I could go on about this cunt, so I will.
Now, there's some controversy about him: specifically, there is a hypothesis out there that he is a girl. I don't know why I assumed he's a guy. I guess the name "Chris Brecheen" would lead me to believe he's a man, but as was pointed out that could easily be short for "Christina" so I don't really know. Actually I tell a lie. I can Google, let's find out~
Found his Facetube. That's a guy.
Well, now that's settled let's move on. He's updated since Monday.
My students are cheating.
Every semester I have a different configuration of cultural backgrounds.
Name one culture where cheating is an acceptable practice outside of "Dark Eldar" or "15th century Florence". Cheating is a lot like cowardice in that regard. Nearly every culture agrees you're a douche if you do this thing.
Certain cultures will actually do certain kinds of cheating accidentally if differences in expectations aren't made clear. Some East Asian countries wouldn't think twice about getting someone to run through and copy edit a paper for all its grammatical errors.
... That's cheating? I guess everyone at my college is a cheater, then, because there's an entire office devoted to running through your paper and checking the grammar. It's free of charge, even.
Sadly, my students perpetuate this stereotype. Last week I showed them how easy it was to tell what someone was looking at by setting up a couple of pieces of paper and asking them which one I was looking at. They got it right every time, even when I covered my eyes with that half hand move that students do when they totally think they're being slick and getting away with it.
>write answers on your shoes
>no one ever seems to question why you're glaring at your shoes
Welp.
Not that I'd ever need something so unscrupulous as that because I can basically take a mental photocopy but whatever, there you go, kids.
This week I gave a shout out to people to keep their eyes on their own papers when I saw a few gazes start to wonder.
>Gaze averts to the right during to a test
>Get genuinely interested as I realize all of her answers are wrong
>Hurry to finish so I can watch her fail
Man my life is awesome.
What they NEED is an experience with the hammer of American intolerance of any who would cheat at the meritocracy (I'm giggling as I write that, by the way--just so you know).
Yeah apparently we're not a meritocracy in the United States. I made the mistake to suggest last Thursday in class, ho-boy.
"WE'RE A WHAT?"
"A meri-- ruh-roh."
Fucking class, man.
OH FUCK I'M HEADED BACK THERE TOMORROW.
Goddamn.
I hate it when people ask sex questions on AMA because it always turns into a dogpile of the teens and young twenties assuming that them and their friends are a valid sample for drawing general assumptions--and dumb ones at that.
Isn't the point of drawing an assumption to be kind of vague and off?
but I know that anorgasmia isn't something women just need to "relax and get over except for maybe 1%" Just because teens today aren't running into so many cultural klaxons hammering into their heads that sex is bad doesn't mean that applies to all women everywhere of all ages.
>Encourage men to be sexually liberated
>Encouarge women to be sexually inhibited
SOCIEEEEETYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
No but it's as they say: a key that opens a lot of locks is a master key, but a lock that's opened by a lot of keys is a shitty lock.
Okay, as a writer (and not JUST as a writer but among a group of folks amongst whom could be counted writers, heavy--or considered maybe(?)--readers, lit majors, storytellers, film makers or students or film buffs or really anyone who really understands deeply what makes for a good story there is a tendency to read books, watch movies, ect with an eye on a somewhat different set of bellwethers than maybe most people do.
As a writer I really should learn how to edit my thoughts for length and clarity, hmm.
So I don't want to sound elitist or anything, but just to say that I may have watched the movie with different eyes than a lot of the reviews I'm watching that seem to want to focus on whether the end was a dream or "the real world."
I don't think you'd know a good movie if it hit you in the face.
However, I didn't have that in mind when I watched the end scene. What was going through my head was the dichotomy between wants and needs.
THIS ISN'T A REVIEW IT'S A CRITIQUE YOU BORE.
Here's a review:
I think this movie was shit, and here's why...
here's a critique:
the symbols in the movie were such that...
All good characters have both. They have something they want and they have something they need.
Only a shitty reviewer deals in absolutes, Christoph.
In a lot of stories this is pretty much the same thing. Rocky wants to go the distance. Rocky needs to prove to himself that he CAN go the distance.
You didn't pay attention to Rocky. Rocky wanted to be a champ so he needed to train hard, and even then he still failed. Even though he still failed he remained true to himself despite the adversity he faced, and so at the end he still got the girl and was the champ in his own mind. It's about not giving up and shit.
... You really didn't get the point of Rocky?
Wow it's almost like all these fancy college critical theory classes don't actually teach you how to pay attention to a fucking movie or something.
So if Rocky goes the distance he gets his needs and wants satisfied.
ROCKY WENT THE DISTANCE AND STILL LOST THE FIGHT, HOLY SHIT.
THAT'S THE BIG TWIST IN ROCKY. HE DID EVERYTHING RIGHT AND LOST.
I cannot get over this. How can you miss the point of a movie this hard and still be all pretentious about it?
See, every show has one episode where the antagonist would be a cake walk for the hero, but the hero is out of it due to injury or illness.
Or the entire Android Saga if you happen to be Dragonball Z.
I wonder if Pokemon Black and White has been leaked yet? I bet not--
Nope.
2. What do you notice first when checking out a suitor?
Well for you, powder puff, I'm sure it's "HE HAS A HUUUUGE COCK"
So...we know I'm a straight guy, right? Just checking.
No "we" weren't aware of this fact.
You will forgive "us" if "we" don't believe you.
Women that are interested in me tend to either be refreshingly forward or so brazen about making me know they're receptive that I would have to be a rock not to realize what was going on.
... Has that ever happened to you? This is such an alien scenario you've set that I can't imagine this actually happening. Maybe if everyone was speaking Russian and there were Chinese subtitles and it was an 18th generation bootleg this might have some context I understand.
Favorite drink?
Ice water. Sorry if that's boring.
Well you are boring. Like I said Monday, what'd you expect?
5. You are on an abandoned island, but can bring anyone as a sex slave. You choose....?
... What a bizarre thing to bring to a deserted island. I can't bring a radio so I can leave the island?
Like, what, I got to decide between something else and my sex slave I brought with me on this three hour tour, and so the sex slave came with me?
That'd really put a new twist on Gilligan's Island, come to think of it. Mary-Ann the kinky bondage slave.
Notice how I didn't pick Ginger because everyone expects that behavior from her and so therefore it's totally out of character. You always expect the innocent girl-next-door type first, see.
That's why I tell the jokes.
Oh and your answer is so incredibly boring I don't even know where to begin.
There are a variety of reasons that I must answer this "My Girlfriend" not the least of which is that she knows where I sleep.
Somehow I doubt your girlfriend would appreciate being appropriated as a sex slave.
... Unless she's into that kind of thing.
4. Who is your favorite poet and why?
Poet, huh?
Homer. Or Dante. Any other answer and you are provably wrong.
Good question. I'm going to answer Frost,
Yep.
5. Would you rather be well-paid or well-known as a writer?
Well-paid. Anyone who says otherwise is lying, Christ.
This is a morning splat. If you don't know the rules of morning splats it is that
Whoa hey I don't want to know about your "morning splat", man.
Sex slaves and morning splats.
Only on FLIRTING WITH PRETENTION.
Also Edie Finds a Corpse, apparently.
So to be clear, I am NOT talking about that.
Sorry I'm just reading what I want to read at this point. What are you talking about, exactly?
Now, with that said, I don't know what your situation is. I am aware of THREE people that have been diagnosed (not self-diagnosed) with clinical depression.
What does this have to do with what we were just talking about?
Too depressed to splat, I get it.
Statistically, I should know more. The APA and depression medication commercials disagree on exactly how common depression is (go figure) but it certainly seems to share a place with many disorders that have a massive industry of corrective meds in being both over and under diagnosed.
... If you had a sex slave would you even need to morning splat? I'd think you could just get her to help you out.
Sorry I'm getting really off topic now. Anyway, you were running your yap about shit no one cares about. Please, proceed.
All of the three I know are on medication and none really get offended when I talk about this stuff because it doesn't strike a nerve with them--because they KNOW it's not about them.
I imagine sex slaves are very depressed. Get her some medication you sadistic bastard.
I'd be a nice owner if nothing else, anyway.
(No one gets offended when an insult is absurd. It's only when there's some truth in the words that it starts to sting. More truth--more sting.)
I see what you mean. Gotta keep your pimp hand strong and all that.
To me, talking about a "mind/body connection" is like talking about a thigh/leg connection. The "mind" isn't really a thing.
Sorry I wasn't listening. I was practicing a Zen principle I discovered a few years back in the middle of critical theory class. I call it the "ten thousand voices make noise, not sense" principle. Sometimes it's what you don't say, man.
It's a concept--a cerebral concept that is incredibly ingrained in our culture.
So I guess you could argue that no one *technically* exists because we're all just vessels for shit we've seen and heard, and so therefore everyone is just the same thing in a slightly different order, huh.
LOOK HOW FUCKING LONG THIS POST IS JESUS CHRIST ALL MIGHTY.
Whenever my progressive friends start in on their social justice causes at a certain level, I always wonder where they've been in their lives.
You kind of topped yourself before with morning splat and sex slaves, man.
Texas is a different world--a whole different world.
OH YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME. I KNOW ALL ABOUT IT.
"Real" blogs- I think there's a trend away from LJ towards wordpress or some other kind of blogging tool because of the perception that LJ is somehow less credible.
Somehow. It can't be because it houses shit like this, no sir. I hope I've done all I can to make Livejournal seem less credible, too. Hooo, well. I have another blog to update now, but this one is for school so I won't use the word "cunt" as often.
It is, incidentally, not nearly as fun as this one.
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