my 2010 NaNoWriMo novel Flame of Justice: Elemental War is finished!

Flame of Justice: Elemental War.
You might as well call it "flame of cliche: cliche cliche".
Seriously what the fuck am I even looking at? Can I read this masterpiece of 46,647 words?

It weighs in at 50,421 words, and flows a lot better than my 2008 effort to which it is a sequel.

Lost a couple thousand in a day. Guess that was some strict editing.

(That book is currently undergoing heavy revision, so for those of you who've read it it's going to be much improved!) My villain has been almost-irrevocably eliminated, but he does have a "Get Out of Limbo Free" card should I choose to bring him back.

"Eliminated", meaning you cut an entire character just like that?
I mean it does happen all the time but wow. Usually that happens when you rewrite, not when you edit.

As of right now, I'm at just under 47,300 words on this year's NaNoWriMo effort, and have just finished the Climactic Final Battle with Yamigumo, my antagonist.

Yamigumo.
Onigumo sounds more sinister to me.
Or if you weren't an illiterate fuck and you were doing some kind of animu pastiche the most obvious name for you villain would be "Oniwakamaru" because that was a popular name for a menacing, demonic figure in Ukiyo-e works.
You know, based on the historical figure Saito Benkei?
Died standing?
Fuck.

That leaves me 2700 words or so for escaping his Evil Lair and wrapping things up satisfactorily.

The obvious question in my mind would be "what if you need more than that?" I hope it just ends mid-sentence.
Also maybe I don't understand how this whole writing thing works but I'm pretty sure when your heroes face off against the villain "Yamigumo" in some sort of JRPG-esque final battle at the end (hopefully with Dancing Mad or some other Final Fantasy classic playing) only to escape his crumbling layer you've fucked up in ways I can't even begin to imagine.
I don't know I just have books I've read and stories I've written to go off of but going off my last three things I've written the villains have been, in order:
nothing
a political entity
nothing
You can get conflict from things other than super villains, you know.

Given that somewhere in there I have a conversation or two, I think I should make my word count even without the eerily-foreshadowing epilogue ^_-

And in one of my stories the protagonist isn't even named. Maybe this kind of shit and fanfiction is good and I'm just wrong.

What can be done to promote tolerance and stop bullying in schools?

You cannot stop bullying. It has always, ALWAYS been around.

Stop treating kids like they're going to break if you even touch them, and bring back corporal punishment.

Smart. Hit the maladjusted kid.

The greatest impediment to writing a novel is being distracted by reading someone else's.

Is being a fucking hack more obsessed with word count than quality.

While I should have been preparing for NaNoWriMo, I instead spent some time the past couple of weeks completing a set of character sprites in the style of the Super Famicom/Super Nintendo Final Fantasy IV/Final Fantasy II

See what I mean when I say you just told Final Fantasy in book form and fucked it up?

It's obviously not a standard MMO, given its all-ages rating and its emphasis on building and problem-solving rather than killing enemies.

PROBLEM SOLVING INSTEAD OF KILLING?
I'M OUT.

My new computer is doing very well, for the most part, and now that I have a new monitor capable of taking advantage of its capabilities I'm quite happy with it. Except for one small problem.

It has a habit of unexpectedly bluescreening when I try doing something graphically intensive.

Gee I wonder if your graphic card/chip/whatever is overheating.
Fuck.
Anyway I'm bored of this.
Leves reset in 3 hours and I BETTER GET SOME MORE BUFFALO HIDE AND GIGANTOAD SKIN THIS TIME.

AT LAST

At last, a good writer's block question!

What's the best new game of 2010?

Well let's see.
FFXIV came out in September and as much as I'm enjoying that it frequently tempers the fun bits with frustration or just slow grindy bullshit, so I think that's out of the running. Maybe next year it can win, but then it's not new.
Red Dead Redemption also came out this year but if you think that's GotY material you're 16.
I mean, have you chucklefucks ever seen a Western before?
Call of Duty: Black Ops came out in November but the campaign is all of five hours long and as good as it is the main draw of the game, the "deep" multiplayer experience boils down to getting called a faggot by a bunch of homophobic 13 year olds.
The most obvious choice for game of the year 2010 is Monster Hunter Tri.
No bullshit, no fucking around with nonsense, no idiot 13 year olds screaming at you, just you and a giant fire breathing dragon. A Wii game is the best of 2010. TRULY WE LIVE IN THE END TIMES.
Anyway today we have a girl gamer with a misinformed opinion.
Her top 5 2010 includes such award winners as:
Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep (what)
Final Fantasy XIII
The Sims 3
LEGO Harry Potter
and
The Sims 3: Ambitions (game and expansion in the same year. Class act, EA)

I'm between Final Fantasy 13 and Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep as my #1.

I've been playing Final Fantasy since 1995 and in my 15 years of playing Final Fantasy I've completed pretty much every entry in the series.
I still have yet to get more than 20 hours into XIII.
I beat arguably the worst entry in the series (before XIII), VIII, twice. So I'm pretty much a dedicated fan and when I call your game shit you're in trouble.

I actually haven't finished either one of them . ^///^;

SEE EVEN FANS OF THE GAME CAN'T BRING THEMSELVES TO FINISH IT.

That makes this even harder. I love Final Fantasy 13, and it was a much bigger game than Birth By Sleep, but... Kingdom Hearts is probably my superior gaming love.

>Final Fantasy XIII
>bigger
Have you ever played a video game before? I guess by "bigger" you mean "takes a long time to finish" then sure but I can tell you right the fuck now that world is just a series of narrow passages leading you to the next melodramatic bit of whining.
In fact, here's a challenge to all both of you reading this: go back and find all the times I've mentioned Final Fantasy XIII (upward of 10 times now I'm sure) and see how many times the words "melodramatic" and "whining" appear. I bet it's 8+ times, if only because I'm sure I mentioned it before it came out in America.
It's a bad sign when the only character you relate to in your entire cast you relate to simply because she hates the idiots she's traveling with as much as you do.

And it really helped me get through my cold. I spent most days playing it at least a bit. Tea and Kingdom Hearts was my cold therapy.

It's pretty close, though. <3

Girl gamers. "I LOVE IT BECAUSE IT'S LOVE SQUEE <3"

Things are going pretty well. Finally. I got some writing done over the weekend. Nothing too major, but it was enough to feel I had broken out of the cold's grasp.

Wow a girl who plays Final Fantasy fancies herself a writer.
I bet she reads and writes fanfiction and is a furry. Also fat. She might also play World of Warcraft, I dunno.
Maybe watches anime. But nothing good like Fist of the North Star or Berserk, just some fuck like Inuyasha.

I'm feeling very inspired in preproduction, too. I'm so excited about a couple of ideas right now, but they are so far down the line of what I'm currently writing that it is kind of funny.

So I discovered a magic land in FFXIV filled with nothing but hippocerfs and wolves. Or, as I call the two enemies, "hippogryph sinew and buffalo hide factories". Yeah because when wolves kill buffalo they eat the hides. Thanks a lot, SE.

I don't think I'll ever run out of story ideas. If I ever got close, I guess I'd just throw some characters into The Sims 2 and see what happened!
And speaking of sims! (Well, honestly, that was an artificial segue. And you know, I had to look up how to spell that!

I'm a writer but I only learn how to write from video games so I've never actually seen many words in print because the only games I play were made when voice acting was common.

If you fall in love with a book or movie, do you tend to watch/read it again and again? If so, what's your upper limit on repeats?

This question always perplexes me. "Upper limit"? I REALLY ENJOY THE ODYSSEY BUT I ABSOLUTELY WILL NOT EXCEED 20 READS.
Incidentally I have massive swathes of both The Odyssey and Dante's Inferno memorized.

Also, though the question is just talking about books and movies, I've played Kingdom Hearts probably 4 full times, many other partial times. I've played Final Fantasy X twice.

I know it makes me a huge faggot but Final Fantasy X was pretty good. It gets a lot of bad press mostly because of two embarrassingly bad scenes, but the game was actually pretty decent. It tried something a little different and succeeded.

Still sick. *Sighs* It's certainly not the worst cold I've had in my life, but I still don't really feel like doing anything. I spent most of yesterday listening to podcasts and playing games on Neopets and Facebook.

Oh, Neopets.
Remember Neopets?
Man I feel so 2002 all of a sudden.

I will say that the Harry Potter fic I'd been reading helped a lot for last week's writing.

So we have fanfic references and anime references already, and Neopets pretty much seals the furry deal-- am I missing any of my AMAZING PSYCHIC PREDICTIONS?
World of Warcraft. Also she just had an Inuyasha avatar. I know it seems like I know so much about this bint I must have read ahead but I assure you these people aren't different enough from each other for me to not guess this accurately. It's like guessing how a day will go by saying "well the sun will rise and then it'll get high in the sky then it'll go down" and being amazed when you're right.

And yep, more games. I've been playing some Lego Harry Potter which is super fun! And I even started playing a bit of Final Fantasy V. Yes, five. It's actually pretty fun for such an old game.

:|
EWWW THIS GAME HAS 16 BIT GRAPHICS IT'S SO OLD.
CERTAINLY NOT AS GOOD AS WHINING MELODRAMA IN XIII.

I think I've reached the point of being tired of WoW.

YES THANK YOU.
Man I am awesome. I was kind of worried about that prediction, honestly, because with as much kawaii weeaboo bullshit she might think WoW is icky because it's American, but the alternative is she's playing FFXI or XIV and that shit ain't happening, let's face it.
I guess she could be one of ten people still playing Aion, but yeah, if she's playing an MMO at all it's WoW.
I'm purposefully leaving the bit where she says she only lasted a month out.

Anyways, I'll just get onto it. I hate Windows 7.

Welp.
This is what I'll never understand about my nerd brethren: they want a gamer girl. Why? No, bro, you want a normal girl with normal interests who will put up with your nerd bullshit because the alternate is this.

Anyways, last night, Symphony was talking about Dissidia: Final Fantasy (a fighting game with Final Fantasy characters in it), and how it would be better with more characters in it.

Well it's the main character and the main villain from each game (except it's Kuja instead of Necron from IX OHHH SPOILERS) so I guess there are as many characters as there are games x 2, really.
Although for some reason they decided on Shantoto in XI. I guess that game has no main character since it's an MMO and Shantoto has the most interesting personality but I dunno.

She was saying there should at least be two playable protagonists and antagonists from each game.

Well in I you could have...
Uhh. Hero and another, slightly different hero then-- I guess Garland and one of the elemental fiends?
No, 1 each is pretty much all you'd want.

For instance, they have Tidus from Final Fantasy X , when she believed that Yuna was just as much of a main character.

Actually she's pretty much the focus of the entire story even though it's supposedly Tidus' story.

And then, it hit me. Final Fantasy X really is Yuna's story. It's Yuna's story through Tidus' eyes.

NO.
Fuck.
I know I just said I liked FFX but Tidus and Yuna are pretty much the two worst characters they could have picked for the main characters. Auron and Lulu would have been the obvious main male and female duo in my opinion, but really fuck Tidus and Yuna.

I've been out of school for 5 years now. March 29th 2005 was the last day I went to school.

Oh we graduated the same year. Except I have become even more awesome in that time and what have you done? Languished in bullshit, I suspect.
Wait, you don't graduate in March--

I promise I won't go into any spoiler-y details, but I'm totally in love with FF13. I got it at midnight and played for about 5 hours.

Yeah I got it during midnight madness too and I was even silly enough to think "man I have class early tomorrow. I hope I'll be able to go to bed on time!" I found an excuse to go to bed early that day.

Everything is so beautiful, and I already love the characters.

Say again?

So, this was kind of crazy. Then I saw the first game's price. $90. $90 for a DS game! (Just checking now has shown me that it's now over $100...)

Ho-hum.
I got a fucking sweet new DS for Christmas, speaking of, and now I need to upgrade my Acekard because apparently Nintendo doesn't want me to enjoy Homebrew on my DS.
Of course I'd never do something illegal with an Acekard.

Okay, this is the second Final Fantasy 13 trailer to make me cry. At least, I can understand this one. Goodness, I'm excited.

>crying during a trailer for Final Fantasy
Oooooh, goodness.

anytime I think of playing Final Fantasy 8, I decide not to. It isn't because I didn't like what I played of it...

Yes it is. Be honest.

Pretty much if you know anything about me, it's that I'm a writer. Or it should be, anyways.

ANYWAYS IS NOT A WORD ANYWAYS IS NOT A WORD ANYWAYS IS NOT A WORD HOW CAN YOU BE A WRITER AND NOT KNOW A SIMPLE WORD LIKE "ANYWAY" HAS NO 'S' ON THE END OF IT?

So, if you are interested in my writing

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I think I hate Religion.

My Uncle thinks I'm defective. Since he's Religious, he was preaching to me. About all the things that are "wrong". And I held back.

Fascinating.

Then my Uncle went on to say how American culture has turned away from God, which has lead to homosexuality and even INTER-RACIAL relationships... Okay, what the Hell!?

Hey, the Lord Jesus didn't die on a cross for you to marry someone who looks like you.
It even says that in the Bible. Straight out of Deuteronomy (Deuteronomy is out of the Old Testament).

And tomorrow, I take the GED.

What have you been doing for 5 years?
Anyway.
Or, no, excuse me: anywayS.

Yes, lazy people who aren't clicking the link. Final Fantasy 13, my only reason thus far for wanting a PS3, is now coming to the Xbox360.

Oh what's up, game of the year 2009?
Well I think that's it for this entry. So many questions I have yet remaining, like:
Why did she drop out of high school?
Why does she have such shit taste in video games and, well, everything?
Who in their right mind can enjoy FFXIII?
Why, how, why?
But knowing blogging like I do I'll never find the answer to these burning questions.
Particularly the first question I'd like to know. I mean fuck, aside from the "ANYWAYS" thing her grammar is better than 99% of the idiots I deal with, so what gives?
Well I bothered to go back that far to see and the short of it is her blog skips from 2002 to 2006, and she dropped out in 2005.
FUUUUCK.
Anyway entry over. No closure here, assholes.

COWARDICE

There is nothing worse than a mealymouthed worm whining about what an injustice his life has been because the world doesn't acknowledge his genius. You may not remember Cary Lee Babcock because indeed he is forgettable, but needless to say I never forget.
This guy is like 15 levels of pathetic. If "pathetic" were a job in FFXIV he'd have hit fatigue by now.

Thinking, sinking deeper into my writing. Choking on the depressing thoughts my mind likes to come up with.

OH WAAAAAH DEPRESSING THOUGHTS CHOKING ON MY WRITING MY WRISTS BLEED TEARS OF RED ;_;

As of right now, I have been reading all about Edgar Allan Poe. His story inspires me, to a degree, to not care whether I make a living on my writing. It is all about my writing making a living on me.

Oh wow.

Too busy to write, too busy sleep. I don't like it, just like most people wouldn't like being pulled away from their desired fillers of time.

That's the simile you're going with?
I'm going to write a simile like his now:
I don't like this blog the same way I don't like anything written by douchebags.

I can still feel the lived in space of my room. It is my room at college that I miss and feel secure in. Though I know it is all an illusion. A wondersome illusion.

MY LIFE! O YE MORTAL COIL!

The most important things to talk about are my career updates.

>The most important
>implying any of this is important

The first is my Senior BFA Reading, which took place on December 14th, 2010. It was a very chilly evening and I had eaten all my meals alone that day.

FOR I HAVE NO FRIENDS FOR WHO COULD BE FRIENDS WITH A TORTURED GENIUS SUCH AS I?

I had been a nervous wreck, fearing the performance I would give. When all the suspense built horridly up, I found myself a delirous laughter box. Then the lights in the Landing went dim. And Gretchen Legler began talking about the reading, and then she started reading my introduction...
She incorrectly read that I grew up in "Midford," New Jersey. It was Milford...

SHE INCORRECTLY PRONOUNCED THE GREAT POET OF OUR GENERATION'S HOMETOWN! WHAT KNAVERY!

There was applause, but I could not hear it over my heart.

I sat in a sad pile on the couch and I listened to the rest of the readers from my class. They were wonderful. I did not deserve to be with them.

FOOLISH FOOL, WHAT MAN DESERVETH TO READ WITH HIS KINDRED?

I did not deserve the flower they gave me. And so I pitied myself, gauntingly even as people tried cheering me up. Then the awards came, and I had forgotten there would be such an occashion.

>occashion
That pleases me greatly for some reason.
THE GREAT GENIUS, UNSURE OF HOW TO SPELL OCCASION? I THINK NOT!

I had been feeling better, but all I needed was to be told I wasn't worth an award and my writing would suffer greatly in my insecurities.

All great writers go unappreciated in their life time, man.
Ha, ha, ha just kidding.

When you know there is a difference, forget the ties and slurp the whys. Ignore the horrid voices, become the mystery inside.

Woooooooow.

Break the norm, because you are better than all the other people they fall for. You are the magic marker they use to write.

You are the magic marker they use to write-- what?
This is the writing you want acknowledgment for? This is what you think is so great?

As the Cary wants to retire to bed, the writer wants to come out and play.
As the journal is lightly touched by ink, the keyboard feels lonely.

"The" Cary. You just graduated 20 ranks of douchebag right there.

Now, I really don't know if the hat is from the fifties or not, as I have mixed opinions. But I like the damn thing since it suits me and I don't see them everywhere I look (besides in movies).

He's talking about a fedora which let me tell you buddy you are not the first smug hipster cunt to think the fedora is awesomely in fashion again.

I just thought I would share my sense of wonder with the love I have for another things I have wanted for a long time and have finally come to possess. These would include my authentic windup pocketwatch, my zippo lighter from Viet Nam War, my briefcase, my woodpipe, and probably some other things I don't get to use quite as often.

This guy is getting so many cool points.
What else does he need to graduate and become a full hipster?
Actually I think that's it. He has the full ensemble. He has the full set of artifact armor for "pretentious hipster cunt"

Sometimes emotions control my writing too deeply, I think too harshly and I haven't been thinking about how public this journal is, when it is the most public of things.

Yeah don't want any conviction in your voice on this fabulous journal everyone is reading.
Just a ton of "WOE IS ME" tortured poet bullshit.

The way my venting works is difficult to understand, and it cannot be accounted for as the truth of what is completely reality, because anger, fear, love, passion, and so on makes us all say things that satisfy our need to rid ourselves these emotions.

What-- oh I get it.
GREAT AUTHOR.

I deleted the last entry because the of the immense emotional dellusions it went on.

Delusion*

I can't say she is my ex, I can't say she can't stand me, I can't say I don't know love, and so much more.

I can't say she can't stand me-- so she can stand you?

Let me explain how I really think things are, even though I think I have talked about this in earlier entries:

Yes, I need some exposition on this exposition.

I can't say she is my ex, I just find this may be an important way for me to look at it to improve the situation for her and my mental health. We weren't working so well around a year ago, through my sensitivities and her responsibilities.

Whoever decides to date you must have a martyr complex or the patience of several saints.

They were not a good mix, let's say. But overall we are very good together, perfect really. But with these clashing attributes we needed to put some space between each other for the time being and the attraction could still pull us together from time again.

>perfect together
>clashing attributes
Let's go over this briefly, shall we? You're not the only one to do this, Cary Lee Babcock.
When you say shit like "the controls were a little floaty and the plot didn't make a lot of sense and the difficulty was a little inconsistent" and then you turn around and give the game a 10/10 it's like saying "it had some flaws but ignoring those it was perfect in every way."
Also let's disregard all euphemism, what you're saying is "when we weren't having bitter arguments we were perfect" which is the same as saying "we weren't perfect" because, indeed, who is?
Except for you, of course, Cary Lee Babcock. The great author.

We talked so many times and it comes down to the one significant action I must take, no matter how much I don't want to.

All my life has been leading up to this single point.
All the fire, all the piss and vinegar coursing through my veins has brought me to this lone moment.
Today personal safety is naught. Today Giacomo di Patzi will die.

I need to get over her. But I struggle with the idea of getting over someone if I may one day be with them again.

Oh right. Sorry.
I forgot we have a strict "no interest" clause in this blog.

SO this is where I stand trying to find a way to limit or eliminate all the problems in the friendship between she and I.

She and I
You and I
Why Don't You & I?

So far my best thought is to limit the time I spend with her, no matter how much I want to be around her I need to get over her so that when I am with her there is no thought of wanting to be with her, wanting love, and so forth.

Every time I try to talk to you
I get tongue-tied, turns out
everything I say to you
Comes out wrong and never comes out right

These things should be secondary.

So I'll say why don't you and I--
I literally do this so when I go back and reread it I'll just mouth the word "fuck" to myself and look whatever song I just typed into Youtube.

I've taken the time to walk the line and see into the lives around me.

I keep my eyes wide open all the time.
Yeah that's right, motherfucker: this is going to be a tough entry to reread.

I need to take the time to actually start writing a lot more poems and stuff again.

I know what song I need to work into this entry somehow.

Take the idea of understanding our life-perspectives change so gradually we don't see it until years and years down the road. Potheads at the young age of 12 through even early 20s may not see their mind state being any different yet because they haven't looked into it, until they smoke the weed and see that things are ever going through the process of change.

No, I don't think--

I don't know where it came from. Maybe it crawled out of the dunkin donuts clear plastic cup used primarily for coolatta's these days. Or maybe it slipped into my ears from the audio of the videos I watched on youtube today. Or it might have been the air I took in walking by the cemetery today.

The miasma at the cemetery, Christ dude. No, this isn't working. I need a reference to going fast or a car or something--

Maybe the feeling of the girls in their car laughing at me sitting on a bench alone.

Foreveralone.jpg
eeeeeh close enough.
ONE FOOT ON THE BREAK AND ONE ON THE GAS, HEY!

Though I really don't know for sure.

WELL THERE'S TOO MUCH TRAFFIC I CAN'T PASS, NO!

The feeling of vigor is back and pumping through my veins.

So I tried my best illegal move
A big black and white come and crushed my groove again!

Though, I am sorry to admit I must waste the feeling at work, washing all the dishes all on my own until the night is over and all I can hope is it isn't a long, busy night.

Go on and write me up for 125
Post my face, wanted dead or alive
Take my license n' all that jive
I can't drive FIIIIIIIIIIFTY FAAAAAAAAAHV! Oh No! Uh!
Okay I have to stop that now this entry is going to take 45 minutes to reread.
Right, what am I supposed to be doing? It kind of turned into shoehorning as many songs into my entry as possible.

I'm on my bed after waking up and I can't stop feeling the emotions of my dreams.

This reminds me of another song actually (genuinely this time) but fortunately most of the lyrics are in JAPANESE (I UNDERSTAND JAPANESE BAKA GAIJIN) and I'm not typing it.

If you ever thought life was simple, you were wrong. Don't even try contradicting me!

LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHF IS AAAAAS SIIIIIIMPLE AS YOUUUUUUU MAKE IIIIIIIIT YEAH (writing songs like Bruce Springsteen).
Well I think that's it. I managed to shoehorn at least 4 song lyrics into my post and conclusively proven Cary Lee Babcock is a sniveling twit.
Have fun rereading this at a later date, me!

CUNTINESS

I bet all three of you reading this thought "hey, we're up to day six with no mention of that Meanest Mom cunt," well you impatient twat today is your lucky day.
I know I've spoken at large (this is the fifth entry on the subject) but the most recent entry was this one.
I rather enjoy my opening to this post:

Like a dog returning to its vomit, I find myself returning to the subject of THE MEANEST MOM (ALL CAPS POWERS ACTIVATE!)

It's like it's written to compel you to read further or something.
How do I do it?
Well enough of tooting my own horn, let's begin.

This morning I went to the post office to mail a couple last minute gifts. Everything went fine, except for the fact that somehow I managed to get my dad's Christmas gift stuck in the mail bin.

Recurring theme in this blog: she does something stupid and expects the world to fix it for her.
TYPICAL WOMAN AM I RIGHT GUYS?
Wow that was really uncalled for, even by my usual standards.

After waiting in a ridiculously long line, I notified the woman at the front counter of my predicament. She told me that what happened to me "happens all the time" and that someone would "try" to get the package out later that afternoon.

Ha, ha wow you're getting trolled hardcore.

"If another customer doesn't figure out a way to get to it first," she told me with a hysterical laugh.

Wow not only is she not going to do anything she doesn't even give a fuck if your shitty package gets stolen. I'd give this woman a high five.

I have something very special to give away this week!!!!!

It is incredibly awesome and something that every family would love to have in their home for the holiday season.

I'm not going to tell you what it is (surprises are rad),

A gun.

but I will give you two clues:

Oh I love these kind of games. I'm always spot on.

1. It's a gift that keeps on giving. I got it on Friday night, in the middle of Ikea, and still have it!!!!!

A deep dicking.

2. You won't be able to keep it to yourself! This gift is not for the stingy. No matter how hard you try to keep it all to yourself, it will be nearly impossible not to share it with somebody.

Definitely a deep dicking.
Also stop getting on my shit about my spelling, Firefox. Dicking is so a word.

I love a good giveaway and this one is, I'm sure you'll all agree, pretty awesome!!!!

I bet it's a cold, eh heh heh heh I like my suggestion better.

Last week, the family who lives across the street got a dog.

Today, a man came and installed an invisible fence around their yard. The concept is genius: every time the dog crosses the line, it gets a little bit electrocuted.

Radio waves, actually.

This weekend, my husband and I took our older kids on a short cruise to the Bahamas. We specifically left Cameron at home so we could do some fun activities together as a family.

Yeah fuck you Cameron. Too young to remember shit anyway.
I do enjoy the implication that Cameron was left home alone at the ripe old age of 3 or whatever he is now.

I shouldn't have bothered.

All my kids wanted to do the whole time was watch television in their cabin.

Amazingly cruises aren't too interesting to 10 year olds.

"We didn't come here to watch T.V.," I told them. "Let's go check out the buffet or something."

Lesson of the day: staying home saves money and all the fun activities are already there.

My husband ticked off the options on his fingers. "How about ping pong?" he asked. "Or shuffleboard or basketball? At 3 o'clock, we can learn how to fold towels into the shape of animals."

I came 2000 miles to play basketball?
Dad, have you ever heard of a playground?
Or, no, my mistake: shuffleboard. What year is this? How old are you people?

On Saturday night, I went to the grocery store. Before I left the house, I asked if anyone wanted to go with me.

No. No one wants to be near you. Away with ye.

My husband and Cortlen ignored me (they were watching a football game). Camber came into the room with a brush, a bottle of hair spray, and two packages of glittery hair clips.

"I would go, but I have things to do," she explained

I understand. I, too, am often busy.

I didn't really want to take Kellen because he looked like a homeless person, but by the time I found my keys, he was already in the car.

The drive to the grocery store took exactly three minutes...plenty of time, I learned, to have a conversation about just everything in the entire planet.

Or everything worth talking about, anyway.
Also I like how she doesn't want to take the one kid because he looks homeless but isn't that kind of the responsibility of the parents to, I dunno, raise their kids or something? Is this kid living in such Spartan conditions that he can look homeless?

Kellen: "Do you know what? I wouldn't go walking in the woods right now. You wouldn't be able to see a panther because it's so dark. Isn't that crazy?"

Yes, the wild panthers of Florida.

Me: "Why are we talking about panthers?"

Panthers are fucking rad is why. The kid's right. They blend into the night, then they melt out of the shadows and maul you to death. A day in the life of an average panther is 100 times more awesome than your entire existence, woman.

Kellen: "Do you know what? If a rabid dog bites you, you have to get three shots in your arm that are as thick as peanut butter. Did you know that?"

And back in the day it was 20 shots in the gut. Be glad you were born when you were.

The scene: an overpriced department store

The purpose for our visit: to purchase a $100 group gift card for a relative who just had a baby

Ah fuck I just got disconnected from my game in the middle of splitting a wind crystal. Well there's 1 crystal down the drain.
And now it thinks I'm still logged in. Oh, right. What are you taking about that's of no significance?

After paying for the item, I put the card in my purse. My kids were quiet until we got outside. And then they let me have it.

"You paid $100 for that?" Camber screeched. "That's a total rip-off!"

Oh Christ who even cares?

Camber spends her money the instant that she gets it, usually on things that I abhor.

"It would be great if you didn't buy that tub full of tiny beads," I told her as she plopped the object into my shopping cart this afternoon.

This is where guidance and parenting come in I understand.
Or you could not crush the life out of your children, I dunno.
It really is your fault for having so many.

One of my greatest joys in life is picking up thousands of microscope beads off the floor...one by one.

Oh what's it like living in the fucking stone age? I was about to say "you know a vacuum would expedite the process" but come to think of it so would a fucking broom and dust pan.

"Christmas is coming soon," I begged. "Maybe Santa will get it for you."

Yeah nice try your kids are like 10. Way too old to fall for shit like that.

My kids aren't the smartest kids in the universe, but they have enough brain cells to know that the Santa that comes to their house doesn't love them as much as the Santa that comes to their friends' houses.

WHY WOULD YOU HAVE CHILDREN IF THIS IS WHAT YOU THINK OF THEM?
What, there weren't enough people in the world to experience your cuntiness you had to produce four of your own to show?
And it really took you a long time to realize that maybe you shouldn't have had any at all. I understand two are twins (which is knowing more about your life than any stranger should know) but even then that means you gave this pregnancy and childbearing, not to mention raising thing four goes.

"Santa would never buy me something like that because hates us," my daughter told me. "All he buys me are books and toys without batteries."

WELL PSYCHE OUT MOTHERFUCKERS THIS YEAR WE'RE GETTING A PS-TRIPLE.

Since ascending into adulthood, I have been a member of 17 book clubs. Or so it feels.

Ascending.
The Temple of the Emperor Ascendant is all I can think of for some reason.
That's where Reclusiarch Grimaldus had his last stand at Hellsreach, wasn't it?
Oh thanks for letting me back into FFXIV, SE. Only took you 13 fucking minutes.
All right bitch, back to your alembic. We got wind shards to make.

Unlike most other social events, I find book clubs to be thoroughly enjoyable. On all but two occasions, I have read the assigned book and then neglected to show up for the meeting to discuss it.

I would be the worst at book clubs. I'd just tell the entire club what we should read, call their selections stupid and then do what I wanted anyway.

"You don't like book clubs," my husband corrected. "You like reading lists."

Last week, I joined my eighteenth book club. The first meeting was in a conference room at the public library. The book club leader began the meeting by asking each of us to make a list of things that we like to read about.

I want to read Hellsreach again. The best Warhammer book ever.
Actually Legion is better by a slim margin.

I didn't know what to write first, so I put down "infectious diseases."

I have to give credit where credit is due: that sounds like something I would suggest.

"Like the Swine Flu?" the woman asked when she got to my paper.

"And HIV and Cholera and the Black Death," I added.

Fuck yeah.

All of the other lists in the room included mythical creatures.

HURRR TWILIGHT.
Let's read The Faerie Queene instead. MOTHERFUCKIN' SAINT GEORGE KILLS THE FUCK OUT OF A DRAGON.
Then lands some sweet Elven pussy, man that guy was a baller.
Yeah it sounds like the gayest thing ever written. The Fairy Queen, really?
But it's just hiding the most awesome thing ever written, practically.
It's like that movie Troy. It stars Brad Pitt as Achilles and you think "wow, Brad Pitt as a Greek. This is going to be homoerotic" and the first thing I see when I turn it on is Achilles throwing a spear through a guy's shield and through his fucking head.
Awesome.

All this week, my kids have been making drafts of Christmas lists. On Sunday, the final lists are due. Today we held a peer review.

Uh-huh. Why?
I can't even get 9th graders to do this activity correctly. How are you going to get 10 year olds to do it?

When Cortlen saw who was going to review his list, he started to cry. Camber cackled and rubbed her hands together in anticipation and excitement.

Just some good ol'-fashioned sadism I guess.

"Now I want you to circle three things on the list that you think the author would like the most," I told them.

I had no idea where this exercise was going or what purpose it served,

Oh. I was kind of joking about the sadism thing but I can't say I'm surprised.

Kellen was a good listener and circled everything on the list in front of him.

Camber wrote the word "butt" on Cortlen's list and had to be excused from the table.

Cortlen was so upset by what his sister did that he stabbed her paper with his pencil and had to be excused from the table as well.

Santa watched the whole spectacle through his magic telescope as he whispered "Merry Christmas" in my ear.

Well to be fair you kind of brought this on yourself.
Why would you even do something like this? I can't even begin to get the vague impression of the point of this activity outside of--
oh good, check it out:

Surplus EXP now.
Whatever, I'm leveling through that. Too close to the cap anyway to care about such nonsense.
I didn't even know you could get fatigue on EXP. Did I just discover this?
Oh right, you.
Uhhh--
In conclusion, you're a cunt.

DISGUST

Once in a while there's a blog that's bad (bad like all the rest) but there's also a certain layer of je ne sais quoi to it that makes me feel like I just stepped in dog shit. Originally I had a very specific blog in mind but after what I suspect might have been a certain entry on the subject the journal has since been purged.
At least, I hope I played a role in her exile from the internet.
Probably not.
Anyway I found a suitable replacement in "Ramblings from the dark room" and it's my favorite series of events: agree that you're 14 or older to get in, then agree you're 14 to read each entry. Gentlemen, we are in flavor country.
You might remember her from this entry about stuff called THE BATTLEFIELD AWAITS.
I actually had to reread what I wrote to remember my problem with her and I think I figured it out. All I remember was she was all up on my tits.

I'm back from vacation, that is - not to be confused with being back in the saddle. :) And I realized today that I'm a sneaky, untruthful, semi-controlling, mindfreak. I should've been a lawyer...I've known it all along, but I'm just now admitting it to myself.

See what I mean? Who's proud that they should be a lawyer? That's like saying "yeah I should be a bloodsucking leech, pretty awesome, isn't it?" NO, WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

I know things that I shouldn't know because I've obtained information in ways I shouldn't have, but it's all part of the game, I guess.

>obtain information
>ways you shouldn't
Alien concept to me.

She leaves for military duty this week...she will be gone for 4 days. I think we need the break. A week of being couped up inside a car with someone really tests ones patience. LOL She leaves Thursday morning, so I will be a free bird on Thursday night....

Why would you even be with this person if you say shit like that?
And now I'm supposed to act like their lovers' tiffs are funny when I'm just sitting here getting fucking angry.

Dear Carnival,
Thank you for ruining my dream vacation and Elphie's first {real} vacation ever.

No don't care.
Another entry dedicated to her trouble planning a cruise. We should all have such problems.

Headed straight for the weekend (no pun intended - currently I am living and loving the lesbian lifestyle)!

Ohhhhhhh. Yes. I remember now. Apparently she had a happy life and a kid or some shit then decided she wanted to be a lesbian (or came to the deep spiritual conclusion she is a lesbian however that happens) and then she proceeded to blame everyone but herself for the ensuing chaos. Also she fails to mention that poor spawn she had.
I think I see why I only feel revulsion for flowergrl2.
I feel like I pick on gay people or transsexual people a lot in these blogs and I promise it's not any sort of deep hatred of gays (specifically) it's generally my deep hatred of my fellow man and there just happens to be a lot of gay people on Livejournal.

Elphie has military duty this weekend so she won't be anywhere near me.. :( I miss her when she's gone...especially at night in bed (and not just because of the {usually} great sex!!), I just enjoy sleeping together.

Yeah.
Yeah--
Why did I quote this again?

Dual counseling today....more carpooling...money saved....gym at 6am...vacation unknown...lunch in the park....job security null and void. That's my life in one sugar-coated little nutshell! :)

Duel counseling sounds like an awesome job.

Elphie and I are fine. I'm slowly learning to communicate with her more effeciently and not just get lost up in my own head so quickly when "issues" present themselves, followed by stuffing things down into my "numb" file where they are forgotten and left for dead.

What the fuck am I reading?
Who thinks about themselves this much (besides everyone on the internet)?

I'm trying to remain positive about the twists and turns of life. Elphie assures me she's not going anywhere and that makes me feel secure...love is all that really matters, after all - right?

No I'm pretty sure there's more in life that matters than just love.
Well, relatively. I guess ultimately nothing really matters but you get what I mean.

Nothing too incredibly interesting today...I guess I could state that sometimes Elphie and I seem kinetically connected and other times we seem worlds apart. The other night, out of nowhere, she cuddles up to me in bed and her hands go directly "downtown." Now, this girl knows me..she knows what I like in bed.

I honestly get the impression this woman isn't really a lesbian and she's just doing this out of some sort of childish sense that it's something naughty that she shouldn't be doing.
I'd also like to point out "kinetically connected" doesn't make a ton of sense. That'd literally be "connected through motion".
Which, actually-- yeah, you do seem to be connected just because you're going through the motions.

She knows what it takes to get me going. As I type this, I'm thinking it almost feels as if she was trying to spark a fight with me or something. She did her thing for a few minutes until I, realizing this scenario was going to produce nothing for me, rolled over and began to kiss and love on and touch her.

It's like reading about a 13 year old's first sexual encounter. Everyone has the right parts that kind of work now but no one quite knows what to do with them--

I figured if she was attempting to bring me pleasure, she must want some, right?! WRONG!

Rush of bizarre memories-- anyone remember that move Commando with Arnold Schwarzenegger?
YOU HAVE TO COOPERATE WITH US, RIGHT?
WRONG!
and then he shot the guy in the fucking face. Man I should watch that movie tonight.

She became instantly pissed off and withdrawn. She immediately turned over and started crying. All the while I was trying to talk to her and calm her down. She was muttering things like "...you aren't attracted to me anymore...you don't like the way I touch you...this is all over...you don't want me touching you..." YIKES!

Know what you ladies need? A little Marvin Gaye.
Not the song to use obviously but it's my favorite.

I just held her while she broke down cuz there was no talking her down off of the ledge...I've learned! She finally came back around... I told her I simply wasn't in the mood and didn't want to fake an orgasm just to appease her while deceiving her at the same time.

Heh, women. Double the women, double the crazy, am I right guys?

She was still a little hurt and started comparing our relationship to that of her last one where sex was used as a weapon.

Ha, another bizarre thought just occurred to me. Remember that scene in Black Ops where Weaver (or Mason or someone I can't keep these characters straight) started yelling about how Nova 6 becoming weaponized?
Ha, yeah. Sex has become weaponized. And then you assassinate JFK.
Anyway--

Finally I got her to understand that the fact that I couldn't cum without any type of foreplay whatsoever had nothing to do with her ex or her prior relationship and more to do with me just needing something extra.

I finally got her to understand she's being irrational, Christ all mighty.

She claimed (after her mental breakdown) that she has ESP of sorts and that it's a trait she gets from her mother. (gag)

Wow. What?
I never thought I'd say this but this makes lesbian sex seem really boring and melodramatic.
I guess this is closer to reality but I dunno.

Elphie and I have been doing ok - steady as she goes. Sunday we had a major malfunction however and I was hurt by her actions and words. Let me back up briefly... Saturday she was extremely sick..she had a migraine headache and was all stuffed up and basically just had a really hard time.

Did I tell you guys I hit leatherworking fatigue yesterday? Too much tanning--
Yeah, check it out:
You can tell by the yellow numbers at the bottom (usually they're white) also her "leatherworking bonus" has increased. No one is quite sure what that means or what they plan to do with it but suffice it to say I'm not wasting wind shards not getting full SP.
I was hoping it would reset today since I'm pretty sure I started leatherworking day 1 but apparently I didn't. It'll probably be Friday or Saturday or some fuck like that.
Oh well, I'll just gather wind shards and level alchemy and weaving until then. Be ready to muscle to fatigue again, YEAAAAAH SON.

Anyhoo...I allowed her to rest while I cleaned..she pretty much slept and stayed in bed all day. I would bring her meds, and drinks, and hot compresses and food...she didn't have to lift a finger. I was genuinely concerned about her health and just wanted her to get better. Finally, Saturday night around 10pm she started to come around.

No time to search the world around
'cause you know where I'll be found
when I come around

We discussed doing all the things on Sunday that we had planned for Saturday but were unable to accomplish due to her being sick, which included going to the gym, going out for coffee, going to Costco and Barnes & Noble...just little things.

I heard it all before
so don't knock on my door
I'm a loser and a user so I don't need no accuser
to try and slag me down 'cause I know you're right

I went into full-on pout mode...I got in the car and hauled ass home. No more room for errands...

What's happening?
Oh I skipped like three paragraphs because I suddenly remembered a Green Day song.

We got to the Barnes & Noble part and that's where the story takes a bad turn. I'm sitting in one of the aisles minding my own business, reading a book I had taken an interest in. Suddenly Elphie comes up to me in a rushed pace and quiet voice..."I just saw Sam." ok.......?? I didn't say anything... "I said hi..." ok........? I nodded and put my head back down in my book. She sat down next to me..."ready to go?" Ummmm, no. **I should explain - Sam is her ex-girlfriends dad.** I looked up and said "no, not really - are you trying to tell me you want to go?" I am reading her body language and covert voice inflections here...she is petrified that the ex is going to barge in to Barnes & Noble and cause a scene of sorts.

Usually it's good writing to put new dialogue into its own paragraph. I've had stories that go several pages without a full line because there's a dialogue between two people. You don't have to wall up, here.
It has what we in the business call "momentum" and makes for a quicker, enjoyable read instead of some fuck.
Starts to feel like an actual conversation between two people, you know?

then my head starts swimming...does she not want to be "seen" with me? Is she afraid seeing the ex will churn up old feelings?

I like how you call her unreasonable but look at this shit.
Goddamn.
Anyway I have this completely awesome plan to get leatherworking to 50. My plan is so genius I'm not even going to share it with other people yet.
On a completely unrelated note: if you're on Lindblum and have buffalo hides, sheepskin or Gigantoad skin I'm paying top dollar.

Is she truly afraid of a scene? Who would really cause a scene in a bookstore? She knows this girl rather well after spending six years with her - she should know how she's going to react. All of these things started running thru my pissed off mind... I grabbed my stuff, got up, walked to the front of the store to pay for the books I was reading. I am being KICKED OUT OF A STORE BECAUSE THE EX MIG

HT WALK IN????? BULLSHIT!!!!!

TOP DOLLAR. Don't try to sell me dodoskin though.

Apparently nothing was juicy about Elphie's counseling visit last week...if it was - I am failing to recall it. :)

HELLBENT FOR LEATHER, WISHIN' MY GAL WAS BY MY SIDE--
Man you're just a gross person. Writing all this fuck like anyone gives a fuck, acting like a complete twit while expecting others to do and act in ways you cannot or will not?
What the fuck is wrong with you, anyway? Is it even healthy to be this wrapped up in another person even if you're "in love" which is apparently the only thing that matters?
I think a lot more matters. Like progress and knowledge and shit.
No but you're intellectually dead inside. You probably don't even fully understand this feeling you call love. It's just a vestigial word for an emotion you've never truly felt. You've just heard about it and reckon your girlish crush on another girl is the genuine article. I swear to fuck everything you write just screams "high school drama" and "forbidden love" even though no one really gives two shits. What, did you miss out on that in high school (not missing much) and decided now would be the time at the ripe age of 33?
Fuck.
Anyway tomorrow is a new day. No rest for the wicked.

PRETENTIOUSNESS

Now we're crossing the great divide. Boredom, creepiness and douchiness, like their counterparts lust, gluttony and I've heard argued greed (though I certainly wouldn't argue this) are possibly inborn flaws and so therefore the punishment, at least according to Dante, is less than what follows.
However, pretentiousness is a choice you make, and so therefore the retribution will be terrible indeed.
You may remember Dice_Dork (fuck) from the rather tellingly named "I Ain't Even Mad" and, for a rare move on my part, a second part entitled Capitalism, Ho! the following update.
You may recall the solemn vow I took:

My goal in life is to punch you right in the fucking mouth, Chris.

And I never forget a grudge.

I'm going to start something new here.

This icon will indicate boring stuff ahead.

The implication being when the "funny stick figure man typing crazily" isn't present what you're typing is somehow fucking awesome. I guess I'll go ahead and give it to him: he at least considered his audience. Good thing there, Chris. Good things seldom happen when blogging is involved so I'll be sure to note them when they do come up.

I'm not a big fan of filters for things people don't want to see. (The exception to that would be a filter for over share--not everyone on my FL wants to know about my sex life.)

This entire idea is so alien to me. You have, perhaps, the greatest technological achievement ever in the internet (landing on the moon is arguably more impressive but no one seems to be doing anything with it, as nearsighted as that is) and you want to censor yourself from naughty ideas? This is like Warhammer logic. You can genetically enhance and indeed clone people, destroy entire planets, terraform worlds and yet there's an inquisition and witch hunts?
I guess it's as I've always said: common birth, common man.

I've had some unreasonably stupid reactions in the past to folks demanding I remove their ability to see certain things. Mostly I just firmly believe in everyone's ability to scroll down.

Yeah this is a dead end argument. "IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT DON'T FUCKING READ IT!" despite all the wisdom it contains, inevitably falls on the deaf and unwilling.

I took a few days "off" after school ended. I actually do better with daily goals I set myself to if I first take some time off. Life just seems to have a better balance if I feel like I've blown off some steam first.

I just noticed his icon appears to be the Justice Tarot from Persona 3.
Fuck I just remembered the quote Nyx Avatar says when he switches to Justice mode: "to find the one true path, one must seek guidance amidst uncertainty" and then half my team dies to instant kill spell bullshit.
Fuck you, Nyx Avatar.
Oh well, at least that fight had some ballin' music.
It goddamn better for being like a 2 hour fight. That I failed twice due to being underleveled.

Now I'm back, though. I've had a few things on my mind. Some I can blog openly about and others I can't.

Oh right, this. I guess it's as Nyx Avatar says: "it matters not who you are, death awaits all."

This story starts with me wanting to give back.

No seriously, this story begins with me feeling that overly-sentimental pull to give back to a community that I've gotten so much from.

What community is that? Blogging? Furries?

I've LARPed for a couple of years, and I figured I could help someone engineer that experience I so love for others. Fair's fair, right?

Oh, LARPing. Also known as the death of dignity.
LARPing, for those of you blessedly unfamiliar, stands for Live Action Role Playing and it's basically Dungeons and Dragons sans self-respect and rules.

What happened next was more than a little silly, but let's just say that the first person to come along and take me up on my offer to help run a LARP had an...ambitious plan. And I'm using "ambitious" as a euphemism for insane...like nucking futs insane. (But the good kind of nucking futs insane--the kind you look back on and say "Man that was stupid, but MAN that was awesome!!!) This has the potential to be Ninjas and Pirates team up to fight Zombies caliber cool--

Pirates and ninjas teaming up, wow. We sure are scraping the "internet fad 2006" barrel for that one.

Anyway, now I'm starting to realize that running three games with a linking arc has this side effect that I didn't consider. Three games is like "all but two" of the time slots for the whole weekend. We will literally end up conflicting with over half of the other LARPs for the entire convention. A lot of really awesome peeps are running some really awesome sounding games at the same time as us.

I can't believe there are more than 15 people in the entire world interest in this.
Oh what am I saying "can't believe". I can perfectly well believe it.

So I've studied both post-colonial theory and Orientalism, which aren't exactly the same but have huge areas of overlap and a lot of recurring tropes. I've even spent a non-insignificant period of my adulthood self-identifying as Muslim.

>non-insignificant
>significant is a word
Getting a little angry now.
AWWWW YEAH FFXIV PATCH YO.
I hit fatigue for leatherworking today which is really kind of sad but I'm pretty sure it resets tomorrow (?) so no worries.

And yet I'm still unsure where I would put Islamaphobia on the racism scale.

Same place I'd put fear of Christians or Buddhists I reckon. That is, Muslim isn't a race.
Holy shit this patch was like 5 MB. They're literally only adding the new search function, aren't they?
Not that it's a small thing or anything, but I dunno.

It seems to me to be something TIED to race in a correlative way. People seem to lump Islam in with Arabs and pretty much presume vice versa. And I've even heard anti-Muslim sentiment referred to as "racism against brown people."

Yeah but I've also been accused of Orientalism for finding brown girls attractive and contributing to the "remnants of crusader culture" (dead fucking serious [whatever that means]) so I don't think you get it both ways, pussy.
I was initially incredibly honored at the idea of contributing to crusader culture because fuck yeah the Crusades but then I realized this wasn't leveled as a good thing at me.
Whatever. Prepare to be purged, heathen. I'm still not entirely sure what they meant by that but Asian girls of all directions are attractive.

Certainly secular Arabs exist, and sometimes even engage in the most vociferous Islamaphobia, moderate Muslims try to distance themselves from more extremist groups and there are millions upon millions of ethnically Caucasian Muslims--Eastern Europeans being the largest groups but also large populations throughout Europe, and let's not forget converts. Technically, if you want to talk statistics, the largest populations of Muslims are EASTERN Asian--they live in China, Burma, Indonesia, and Malaysia.

Uh-huh. Let's talk about brown girls instead. A topic I find far more interesting than whatever these words that suddenly appeared on my screen and block quote form are.

Maybe my perceptions of Islam are colored too much by my own experience with it. I can't become another race, so when I became Muslim, it may have very much biased me towards the view of Islam as a religion, not an ethnicity.

My perception of Islam is that they keep their delicious brown girls covered in ridiculous Pac-Man ghost fashion. Deal with it.
That's why they're so angry I think. Christ all mighty, living in the 11th century and what consolation you have has to wear a drape like it's furniture and then it's so hot out there, good grief. Get these people some air conditioning.

Obviously I'm not talking about antagonism towards anyone wearing a turban--a particularly ignorant move on a bigot's part since the turbans almost always denote a Sikh rather than a Muslim anyway.

Or Abu from Aladdin.

Obviously I'm not talking about suspicious gazes as anyone with dark skin. That is clearly racism.

I don't trust anyone, dark skin or no.
For it is written: a suspicious mind is a healthy mind.

With Judaism, there's a sort of acknowledgment that the word "Jew" might be ethnic OR religious and often is some kind of hybrid between the two. And yet a lot of these same confusions seem to surround "antisemitism."

Arabs are Semites I get it. Fuck.
Why didn't this get your "I'm really boring" tag, exactly?

I understand that I tempt the irony demons. I do. I use "epic" to describe a cheeseburger and then roll my eyes when someone says "literally" before hyperbole.

I am literally going to find you and punch you in the face.
THIS IS A WRITTEN THREAT.

I am sure that somewhere my actions give an irony demon strength, and some day they may tear me to pieces,

Oh God please let this be so.

The article below is from the Washington Post detailing how Obama has quietly used executive power to expand federal rights and benefits for gays and lesbians.

Obama is a politician not a paladin.

If he were a paladin I'd have felt better about voting for him I'm sure.

He weights costs and benefits with a keen mind for how to work around obstructionism....and then he does what he can.

Hey wait I call bullshit. Paladins must be lawful good and using the law to extend your own goals is neutral at best. I'd personally contend using the law for your own ends is the epitome of chaos but I'm weird like that.

Ever notice that no matter how evolved Star Trek: TNG supposed to be, it's still a pair of able-bodied heterosexual white men telling people from various non-privileged groups how they ought to live?

No. Remember that episode with the psychic Romans? And there was a midget for some reason.
Oh that was the old one not "TNG", my mistake.

Or that for our incredibly enlightened future of incredible enlightenment, the crew is still mostly white.

What about Geordi? Worf was a Klingon and they're not even human.
Two of the primary cast are black and non-human, respectively.

Yes, that's a Ke$sha reference in my title. What y'all DON'T know about me could just about fill a cargo carrier.

Like you're gay, apparently.

I love boots on women. I have loved boots on women for a long time. I'm sure they are perfectly nice on men too, but I am tragically a flaming heterosexual.

Coulda fooled my ass.

About half the women on either campus I attend seem to be in boots anymore.

It's almost like it's cold outside and women wear boots in cold weather.
... Nah that's just crazy.

Whether it's something of dubious aesthetic value like Uggs, or the gloriously welcome fashion that has (forgive the pun) cropped up of riding boots.

... Is that a pun? Crop, riding crop, riding boots--
Fuck it I'm just going to give it to him to save myself this headache.

Healed, not, vinyl, leather, plether, whatever.

Heeled. Pleather. It stands for "plastic leather".
What do you call tanning not involving curing?
TAWING, though tawing isn't by definition tanning.
What do you call someone who makes shoes? A COBBLER.
What's that little hammer tanners use? AN AWL.
FUCK I KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT TANNING NOW.

They are one yummy accessory.

There is no way you say "yummy accessory" without having sucked at least one dick. Also I'm admittedly no expert on fashion but I'm pretty sure shoes aren't accessories.
Unless you live in the third world, of course HOOOOOOOOOOO--

But the very commonality of boots is lowering their awesome curve considerably.

Oh fuck you, hipster.

Used to be maybe one in twenty women wore boots, and they jumped out at you. BAM! Hi there! We're boots!

Used to sit by the statute of Athena at my campus and watch the girls walking by.
Those were good hours wiled away with Athena.
Of course I didn't think anything homo like this but whatever.

But like anything else, part of their charm wasn't objectively aesthetic, but had more to do with their relief against common fashion.

I'm amazed we're almost three paragraphs in and for a supposedly "flaming heterosexual" he hasn't mentioned the most obvious feature of any heeled shoe: they make the ass look firmer.

It's kind of like cleavage in a corset is very interesting, but if you're walking around Ren Faire, pretty soon you're kind of like "Ho hum, cleavage"

No way you are straight. It's okay, dude. Just be gay.
Now some sort of bondage queen (going by the avatar) comments, I never get comments-- OH GOD ARE YOU A HAMBEAST. IN BOOTS.
Now some kind of hipster bitch posts a picture of herself. Is that why this guy acts like this? Getting all the mad hipster pussy?
I can respect that--

I don't really have time to get INTO the thoughts right now, but between now and the last time I read The Tempest I took a criticism class, and my brain is going CRAZY with how post structuralists must have gone crazy on this play--

Maybe I'm just stupid but I thought The Tempest was cool because of that badass wizard guy.
In fact that's why I like almost all of what I read, not because "HURRR ORIENTALISM AND POST-STRUCTURALISM" God you're a pretentious douche.
Anyway this meandering post has dragged on long enough I feel and like the other two times I've viewed his blog I kind of forget what I'm talking about and just awash in pretentiousness.
So I guess it's safe to say "ye guilty".

DOUCHINESS

I feel like King Minos this week, coiling my great serpentine tail, each knot representing one further level of hell to which my victim sinks, then uncoiling it and throwing them deep into the Stygian abyss.
King Minos must be the only dude having fun in Hell because there is kind of a catharsis to it.
Today we have Embracable (not a word) Aberration (HERESY) from "Eris_Devotee" which if you didn't know Eris is the goddess of discord. If we take all Western mythology as a kind of continuous thing she has caused the following:
The Trojan War
The Founding of Italy
The Founding of England
The subsequent collapse of the Roman Empire
The Dark Ages
All from one event. Pretty damn impressive bit of trolling. In fact, it's probably the troll.
You might remember this douche from this entry entitled "Life's the same" where I astutely note:

Also as a supposed "devotee to Eris" shouldn't you be glad at the discord in your life? I mean that is what Eris does, you know.

But no it's incessant whining about bullshit most of these revolve around health issues which I'm almost positive are fictional.
Also I'd like to take this time to mention that yes, like Dante's Inferno each day is a progressively worse sin.

The weather is not cooperating with my attempts to switch over to yet another psychiatrist. bleh. I just need meds, I'm not interested in the head-shrinking right now.

I AM WEAK AND WORTHLESS AND JUST NEED MEDS. I DON'T NEED TO CONFRONT MY PROBLEMS.

I need a doc who finds pot a non-issue, or is at least familiar enough with its effects that there's no perceived potential conflict with the other meds I take.

I'm sure doctors take a similar agreement to teachers in this regard: legally they're not allowed to hear you talk about illegal activities without reporting it. Kid comes in telling me he's high? Whoa, gotta write it up. Sorry kid.
Personally feelings about pot aside I am legally required to do it. My personal thoughts have no bearing on this issue.
It's called being an adult, Eris_Devotee. Where real life is often disagreeable to sense.

It's a simple equation - without weed I can't eat. Or better phrased - I just don't eat. It's not merely an appetite thing. I have gut problems from auto-immune issues and pot eases the post-eating cramping.

Uh-huh.
You do realize pot helps with nausea, not muscle cramps, yeah? A muscle relaxant is what you need.

They'd give me muscle relaxers, and pot is MUCH easier on the system than daily use of flexeril/etc, so I don't see the problem and I can't trust a doc who lectures me for 20 minutes, at both visits, about WEED.

Because you're completely insane and pot does not help with muscle cramps.
He was probably just trying to convince you you need help which I'm sure was an uphill battle.

I've never even had a doc lecture me like that about cigarettes and those are actually bad for me.

Pot has a lot of bad shit in it too, you know. You just tend not to smoke it as much so the effects aren't (in theory) as bad. I mean most healthy people can stand it perfectly well but for someone with as many health problems as you claim to have I'd be a little careful.

I keep trying to write my annual year in review, but egads a lot happened this year... and most of it wasn't documented in this journal. For the first time since I started this thing, I stopped posting almost daily... I went to semi-monthly... EEP.

OH NO WHAT A LOSS!

Sure, it took almost getting a divorce, dancing on the edge of dying and the removal of a piece of my body to get here, but here is where I landed.

This sounds almost interesting, so let's be sure to skip right over it.

Perhaps compared to the population at large, I can't consider what I have right now to be "good health" but compared to my own relative scale I'm 10 years healthier.

Called it.

I'm not delusional about still having lupus, though, and I'm not rushing back to my former non-stop productivity bullshit.

Oh, ho, ho what a turn of events. I called that fuck so hard.
I don't know why I'm proud of myself over this achievement because it's clear she's just mental but fuck it I'm awesome.

Bob is in therapy and taking meds and for the first time in his life he can recognize symptoms of anxiety and separate them from his circumstances (ie - not blame something going on around him for what is going on inside of him).

Your environment can cause anxiety, though. Anxiety isn't a bad thing that happens, only when it happens for no reason. It's like fear or anger, or your natural aversion to bitter things: there is an evolutionary purpose for it.

OMG Sharon, it was you? Fuck you, you goddamned drama queen.

Oh.
So before I had her pegged at the seventh circle of hell (anger) but now I'm moving her to eight (fraud), specifically Bolgia 6: hypocrisy.

You didn't bother calling about my surgery... so why the fuck would you read my journal? You don't care about anyone but yourself, and that's SO obvious with everything that has happened with Bob.

Shit, calling her out. I guess. What's happening? Who is Sharon?

All you've ever offered him was someplace to sleep - but your "advice" has always made his life worse when he takes it.

That's only Bolgia 2, though: flatterers. I would say, by Dante's reckoning, you are the worse person.

Besides, it's not like you haven't had your share of bad things to say about me. Do you even know the meaning of the word "hypocrite"?

Apparently you don't, because you bitch that she's complaining about you where you can read it while complaining about her where she can read it.
My only conclusion is off with both your heads.

Susan - you are an asshole. Why do you read this journal? Oh, right - because your pathetic life doesn't leave you with much else to do. Or maybe you're obsessed?

I like this new turn where she's just calling all of her readers out. I'm waiting for "anonymous asshole who said mean things about me on the internet" because if anyone is self-obsessed enough to find my blog, it is her.

the nephew who is being socially promoted through high school... oh, he's in a band, and he spent better than an hour watching himself in his mother's mirror making his poses. Meanwhile, some other kid is playing till his fingers bleed and I wonder which one will go anywhere with their music.

Have you even heard modern music?

Adding Graves to lupus was proving to be potentially fatal for me,

Graves' in general is potentially fatal.
Actually so is Lupus, come to think of it.
Well fortunately you're just crazy the old-fashioned way.

GOOD STUFF

I'm already busting out of my new bras.

:\

My concerted effort to gain weight has been successful and I'm at 115. 5 more lbs to my goal, and by that time I'll be a 34-D. I'm a 32 C/D right now and I've got me some 37 inch hips!

:/

WAH I wanna be out of limbo,

Good news, then: I have you pegged at layer 8, bolgia 6 in Hell. Congratulations! You almost cannot get much lower.

This morning I had a consultation with a thyroid specialist (which is a sub-specialty of endocrinology)

Oh, a thyroid specialist, dealing specifically with the thyroid, part of the endocrine system, is an endocrinologist. Thanks for that.

I'm in a holding pattern, waiting for the proper circumstances for thyroid surgery.

REMEMBER YOUR FORMATION, BROTHERS!
TO THE WALL!
THESE BUSHES WILL PROVIDE COVER!
I've been revisiting Dawn of War 2 between leatherworking in FFXIV.
Which, speaking of:

Even though this is wildly inaccurate, even at the time of writing.
Leatherworking (that would be the middle one, currently) has moved up an entire three, three, three (!) ranks in two days. Also good ol' Edie is approaching level 41. Nine more to go before I can bitch about no longer gaining experience as indeed 50 is the cap. I add SP and EXP gains together to determine whether an action is worth performing and with no EXP gain at all I'll have to restructure my entire system.

Health = same/waiting.

Oh yes, back to this insanity.
I know you cannot physically measure no change over time because entropy is, by definition, change/time.
Oh we're actually treading old territory now. I mean, older territory. Territory I've already covered.
So read that old entry if you care so much.
Humbug.

CREEPINESS

Amazingly for a man who spends a majority of his day in isolation and loathing his fellow man and, indeed, one of his main hobbies is making fun of other people, I find a lot of you Livejournal users creepy. Not overtly creepy per se, but that subtle kind of creep like you might actually be a giant preying mantis insectoid alien underneath the human suit, your chitinous black carapace glistening with the red gore of your prey-- anyway, I'm sure you all remember my friend Victorgreywolf.
He has the dubious honor of being tied for most links from my blog, actually. My original post is one of my personal favorites (God, does my glory know no limits?) and is entitled "Small Steps Corrupt".
In many ways we have my friend Victorgreywolf to thank for this entire bit because I was reviewing this very entry when I got the idea for this bit.
Anyway enough whinging, on to it.
Oddly for one so creepy his blog is entitled "you creep me out, lol" which I have to assume is something a girl said to him once and he's now parroting.

When do you get your holiday shopping done? Weeks before or last minute?

The pressing questions of our time on Livejournal.

I don't shop that much, but if and when I decide to, it is usually whenever.

All right. I can't imagine why anyone would want to post this but I can't say it's creepy so far.
Err, well, his location is listed as "your mother's crotch" but the actual body of the post isn't anything too out of the ordinary.
Now he has a newsletter post in multicolored font which is very fruity of him.

All right, ladies and gentlemen. (I know, most of you aren't ladies or gentlemen, but it's respectful nonetheless.) I am here and ready to start the newsletter for December 17, 2010. So, without further ado, here we go with the newsletter:

I'm not a gentleman. I'm a knight.
Also I like how this newsletter is specifically for December 17th, 2010. I guess all of these events will occurred on that date. Usually a personal newsletter is kind of the year in retrospect but I'm glad blogging has brought us up to speed on what's going on with absolutely fucking nothing.

I am going to try to get some college courses in the spring, and since I applied for a teaching position, I hope to get the job in the fall, which is when my application will be reviewed, according to the people who I sent it to. (In case you're wondering, it is a local place.)

I have to go through a background check (in theory, I'm pretty sure it does nothing) every time I enter my high school. I can't believe this guy passes that, or, even less likely, he hasn't raped a little boy in his life.

As far as this week goes, with the celebrity deaths, I have to say in all honesty, I couldn't feel happier, especially since alot of them I don't like are going away. I do feel bad about the death of Bob Guccione, and last year, the death of Hayden Brooks, but as far as the rest of them go, I have to say, it couldn't have happened to a bunch of nicer people, mainly because celebrities are pieces of shit.

Oh yeah, I totally forgot he had this bizarre hatred for anyone famous, which is strange since he seems to want to be famous himself. Jealousy perhaps? Misplaced, future-oriented self loathing? Who knows. Who cares.
The last bit of his newsletter is in pale blue and yellow font, respectively, which is nearly impossible to read on a white background.

Okay, so gay groups are demanding an pology from the Governing body of FIFA Sepp Blatter for his comment entitled:

"I think they (homosexual fans) should refrain from sexual activity in Quatar."

Probably smart considering I think you get fucking killed for being gay in Qatar.
It's like saying "hey if you're black you might want to avoid Kannapolis, NC because it's one of the few places in the US with an active KKK chapter."

Well, unfortunately, it is true that behaviors like that are illegal, but that is someting that can't be helped, since you are born homosexual, but people in those countries can't see it that way, for some reason. How do they know there aren't homosexuals amongst them? Further more, what would happen if they were that way, right?

Oh yeah, let's go reason with the government in Qatar.

I really don't know what to say, as far as this one goes, so I shall end it at that.

That is all I wanted to say. Thank you for taking the time to listen to my opinion.

>I don't know what to say
>thanks for listening to my opinion
Sure, I guess?

People making a big deal out of the pedo Jackson dying, and the death of john Lennon. Man, let those go already. Nobody talks about people like rodney dangerfield, and he was a way better enterainter that those two bozos

Way better "enterainter" than Michael Jackson and John Lennon.
Okay, dude. You pretty much could not have picked two bigger names in the history of pop culture and then you trot out, of all people, Rodney Dangerfield as the contender?

Okay, So December 8 marks the 30th anniversary of the beatle whose looks completely creeped me out as a kid, John Winston Ono Lennon. What a creepy looking person, and I thought the child molesting, 12 year old boy tea bagging Michael Jackson was creepy.

Yes, the man who sang "Let It Be" and "Watching the Wheels" is indeed as creepy as a pedophile. You know Watching the Wheels, right? A song about letting go and being fucking cool?
Yeah, real creepy.

Anyway, he was murdered on this date at midnight by a Christianese religious fanatic named Mark David Chapman. Man, those religious nutcases are really something. Now before people attack me, do your homework.

I'm still kind of distracted by the term "Christianese", honestly.

It was true, Chapman claimed to be a christian, and attacked Lennon, because of hypocrosy. Sure, Lennon preached about activism, and no material possessions, but it was just for music, not to live that lifestyle. He lived how he chose to live.

I'm pretty sure Lennon preached against materialism, which doesn't outright say "don't own shit" it just says you shouldn't treasure the things you do own too much.
I mean the guy might have been a huge hypocrite, I have no idea, but being wealthy doesn't necessarily preclude speaking against materialism.

Sure, as far as myself goes, I speak against Christianity, but I am not a Christian (Not since 2001) and anyways, so someone said they are more popular than Jesus Christ. Anyone can be. He never existed, except in a book, and when the Beatles said that, they had a boycott. Why? Because some pastors encouraged it, right?

>never existed except in a book
>many people take that book to be historical fact
Welp.

Well, I am more popular than Jesus. Big deal. So what, are they going to boycott me? No, of course not.

Of course not. Who the fuck are you?

So, Chapman did a very stupid thing, Instead of remembering him, Which is probably close to impossible, especially today, try to look at Lennon's life as it was, not as his death.

That is all I wanted to say. Thank you for taking the time to listen to my opinion.

So-- do you like him or no? This is my problem with Victorgreywolf. He starts out very antagonistic but then ends kind of neutral. It's a very schizophrenic performance.
The post is even entitled "John Lennon, Total Creep." I'd at least expect some conviction from that instead of, well, "remember him for his life, not his death" which I think is generally a positive thing to say about someone.

OKay, so California is facing yet ANOTHER hurdle where Same sex marriages would be allowed. They allowed it briefly, and now this.

I mean, a state that produces BOTH hetero AND gay porn, and a place that has the most openly gay and lesbian city in the USA opposes same sex marriages.

I don't get it. Is this not America, where people can be honest about who they are?

No. Where'd you get that idea?

I mean, I forget if it was Crazy Horse, or something, but he had two men on the side while having one in an Indian Tribe, some parts of China allowed men to marry men since the 1500's, and in some tribes in West Africa, women were allowed to marry women.

Oh that does show how hypocritical America is, citing three groups entirely removed from the US government. CHECKMATE!

(Although I haven't made my own XXX movie yet, but I will, when I get the opportunity.)

Somehow I don't think you're allowed to sell the kind of porn you'd make.

Conventional society didn't inspire me, but sex did.

First person to experience that, goddamn. It's not like inspiration is typically depicted as a sexy woman (or a group if you're lucky) or anything.
Wait--

There is one thing I need to say on here, in case people haven't seen it: There have been people from foreign countries who don't have their journals in English. I have to say this on here. I will no longer accept friend requests from people who don't have journals in English.

Seems counter-intuitive to me to make an entry saying you won't accept friend requests from people who don't speak English in English.

Okay, I just briefly saw something on Yahoo called the "American Idol" effect, where contestants on the show aren't as successful as they think. Same thing happened with Adrianne Curry of America's next top model with that Tyra Skanks.

The bottom line is that success doesn't happen for everyone, and reality television isn't a stepping stone for people to move on from there.

Not everyone is meant to be famous. Unlike me, Victorgreywolf.
La la, skipping through the rest of this--

Try shooting for realistic goals, and not worry about fame or whatever. Whatever is meant to be will be,

>it takes hard work to become famous!
>whatever is meant to be will be
WHICH IS IT?

Okay, I was reading about a famous character in a video game named Donkey Kong. Well, they said less than 30 years ago. Kind of strange considering the game was around since the very late 70's (77-79) because that was when the first video game system the atari came out at that time, and Donkey kong was amongst the first, and from what I have heard, it was an addictive video game.

Actually it came out in the arcades first, Mr. Greywolf, and it was in 1981.

When did the first arcade craze truly start?

Arcades have been around since the early 1920s. They didn't have video games then but they had all the other shit one does at an arcade.

I believe it was 1976, when there were some games that came out.

Oh you're referring to video arcades, in which case the first arcade game was Galaxy Game in 1971, although Computer Space was the first one commercially sold, also in 1971.
Although the fad didn't catch on until Pong in 1972.
But the Golden Age of Arcades didn't really start until Taito's Space Invaders in 1978.
Anyway 1976 is pretty wrong.

I can't remember the names, but I was like 2 that year. I was like 4 or 5 when Pac-man and Donkey Kong hit the scene.

Pac-Man, Space Invaders, MOTHERFUCKIN' SINISTAR--
RUN, COWARDS!
Fuck yeah, the game insulted you for not playing.

Okay, so a pastor in Neptune, NJ (Hey, isn't there a plaet with that name?)

Don't know about "plaet" but there is a planet. And a god.
Ugh, who cares? Guy cheated on his wife with another guy and Victorgreywolf is very upset by this. What, upset he wasn't cheating with you?

If you could cast one type of magic spell, which would you choose, and why?

Power Word: Kill is the obvious choice.
Although type would imply school of magic in which case I pick black magic from Final Fantasy or Thaumaturgy from Daggerfall.

Why do I hate religion? Because of personally bad experiences I've had with believing in what it was, believing in God at one time. (man, what was I thinking believing in that shit, and allowing people to tell me how good it was?) and I felt, as a devoted atheist, I had to speak out against the garbage that is being shoved down people's throats everyday.

Yeah I threw down one fanaticism for another. Great move.

I say, tell the religions fuck you, and let reality take place. Reality is real. The afterlife is just a myth that can't be proven.

Can't be disproven either by that logic. I mean likely you're right but fuck, don't need to get all zealous about it.

Okay, I was watching a video on youtube, where Fred Phelps was saying "You're telling all these bathouse loving, anal coppulating fags that God loves them? You have bats in the belfry." Well, I wonder what his reaction would be if someone said to him and I quote: "Do you think they would care about something as miniscule and shallow as that kind of fantasia?" I mean, come on. *skeptical look*

Getting a skeptical look from Victorgreywolf. Watch your shit now, son.

Number one, God doesn't exist, okay. I mean, there is no such thing as that, especially since we've come from monkeys and apes (although some people's mentalities haven't officially evolved from cave types) and second, who cares about something as friviolous as that?!

I love how devoted a lot of these atheists are and fuck up science, something they ostensibly believe in, so hard. We didn't evolve "from" apes. We are apes right now, you chucklefuck. Christ all mighty.
God, atheists are as bad as the deeply religious. They are so annoying.

I mean, so Eric and Dylan had the anger in them to commit the school shooting, but did they actually play violent video games? I don't know. I know there was a doom version that had something called the "Harris" levels, but that was online, not in the video game version.

Referring to the Columbine massacre, and like everything vidya and Victorgreywolf he has no idea what he was talking about. The "Harris" levels are actually for Quake, not Doom. Further, the "video game version" he's referring to is the version you could buy in the stores and the maps are something you acquire online and are not initially included with the game.
So opinionated about things you have little understanding of, Victorgreywolf.

If you wanted to have children and had trouble conceiving, would you be more likely to consider IVF, surrogacy, or adoption, and why?

I love this question so much.

Only if we would have our own kids that way, as in my sperm and her eggs, I would consider IVF. Hell, I wanted to donate my sperm. Why?

Oh, I can answer that: because it'd be a loss to our species of your genetics were gone forever!
Also: pretty sure most 9 year olds can't carry a pregnancy to term. At least not a healthy one.

Besides, I don't know if I want children, I mean, with the heavy financial burdens, emotional burdens, bullying, and all the other problems, and all that, is it worth having kids? THAT should be the REAL question

Well if we don't the species dies out, so--

Okay, it seems a Chancellor in Germany wants the immigrants to their country to learn German and speak it without an accent, and to have Christian Values.

Oh no, if you want to live in Germany you should speak German?
Well fuuuuuck me!

I mean, number one, unless the immigrant came to their country before the age of 15, or as a baby, they can't learn it fluently enough and speak it without an accent.

That is unreasonable but you have to say extreme shit like that because people will take whatever your demand is and reduce it three levels so saying "speaking with fluency and without an accent" translates to "speaking passably well" in reality.

I mean, have you ever known an atheist or agnostic or non religious person using religion as an excuse to kill someone? Have the aforementioned ever used it as a reason to molest or be a pedophile? Have they also ever used it to hate people?

Aren't you kind of doing just that when you say you hate the religious?

Personally speaking, I have never known an atheist who raped, or murdered or became a hypocrit because of those religious books.

Yeah but I can tell you atheists have and do rape people. It ain't the religious books. Rapers gonna rape, etc.

A styory about a guy who goes inot the mountainous desert and becomes a sex slave to a tribe of savage women. Sounds like every man's fantasy.

Hey whoa, that may be your fantasy, but uh--
What results is a tirade against people who don't "accept him for him" because that's his fantasy. I bet there are websites that will help you with this fantasy, friend.
Anyway this entry has dragged on long enough and I HAVE ANOTHER ONE TO DO TOMORROW (astute observers might notice I posted this at exactly 11:59 PM because I rolled the clock back to hit my deadline).