Free Porn- Click Here!

I was told that if I wanted more readers I'd have to have more enticing titles to my entries, and what, pray tell, could be more enticing than FREE, FREE, FREE porn?
Maybe next entry should be FREE PENIS ENHANCING PILLS or something, idk.
So here we have a blog that's the antithesis of porn. In fact, it's probably the singular most convincing argument to stay celibate and a cloistered monk forever.
I kid, really, because I could easily say that about any blog I've ever read ever including this one.

I don't think I mentioned this but about two, maybe three weeks ago our ceiling in the kitchen started leaking.

Yeah and the FFXI party I was just in was beyond shit. We all have our own problems. If that doesn't seem like a fair comparison then you really don't know how shitty this party was, okay.
So to keep a really long story about a leaky roof short (it was really interesting so I'm doing an extreme disservice to you, dear readers possibly in search of free pornography in which case I just seriously misled you):

"No," he said. "The dripping." "F***. Did you call Dad?" He had and left a message.

F***. Whew, close one there, jean_yus. Whenever I see the word "fuck" written out in its entirety I immediately launch my monitor through the window and OH SHIT THERE IT GOES~

I have also misplaced my glasses and if you know where they are please tell me. I can't go into surgery (if I have a section) with my contacts in, and I can't see ANYTHING without some sort of optical aid.

They're in the black hole cavern (don't think too much about that) you call a twat. OH SHIT, ICED.
Also my transformation into a Cheetos-breathing cave troll with a cloud of stink and flies around me is officially complete because I can't think of the word "optical" without immediately thinking of the Optical Hat from FFXI, one of the best (?) headgear in the game.

Without fail, anytime I leave work for the day, if my boss sees me before I leave, she thanks me.

You know in all of my classes save poetry (where I just have a look of supreme disinterest) I get an audible "there he is!" from my peers. That's right, the party doesn't start without me.

That if ever you are in charge of other people, in any capacity, the simplicity of thanking them at the end of their tasks is incredibly gratifying. It has made me more loyal to my boss, my job, and given me pride in the work (which, of course, I can't tell you about) that I do.

"hey thanks for doing that thing I pay you to do." No, my "thanks" is in your paycheck, dearie.

I talked to the midwives about them a bit yesterday and she just said, "Well, it's good to know your body is preparing itself." Uh huh. It's great. I'm ecstatic. My cup runneth over.

Oh hey how about that? Pregnancy hurts and shit. Maybe you shouldn't get yourself knocked up so many times if you don't like all of that, what's it, hours and hours of painful labor that goes along with it.
Also being a midwife must be one of the most thankless jobs imaginable, holy Christ. You could not pay me enough to do that shit, mostly due to my intense dislike of my fellow man.

I had today off. I had a glorious nap while Kate had her nap. I haven't had a nap in like six weeks and I forgot how positively wonderful they are.

I haven't napped in 22 years. Feels good, man.

Well, if you were looking forward to scrambled eggs made by me for breakfast this morning, Im afraid you'll be disappointed. I walked into the cupboards with the bowl and spilled the entire lot of it on the not as clean as it ought to be Kitchen floor. Instead you will be treated to toasted english muffins with blueberry jam, straight from Alaska, made by Sis, a little tart for some but we seem to like and you should too.

Wow that's really awkward. Also you're right: I was looking forward to breakfast at your house over a month ago, somehow.

The husband is out playing video games with a buddy/boyfriend who's birthday is tomorrow.

Ha, ha burn. You just called your husband gay. I see what you did there.

Have you noticed that every time you start something, especially if it has to do with your health, if you mention it to people all of a sudden there are horror stories everywhere?

No. I keep stories about my health to myself unless it's something really awesome, like the time I stepped on a nail and it went all the way through my foot.
It didn't really, but that somehow sounds more painful. It did go all the way in, though, so this isn't some superficial pansy scratch. This was piercing damage, bros.

We're pregnant!

Goddamn I hate it when people say this. No, unless you're the queen, "we" aren't pregnant, *you* are pregnant.

Procreation may have very well ended at Eve if we all lived like that.

>implying Eve existed
Did you know if the tale of Eve is correct (it's not but let's just assume for a moment) every sexual relationship is, by definition, incest?
It's a good thing the Bible condones (or is at least ambivalent about) incest.

I am declaring here that I am officially opposed to days of work that make me contemplate deeper theologies, the decline of society, and other such things two hours after quitting time.

I never even contemplate these things when it's officially homework I have to do for a grade in class. I just write shit down then get a paper back 2 weeks later with "A++ would read again" written on it and can't remember writing it.

Uhm, learning Kristine's friend's nephew's name made me less hesitant to post the names we've picked.

Girl: Lauren
Boy: Bowie

Yeah, no middle names again. Deal with it.

Giving you a 5/10 on this assignment. While Lauren is a fine name, Bowie (as in David Bowie, musician) isn't. It's a last name. Cut that shit out.

See, I had a migraine Friday night. At 8:15 I took a Tylenol #3. I got a little loopy, as usual, but the pain wasn't so much gone.

>Tylenol 3
>has codeine
>pregnant
hmmm.

Had my first midwife appointment today. They took gallons of blood, my blood pressure and my history. We tried to listen for the heart but alas, it doesn't have one. Or it's too little to hear. Whichever makes you feel better.

"No heart beat" makes me feel better, thanks.

So when my baby sitter handed me Twilight I took it and thought, "Hopefully I'll get to it in an acceptable time." I took it because it's a book and I'm a book hound. If you hand it to me and say it's good I'll at least give it a crack and see how it goes.

Anyway, I did open it and have been reading it. I'm probably 300 pages or so in. It's a light read. It's not taking much brain power. It's engaging enough, pulls me along and I'm totally happy to let Blair play his video games while I read. I think it's well written enough.

Hey thanks. It is my best seller, don't you know.
Well I think my work here is done. I'm going to leave you with my final thoughts on my FFXI party today:
It's a complex emotion.

Oh what

I know I often bitch that these asshole bloggers prattle on for entirely too long (not the least bit hypocritical, I know) and if I had to dredge up a compliment about this blog, it would probably be that she keeps her posts an appropriate length. Unfortunately... That's about all you can say about it.

I don't really know what school work I'm supposed to be doing,

when the school DIDN'T GET MY WORK READY WHEN I WENT TO GO
GET IT TODAY. YOU'RE FUCKING COOL VALLEY VIEW.
I can't wait for college, I'll be on my own (:

Yeah you're in for a surprise. MY COLLEGE DIDN'T GET MY HOMEWORK READY FOR ME IT'S THEIR FAULT. Yeah they don't really give a shit.

I really need need need to get drunk.
my dad HAS to be leaving soon right?
comeeeee onnn please leaveee sooon.


Oh man, I might as well say don't call
then maybe you'll call.

Ha, ha, oh what?

I can't believe you're 20 years old today.
it drives me crazy. You act like you're 17.

Ha, ha, wow huge difference. I CAN'T BELIEVE I JUST TURNED 22! I STILL ACT LIKE I'M 21!

I wonder what it would be like if we were
still together.. and you turning 20. hmm.
I'm glad I turned you down again.. I feel powerful
over you. I knwo that's mean, but I feel
like I got you wrapped around my finger,

Yeah this is real interesting and all, but what?

well this is unfortunate.

something's fishy. NOT LIKING IT.

It's your cunt. Ho, ho, ho.

" Make me smile.."

"... no."

I smile.

" See, I made you smile."

" You're an asshole."

:|

I broke down today. like legitimately.
I studied chemistry 6pm to 3am.

Maybe should have thought about studying before the day before of the test idk--

FAILED. 68%. i had 3 tests, when I saw my grade,
i broke down, Kilker actually felt bad.

Maybe it's just the failure of a high school I came from but that's passing.
Except for one semester where they eliminated the D but then everyone got bottom sore and they brought it back.

and I've been crying since, like
everything i do anymore in school is wrong.
what happened to me?

Goddamn high school kids are dumb. Study harder and this won't happen, Christ.
Glad I graduated and am definitely not majoring in a subject that will cause me to return to high school for any reason-- oh.

these are the times
where i wish i was still unstable, in the hospital,
actually having time to catch up on work, and not have to
worry about shit like this, where all I have to worry about is
spending time with friends and family, not this fucking bullshit.

:3

alg2 can kiss my ass.
i got a stupid asss progress report
FIRST PROGRESS REPORT SINCE EVERRRRRR.
a 75 FUCKIGN AVERAGE IN ALG2.
GROUNDED FOR IT.
YOU K NOW THROUGH HIGHSCHOOL SO FAR,
I HAVEN'T EVEN SHOWED MY DAD REPORT CARDS...
CAUSE ITS POINTLESS BECAUSE I GET
GOOD GRADES... SO I NEVER SHOW HIM.. .
NOW... I HAVE TO SHOW HIM EVERYTHING,
BECAUSE OF THAT STUPID BITCH. I can't take it.


THIS YEAR WILLL BE THE DEATH OF ME.
Then tar decides to say, Riley will help you,
'cause riley got a 102 in that class....

Here was the face I was making through this entire thing:
Really, what's there to say about this? I probably picked a bad blog to review because all I have to do is quote it and say "WELL!?" accusingly.

I cried today in Chem.
Kilker wasn't explaining anything to me.
Since I was absent no lcue what to do.
I finally get it, after crying the whole class.
and all he was saying was " There's no crying in chemistry."

Ha, ha destroyed.

Like I am crying over the fact that I could careless about school
right now, 'cause i would like to care.

What

btw, who gives homework
every fuckin' night?

What

So get this everyone! Mike's exgirlfriend and her friend we're being immature and posting stupid status, about me... WOO! awesome. IT GETS BETTER.... MIKES EX'S FRIEND... IS OBSESSED WITH ANTHONY. .......... IS THERE EVER A TIME WHERE I'M NOT AWAY FROM THAT DOUCHEBAG?

OH FUCK. Mike's ex said WHAT about you? Uh-uh, girlfriend. I don't think so!
And on FACEBOOK (presumably) no less! Why, to ignore this onslaught of trolling you'd have to, I don't know, close your internet browser!

I don't know what he sees in me, But I'm happy he's happy.
now he's with me, I'm freaking out, because I'm just so lucky.
cause he's everything I asked for.

I predict good things for this happy couple.

I feel like I'm so young... BUT I'M NOT. I'm gettin' old.

greenlexluthor.jpg is so last week (literally).

Lol at my life,
I'm such a idiot. Hahaha.
really.

>a idiot
I think I'm going to end on this note, actually, because this summarizes my thoughts about this blog perfectly.

Oh

Hi.
I found this. I still quit, by the way.
It's called "We live in an aischroletreian society..." Which is a word I have never heard before. I looked it up, and my dictionary suggested it wasn't even a word, which considering how difficult it is to pronounce I'm not surprised, but a quick googling confirms it's some recent coinage by some French asshole. Supposedly it means "a society that worships the nasty and the foul" which is to say any society ever.
People do enjoy their dirt and gossip, and why not?
I think our boy here might be some kind of Junior Bill O'Reilly (or my new favorite NEIL BORTZ [seriously that's his name] but I doubt anyone outside of bumfuck, NC is familiar with him or he might be nationally syndicated I don't really know). At the bare minimum he's very angry about stuff and to be honest I'm not really sure why. I mean it's one thing if you're angry at something that affects your life like THE FUCKING TRAFFIC or such like, but he seems to mostly be angry at a bunch of bullshit.

I haven't really read nor taken seriously anything from HuffPo when it was very clear that last year they became the worst of the worst Obama-ass-licking morons in the blogosphere.

The second the term "blogosphere" comes up outside of the "I'm going to make fun of this word and any douche that uses it" context I think you're taking yourself far, far too seriously.
The blogosphere. Great.
The article he linked is admittedly douchey, but come on, man. It's about some "racist" Halloween costumes for dogs including shit like the "Chinese geisha" (geisha aren't Chinese but whatever I'll roll) and the "Spanish bandito" (banditos aren't Spanish but okay).

Racist? You think a human dressing up as a geisha or pimp for Halloween would make you "probably die a little death"? Holy fuck on a stick, it's "disgrasians" (how apropos) like this that make me HATE one half of myself very, very verily.

Whoa, what? Looking up "disgrasians"-- I'm watching you, now. That's the second time in like five minutes I've looked up a word I don't know (already alerts are going off in my head, because I know every word that's real) and my dictionary doesn't have an entry for them.
All right, googling.
Google doesn't return with anything that makes sense, and a Google image search brings me pictures of some Asians (disgrASIANs I see what you did there, Google) and a picture of Rihanna. All right.

Fuck you, you bunch of lefty PC retards from Hell. While you fucking sit there are bitch and moan about how RACIST!!11111111 it is to dress a dog up in a pretty asian silk jacket, you're ignoring the REAL racism that's out there,

I'd like to point out, gang, that we're up in arms about dog costumes. DOG COSTUMES.

I'm sick of hearing about Jon and Kate.

"So let me make a 500 word post about it."
Also I really haven't heard that much outside of "he cheated and they're getting divorced and she's a turbocunt but he's a putz so they're right for each other." Which admittedly knowing anything about them is too much because who the fuck are Jon and Kate? She had six kids (at once, plus a previous set of twins hence "plus eight" in their show title), whoop-de-shit.

But then Jon became a complete and total douchebag, whoring around with all of those younger women and leaving behind his litter with his bitchy wife. Which I wouldn't blame him for, EXCEPT that instead of taking time off and laying low and relaxing, he behaved like a 17-year-old ghetto ASSHOLE, schmoozing it up with Christian Audigier/Ed Hardy and all of that crap (which basically ruined Ed Hardy for me--something that even *Kevin Federline* could not do!).

Oh no, how will "Ed Hardy" (who?) survive without your approval?
Now here's an entry entitled "Another reason why allthingsdog is superior to dog_lovers." At first I considered sparing you, the readers, the details of this fascinating post but then I decided that would be pretty cruel. After all, I'm sure you were burning for yet more proof that "allthingsdog" is indeed superior to "dog underscore lovers".

This idiotic/myopic commentary coming from the racist moron who once referred to his dog's "oriental eyes".

I had no idea dog lovers (presumably platonic love and not the kind of love I saw a documentary about once) were such ardent racists. Or, possibly, "racially prejudiced" as one of my classes recently informed me only white people can be racist. I didn't agree, but I don't have my PhD in whatever-the-fuck so I don't know.

What is your dream job? Do you think you'll ever have it?

Vampire hunter. Or witch hunter. Or inquisitor.
Also: no.

I have my dream job, if I want it. I do like graphic design and I'm good at it.

Ha, ha you have a dumb dream job.

I hate modern music. I want to stab the asshole who invented the vox and other computer-generated crap that producers layer onto girls' vocals in all music these days.

Aww but "vox" is one of the coolest words in any language. It's Latin for "voice", don't you know.

I don't know who the fuck came up with the idea that 9/9/09 should be a day without cats on the internet, but whoever it was needs to die in a fire. They apparently got CuteOverload to go along with it. What the fuck? What's with the cat hate?

I usually reserve my wishes for someone to die in screaming agony in a house fire for serious events but I guess people who want to go one solitary day without an "ironically funny" picture of a cat with "hilariously" misspelled words underneath do invite that much raw emotion.
Before anyone suggests she (?) is doing that to be funny, I'd like to point out this post goes on for FOUR paragraphs.

How do I get this guy off of my fucking channel? Seriously, because I can't stand that he's there, on right after Victoria's show, sullying any semblance of compassion (and intelligence) that Animal Planet has.

...

AWW FUCK THAT GUY, FUCK THAT GUY! SULLYING THE GOOD NAME OF ANIMAL PLANET!
I also love it when people refer to something as "theirs". No, unless you're the CEO of Animal Planet (or more likely its parent company, Viacom or Disney or some shit) then no, it isn't *your* Animal Planet.

fucking adopters
dumping dogs off at shelters
make me want to KILL.

Chelle's such a whiner
no HP in IMAX yet
she threw a tantrum.

still so hot in here
and computer running slow
someone just kill me.

...

Ha, ha funny you should call someone a whiner. Although I guess you aren't whining so much as a raging psychotic, hmm.

[

mood

|

ifuckingrate

]

Hollywood SUCKS THE BIG FUCKING SHIT-COVERED DONKEY COCK.

Not only did they completely fuck up the ending for Life on Mars, but adding salt to the wound the writers implied that one of the Obama children would be president in the future (LOL, yeah, okay, like that would ever happen).

k

There are many reasons why I don't talk politics with some people these days. One big reason was the Election Season this past year. People far too often accuse me of "being butthurt" over Clinton's loss to Obama, but

Stop. Yes you are.

said same people's eyes are too awash with OBAMA HOPE that they can't fucking stop the stupid ad hominem bullshit for a moment and look at WHY PUMAs are PUMAs.

Ha, ha oh what?
So I think that's it. I'm going to go do something else. Starting to get a headache.

Special 200th post spectacular!

Who would have guessed this would have held my interest for 200th posts? Certainly not I!
With that said, though, this is my last entry. Seriously. Maybe.
And what better way to celebrate than with what has brought me so much fortune, acclaim and readers? Especially that last part, oh ho. Actually especially the first part, too, but especially the second part.
So here we have Guillo, he's some kind of something.

I got an A on my English paper last week. Which is amazing cause I wrote the paper in like 5 hours the night before it was due because I spent 2 weeks playing Aion.

:|

Anyways, I'm excited cause it's my first paper that the professor has told me that it was great and he told me that in front of class which boosted my ego. :D

:|

Here it is

http://docs.google.com/Doc?docid=0AXXgYf-acStAZGRidGhwMmdfMTR4bXhmbTdkdw&hl=en

I didn't think it was super great cause of the time it took me to write it, maybe my professor was drunk when he graded my paper.

Oh, what? Posting your homework to your blog, okay.
Let's see-- oh, well, right off the bat in any English class I've taken sentences such as:

This is another part of the current healthcare system that saddens me.

would have instantaneously failed you. It's an unsubstantiated opinion with no relevance to anything, but mostly because you used a first person pronoun.

Dominicans in Japan.

Nope not reading this.

Last night Japanese class was good. Of course, I was supposed to learn the #s 1-10 and I did not study so I was a lame ass in class. I did super well in the Kore/Sore/Are part.

Derp derp.
You're not going to make it, bro. That's Japanese 101 and you're already fucking up hard and missing basic grammar assignments.

Maybe going to Japan is a bad idea. That's just asking for me to get arrested for trying to rape a sumo wrestler.

What is this I don't even
Why would you want to rape a sumo wrestler?

OMFG JU GAIS!!!!!!

:|
:|
:|
Now he posts pictures of his Aion character which I wager looks strikingly similar to how he looks (sans gray skin, red eyes and wings of course) in real life. That is, morbidly obese with a neckbeard.
Also thanks for answering conclusively whether or not I should try Aion. That answer, by the way, is a resounding "no".

Beyonce is the most amazing woman ever. I love her.

Hi I added a picture of Kanye West for humorous effect.

Japanese class was awesome last night.
My pronunciation frakin' rocks.

But does your grammar rock?
Considering your English grammar is of inferior quality, I somehow kind of doubt it.

The problem I have is that I freeze when attention is on me. So when I had to stand up and talk to another person I kinda get weird.

Last night a girl had to introduce me to her friend.

No you freeze because you have to talk to girls because you have NO GAME.
It went something like this.

Kochira Kono wa Suzuki wo to Debura san desu. kochira kono wa Honda wo to Waito san desu.

Hi just upgrading your grammar.

That's all I had to say. I might have the particle "wo" wrong but I don't have my notes on me.

No you definitely did. Also if you pronounced it "whoa" your pronunciation is as poor as your grammar.

Conor and I think the class is going a bit slow. The Teacher explains stuff way too long and he goes off into space with stuff.

Apparently not long enough when it comes to basic elements like the difference between an object marker and the conjunction "and".

I'm wearing a sweater vest, so I am looking super cute.

Heh, heh, heh.

So we get there and we kinda hope for a woman teacher cause women are cute when speaking Japanese I think.

Unless they're ugly, then it's not so cute.
Naturally.

I am here eating lunch at work. Hot boys around.

Maybe this is a girl, I don't know. She (?) posted her first name: Guillermo. I could Google it and find out but that would spoil the mystery. Let's take bets and I'll Google it at the end and we'll have a conclusive (hopefully) answer.
I'm still going to work under the assumption that this is a gay guy.

can you say SQUEEEEEEE!!!

In light of this evidence I think one could make a strong case for this being a girl, but there still isn't enough conclusive evidence yet. I'm standing firm on this.
All right mystery over he posted a lot of pictures of himself.
I was correct on every single account by the way because I'm pro like that.

This has to be one of the greatest stand up comedy acts in the history of history. The execution, the ending, the build up to know what "the phrase" is.

Dane Cook at his best ladies and gentlemen

>Dane Cook
>one of the greatest stand up comedy acts
Last entry I'm serious.
Wait maybe all the pictures of that morbidly obese gentleman weren't of the author.
Goddamn this blog is confusing.
No, wait, it is. There are a couple fat guys that I've seen pictures of from this blog, okay, so it's very hard to follow.
Now I've gone through 3 years of entries. Most of them were pictures at one time but are now missing.
Cool blog, bro.
Well I best be doing some shit for class tomorrow or something. I seem to recall a long, rambling speech and then some kind of assignment on Tuesday so I better search deep into my soul to discover the assignment which turns out is written on the Mona Lisa like in invisible ink like the latest Dan Brown bestseller or some shit.
So anyway last entry.
Maybe.
No, really, it is.
Maybe.

:V

Oh boy, today.
I didn't think you could enjoy Guyver and Persona 3 and still turn out a cunt, but surprise, surprise.
This blog along with the entire career of Carlos Santana has me near a breakthrough with how douchebaggery works. See, Santana has this uncanny power to turn any douche (c.f. that song he did with Michelle Branch and also that song with the lead singer of Nickelback [more like Nickelgay]) into something halfway presentable, but this blog appears to have the inverse power.
I am intrigued by the potential, here.
So this girl-- apparently married another girl.
Holy mother of God this is a man.
What do?
Okay, let's play this cool.

I DARE any of you to have a wedding as awesome as mine was. If you missed it, you'll just have to go to your grave knowing that you missed the PERFECT wedding, and you'll never see its like. If you were there, you may thank me in the comments.

Perhaps you can see why, in this quote, I thought it was a girl. Seriously, wedding shit? Really, bro?

Actually, I should thank you. Thanks to everyone who could make it and to everyone who wasn't. You're a part of this crazy love story between two kids who first talked to each other in a Final Fantasy 7 RP chat room.

I wish I had the linguistic skill to type the noise I just made and have it make sense. Unfortunately I do not, so imagine a noise halfway between a groan and a chuckle.

We first met in person at Otakon. I was cosplaying Wolfwood from Trigun.

Heh, heh, heh.
Oh my, no.
Now he's talking about the books he read this year (a whopping two, congrats bro) one of which is Starship Troopers, one of the classics and the grandfather of giant robot fiction. Even if you disagree with the author's admittedly Republican view of war (implying war is good, what), it's hard to deny the contributions he made to one of the greatest triumphs of human imagination (giant robots).
There was a shitty movie made in the early 2000s that I can only summarize by saying "it's basically homogenized pap for fat Americans" but our boy has this to say:

In a lot of ways, the movie is better than the book. If you just want a story with only a hint of dystopia, you can watch the movie and not have to deal with the crap from the book. If sociology is more your thing, and you want a lecture on the cost-benefits of an entire society based around its all volunteer army, then the book is for you.

What. I think the whole "wow this is kind of a downer" was the point of the book, way to miss it.
IF YOU WANT TO DISPENSE WITH ALL THAT PESKY THINKING, THE MOVIE IS THE WAY TO GO. Tool.

The book is thought provoking (even if you're like me and didn't agree with it at all) but gets pretty boring in parts.

Way to just barely step around the pitfall of "I DON'T GET IT, NO STARS" only to fall flat into "I DISAGREE WITH THE PHILOSOPHY OF THE BOOK, NO STARS".

2) you roleplay, and sometimes your characters seem to wind up really deep and elaborate. do you always get a chance to play all that out in-game, or is it more just a secret history between you and your character?
It honestly depends on the character. For my Final Fantasy XI character, most of it actually has been role played.

>Roleplaying
>FFXI
Holy mother of fuck you're that dickbag that takes five minutes to pull a crab because you have to roleplay your motivation, don'tcha?
I have only had the intense misfortune of playing with your ilk twice, and needless to say it gives me pause for thought before any invitation I accept.

His depth came from many, many hours of actual in-game role play. Reinbach started out as kind of a vague concept and grew into a character with his own psychology and realistic motivations through role play.

Uh-huh. Here's my character's motivation: "I better not suck or my subscription will be cancelled."

He has taken a few tweaks here and there that took place internally, but for the most part, Reinbach kind of grew up in real time.

Cool story.
Oh, hey, your character's name is Reinbach. SHOW ME YOUR KUNG FU.
You are on the Lakshmi server so I've never personally had the dubious honor of being in a party with you, but based off your FFXIAH profile you are a level 70 corsair/ 31 red mage--
wait, 70/31? LEVEL YOUR SUBJOB, GIMP.
Complex character motivations indeed. Apparently not deep enough to keep your subjob properly leveled. (brotip: your level should read to me like this: 70 COR/35 RDM)

3) pokemon trading at the wedding. yes or no?

I didn't know ten year olds got married in civilized nations.

Mein Komputer ist tot.

Ich finde deine Blog sehr Möse.
I don't know if that's right because I haven't had German in like five or six years.

The other one is called (Stephen King fans are going to love this) Graff. It's a malted, slightly hopped apple cider.

:V
What
oh I get it. Yeah, all right, you. Graff was the devil from the ten billion+ page waste of time entitled The Stand.

Kat and I are putting figures of Gendo Ikari and Rei Ayanami on our wedding cake
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 9

Is this awesome y/n?

I don't know, putting anime figures on your wedding cake? I'm going to have to go with a resounding "what the fuck" but whatever, not my fucking wedding. Personally I'd try to convince the bitch it's better to put all that money towards a house or something but that's just me.

Dear Internet,

I just got my car broken into.

Please post amusing pictures to cheer me up.

Sincerely,
Me

Dear Dickbutt,

No.

Love,

Tim.

Well I think the time is nigh to do something else. It has indeed been real, dickbutt. Might I suggest blogging less and leveling your subjob more? I'm sure the miserable sons of bitches in your parties would appreciate it.

Super Barf IV

Not too much to brag about this time around. Finally got my Warlock's Gloves in FFXI, which I probably should have had 20+ levels ago on RDM but whatever +1o parrying and +4 dexterity weren't exactly high on my "list of items to acquire". Still, feels good having the complete set. Besides, it's always a plus to have a character that looks like a red version of the Three Musketeers. As Char from Gundam said, "only an ace would go to battle in that color."
Speaking of just took about a 3 hour break to get all the Halloween event items. Treat Staff II awww yeah.
Uhh... Oh yeah.

I just talked to my father on the phone for over 17 minutes. That has got to be a new record.
Unfortunately, it was mostly about complications in dealing with my grandfather's estate. My poor Pop is having to deal with a ton of crap, in addition to his already-stressful job. He's the executor of my grandfather's will, so apparently there is a lot of stuff only he can do.

Yeah, hence "executor". If it was shit anyone could do it wouldn't be called that.

I stayed up until 3am last night. I woke up a couple times, but the final time was at 9am this morning, to get to my 10am doctor's appointment.

So what? I did that shit just yesterday and indeed do it two times a week. Big fucking deal.

The waiting room filled with pregnant teenaged mothers and their small children. And the TV playing cartoons. I mentioned this was a planned parenthood, right? And the icy receptionist behind the inch-thick glass wall, who give me all the forms back on which I only checked "yes" to the things that applied to me, and left everything else blank instead of checking "no" for each ailment I've never had, which was most of them. Grrrr. I had to check each "no" and hand the forms back in.

Oh no checking all the items off on a form is really fucking difficult and frustrating. I WAS INCONVENIENCED FOR, LIKE, FIFTEEN SECONDS I BETTER BLOG ABOUT THIS! Goddamn.

And wait. And wait. The visit was not off to a good start. Thank good I had brought my knitting with me, or I would have gotten seriously pissy, rather than just irritated.

Yes, praise be to good.

I got lucky and really like the therapist I got paired with. I was a little nervous about him at first. An Asian man with a mustache would probably not be my first pick, but it turned out fine.

Toshiro Mifune?
Oh, what, it's not like many Asians can grow facial hair, so I figured my choices were pretty much limited.

He said some sort of touchy-feely, new agey things, but he did so in such a way that my inner cynic was not put off by it.

YOUR KUNG FU IS WEAK.
Okay here's a health report. This is good, I have been wanting to read this.
Wow, no, not reading this.
Here's another.

That was a tiny huzzah, to celebrate the fact that I feel pretty good today, and am feeling optimistic about getting better!

Great thanks for fucking my font up.

I do still have a troublesome feeling of fluid in my throat and lungs, that makes me want to cough. I have been trying to resist the urge to cough, because it will most likely make make gag and possibly throw up.

:V

So, just for the sake of record keeping, I hereby report that I just barfed again.

Thanks for the update.

Fuck. What the fuck!? Now I have a fever again. Not a high fever, just 99.1, but enough that I noticed I felt feverish and took my temperature.

98.2 is normal for humans, so this barely, barely fucking counts.

And I am in a big argument with myself, because one seems more valid than the other. If I am sick, then that's a legitimate excuse to be "lazy" and "not do anything." But the doctor I saw today seemed to think I wasn't that sick. But if I am depressed, then I should snap out of it, get my ass in gear and get back to work already...?

Holy fuck.

My mom called and woke me up at around 9 this morning. She suggested that I go to Santa Cruz today to see the family or something. I don't want to go. It's probably very selfish of me, but

Okay multiple choice question time. Does she say:
A. she's sick
B. she's tired
C. she's pregnant
D. she has to go to church and Christfag it up
E. all of the above
Well if you picked E you suck at multiple choice tests because it's almost never all of the above. The correct answer, of course, was A. Or B. I'd take either.

My mom passed on an idea that came from my uncle who is a doctor: I might have whooping cough, or pertussis.

PERTUSSIS WOW WHAT A MEDICAL KNOWLEDGE!
That's like when I was reading the guide to the Halloween event in FFXI today I came across this brilliant line:
" Utilizing different npcs after obtaining an item seems to expedite (speed up) the process of obtaining items."
Thanks. Expediate = speed up. Got it.

There is a whooping cough vaccine, which I received as a baby... I have the records. But it wears off after ten or fifteen years. So most adults are theoretically walking around susceptible to it, but it's been mostly wiped out, so it's not that big a deal.

:3
then it comes back 500 times worse because no one has a natural immunity to it anymore.

While I was writing this, I coughed and then threw up a little bit. I think it's getting worse.

Fantastic (translator's note: fantastic means good)

Just FYI,

Okay I need to be paying attention, because this is an FYI (for your information)

Today (10/9) was the 18th day of me being sick.
I barfed for the first time on 9/30, although I had been coughing to gagging before that.
I have barfed 5 times since then, so about 5 times in ten days.
The vomiting started after I started the antibiotics, but seems to be getting worse, more frequent, and appears to be continuing after the last dose of the antibiotics.

I really need to hear about this.

OMG I just threw up AGAIN. Three times! What the fuck is going on?! I am definitely calling a doctor tomorrow.

YES THANK YOU CAN I PLEASE HEAR YET MORE?

This fucking blows (no pun intended.)

Heh, heh-- oh what?

I haz a scanner!

:|
Now here's a picture of her grandfather, and he looks kind of like a Jewish version of Lee Van Cleef.
Probably the coolest person in her family by virtue of that fact alone, but of course he's dead, so no chance at anything cool from this blog now.

Except for about half and hour ago, I decided to stop just trying to ignore the voices scolding me, and actually deal with them. I asked myself why I wasn't doing anything today.

Voices in your head, huh. I usually call these persistent images and voices in my head "thoughts" but all right I'll roll with it.
Unless you're actually hearing voices that aren't there, which given your previous entries is entirely possible. You do seem nuts.

Good news:

You vomited!

I have nothing to report!

Oh. Darn.

In generally I have been feeling much better physically, although I still feel like there is mucus in my lungs that I periodically have to try to expel, with mixed results that range from nothing happening to vomiting.

FUCK. Spoke too soon.

The bad news... I mean, more bad news: I barfed again today.

All right time to wrap this shit up. It has been real. Real dumb.
I guess if I had to summarize my feelings for this blog in image form it'd probably be this one:All right. Until Monday. Try not to vomit~ :3

You are a stupid cunt who should die of AIDS

So today I think we have some kind of boy or girl or something. Maybe it's both. A perfect hermaphrodite. Get ready for some totally awesome (XD) emoticons, because they're coming. Oh boy, are they coming.

Midterm on monday for Nutrition. got 9 chapters to skim through i think... maybe I'll be fine about it, I duon. meeting with Caitilin to work on internship paper. Uncle will arrive in 1-2 hours... then we should see.

Real interesting, friend.
DROVE TO CLASS TODAY
IT WAS RAINING
GOT MY JOURNAL BACK (not what you think, believe me I wouldn't willingly keep a diary)
INTERESTING FOR YOU YET, READERS?

had a REALLY nice nap today- almost 3 hours after my 1st class.

HOLY SHIT YES, INTERESTING NAP! WOOOOOO THANKS FOR THAT UPDATE OH MAN!
Sorry if this comes off as particularly contemptuous you can probably chalk it up to jealousy because guess who hasn't been sleeping too well lately? Oh hi it's me.

in the mean time, I was watching..... BLEACH. no surprise, huh?

Bleach! 241!! GAH! WHYWHYWHY!!!! >O< ...at least there's Kazeshini *sniffles* I'm glad that he's pretty cool or I might gut myself someday. does that count as spoiler? I don't really think so cuz... its like saying Ichigo's in a bleach episode since he's the main character? someone kill me now if that's a spoiler. :/

I DONT get why the school don't give us heating. Really guys? its 11 or 4 C now!!

My current GPU temperature: 48C. When it's cold I just hang out by my computer. Feels good, man.

...still have not given up the skytides rp but I really need to finish work first before considering. @_@ well. at least live through october. :O and play through FFVII so i can try as Cid Highwind. though if that dont work out... I really duno who else to do LOL.

What? I've played through Final Fantasy 7 a couple times, okay, and I have no fucking clue what any of this means. I guess he's going to play through so he can roleplay as one of the characters (nerd) or write a fanfic (ugh) or something.

friend from taiwan? *sigh* she's visiting boston and with her here it kinda screwed over most of my plans for the weekend. ah well. i can deal... D: just irritated, abit. :/

Let me see if I understand this correctly.
You have a girl visiting you all the way from Taiwan, and your first thought isn't "she's totally into me, I could so hit that," but "WOW THIS SURE MESSES UP MY VIDEO GAME SCHEDULE!"
Okay, man. Your life.

Halloween costumes? was pokin' round today but... WHY oh WHY are all teh girl costumes so... slutty? 'cute'!? isent halloween suppose to be RAWR! FEAR ME, I LOOK SPOOKYYYYY? hm. gotta try on the batgirl costume--

Oh this is a girl. All right. I guess I pegged Final Fantasy fanfiction as the activity of lonely neckbeards but I do suppose girls play Final Fantasy now. Not the good ones like 6 or anything, the faggy ones like, I don't know-- 8.

it was nice but that dress is DAYMN SHORT. O_O gona freeze!! T__T. THAT would be my backup plan, I guess. It's freakishly expensive too... D: nearly bought a toy rifle, though. its 35$ which was the main reason I put it back but.... ITS HUGE!! ITS SO COOL!!! O__O like sniper wolf? but not quite? XD

Christ.

I still FAIL at video games, btw. D:

>girl
>failing at video games
Also if I understand your video game playing correctly it's mostly Metal Gear Solid and Final Fantasy. Brotip for beating these games: watch the cutscene, use the summons, respectively.
Unless it's FFXI, then you definitely don't want to use the summons, oh no.

Today Falcon's have a team practice. it was pouring . it was cut short. (thank god for small miracles.) I STILL love quidditch, but next time, even if its freakin' freezing? I'm going in SHORTS. long pants in the mud = HELL FUCKING NO. @_@

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought Quidditch was a fictional game in the Harry Potter universe. Am I completely off my ass?
Now she bitches about a class called game development, where-- well, look at this:

WHY AM I THE SECRETARY IF I SUCK WITH TECHNOLOGY!? (why am I the secretary when I cant spell to save my life!? WHY am i in gamedev when I cannot seem to play video games!?!?!?!?!)

So you're bad at video games (don't need to be good at them to make them but whatever you are an idiot) and you're bad at technology. What business, exactly, do you have in a class like that?

ok. done ranting. XD. don't get me wrong. I LOVE gamedev. XD just stressed. this is not mentioning the hw I have piled up for social psychology, ethics and justice, principles of PR, and nutrition. don't mind me~

now i'm gona go level grind on FFVii on pc so I MIGHT get to CID part so I can research for skytides~ XD

XD count: 3

gona stop rambleing and start workin on the gamedev things. :D i feel improtant aha. XD

:|

SKYTIDES! stlil researching! gona be Cid Highwind if possible. :D. FFVII got to Arith bit. :O will Level grind until AL gets back so she can help @_@.

>Arith
It's "Aeris", chief.
Also that's literally within the first hour. That'd be like me saying WHEW TURNED FFXI ON, GUYS. CONGRATULATIONS TO ME.
Uh oh I seem to be having trouble going back further I guess the entry is over-- oh it loaded.
Great.

i live! yay! ihop's crazy... O_O
texas is freaking HOT!

TEXAS.
This explains so much.

crashed into gamedev VP today. apparently i look 'sad' --;; i was just not as HYPER or ENERGETIC as normal (HIHI!! RUNNING ON 3.5HRS of sleep here!?).

Mother of a fuck you are annoying.
I couldn't give three fucks about four fucks when it comes to your fanfiction or any of your finals or classes. It'd be one thing if any of this shit changed from day to day, but it's just the same entry over and over with slightly different emotes. Seriously, goddamn how long does it take to beat Final Fantasy VII? The game came out like twelve years ago or some shit.
It has been said that the sign of a good writer is someone who can make a boring subject interesting. Well there it is. Boring subject = still boring. Good work, all.

Heh

I think it's some sort of irony when someone defines themselves as literate (in the title of their cunt blog no less) and then proceeds to use the word "theirself" in the title of a post.
Speaking of, I started reading this blog yesterday (unrelated to this project, this guy isn't a complete tool factory and has talent, something I'm sure everyone I've reviewed here would be unfamiliar with). It was so weird to see proper spelling and grammar and shit, but it was a little awkward in places. I wondered what the deal was but OH WAIT HE'S FRENCH CANADIAN OR SOME SHIT.
So there it is, assholes. People who don't even speak English as a native language speak it better than you do. You are barely functioning human beings.

What the hell..
So I guess he changed his mind and is ok with seeing me or something..
However, doesn't want anyone to know because I'm a girl and he's not really into girls.

What.

How on earth did I get into this position and furthermore, why do I like him so much?
Is a relationship like this even possible of functioning on some sort of normal level?

Ugh, I need to do homework and forget about this right now.

Short answer: no.
Also it's glad to see people are still really fucking gullible, because this Wednesday I am going to enact a plan so incredibly genius I can't even believe it.

It's been a little while and I've had some frustration building up.

I just don't understand why it's so hard to find a decent guy..

All right check this out, okay. Here's my plan.
So last... Thursday (day before a break, hurray) everyone wished each other a happy break and all that shit.
Well on Saturday, October 10 my dog died (everyone was very sad ;_;). Sunday was my birthday, baby. OH THE HUMANITY.
Holy shit I just gotta whip that one out when one of the professors asks how our break was and bam all the bitches will be all over me, goddamn.
Considering I'm in the education department which is 99% bitches and fags I'm already somewhat of a novelty, so this is perfect. NOTHING CAN GO WRONG.
Oh right, back to you.

You know, one that's cute, has good taste in music, appreciates art, doesn't do coke or hit his girlfriends, isn't a redneck, isn't gay, isn't a compulsive liar, is capable of being self-sufficient, has educational goals, doesn't live at home with mom and dad, is open-minded, is adventurous and spontaneous, doesn't cling to me, but rather complements me, has a car and can hold a job.
(obviously based off that list, I've had some bad luck in meeting guys lately)

You sure are picky, Christ. So I gotta compliment you (with an i and not an e) but I can't be clingy (not really sure what these thoughts have to do with each other, really)? Goddamn you sure are needy. I can shorten this paragraph to a single sentence: "I'm looking for a guy that'll put up with all my bullshit." There it is.

I need to get over this and just focus on me. Do my thing and ignore all of these other people.
Especially him...
I made the mistake of getting involved with a co-worker.
I'm dumb, I know.

You are a dumb.
Also I like the implication of focusing on others, which is clearly a lie.

I've discovered that I am happiest when I feel like I have purpose. When I have someone to devote all of my love to.

I WANT A GUY THAT ISN'T CLINGY BUT OH LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEE, I'M MRS. CLINGY!

Sooo, I'm drinking it. I just want to become numb and fall asleep.

I'm sure I had something to say about this but right now I'm listening to Comfortably Numb.

I wish I knew what brought on this sudden depression I'm feeling. It's probably a combination of multiple things which are filling up the bottle I have inside me.

I know the first thing I'd be feeling if I had a bottle inside me (besides ass pained [literally], because I'm guessing that's where it goes): concerned.

And here are: "What is it called when a person has conversations with theirself?"

Theirself. Themselves. Also it's called "stone cold fuck nuts".
That's a medical term, by the way.

I had an unbelieveably amazing night with this "interest" of mine, but it will never be what I'd like it to be. Perhaps he has something to teach me? There must be a reason that we've met. Time will tell.

Girls are dumb

I think I'm starving and I can no longer think.

So you're having a thought that you can no longer think?
Shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit. I wish I had some drugs to figure that one out.

Its my birthday.
I've only drank 3 beers.
I have to work a double tomorrow.
Then I've been ordered to go straight to McHenry's without changing.
WTF?
I think they are going to bake me a cake.
I am excited.
I got sang to on the patio.
YAY!
We have SOOO much beer in the fridge.
I want people to come over tomorrow toooooo.
<3

Sure is some passive fucking voice in this post, goddamn. All I got from this: things happened to someone.

Sex and the City (the movie) has been on a lot lately and no matter what else is on, I always seem to watch it. I think I like torturing myself. I wish I had friends like that. Even just one, I don't need 3 necessarily. It's amazing how a movie, when well acted and directed, can evoke so many emotions.

>Sex and the City
>emotion outside revulsion
ha, ha oh you.

I think I am ok.

To be able to say that is a HUGE step for me.
I don't cry anymore.
Not like a did at first anyways.
I bought the new TBS album New Again when it came out on the 2nd.
It's pretty awesome I must say.
Music is my main form of relief these days.
That and beer.
Lots of beer.

Alcoholic.
Oh, also: ANYWAYS ANYWAYS ANYWAYS GUYS ANYWAYS. Running bit that's not getting old, probably.

Although now that I'm really, really single, I find myself up to my elbows in boys. I've been having to beat them off with a stick. It's ridiculous.

Just act disinterested in her and she'll jump your bones instantaneously. I have her figured out.
Also I wish you'd talk about something else for once, Christ. You're probably really annoying to be around (that's just me not committing, by the way: I'm positive she's annoying).

Wow.

This is the craziest, sadest, scariest and loneliest situation I've ever been in.
I can honestly say that I've never cried so much or so hard in my entire life.
I hate boys.

FUUUUUUCK.

I know I hurt him too, but not nearly to the degree that he is hurting me right now.

Oh look at that bullshit. I HURT HIM BUT THAT'S OKAY BECAUSE HE HURT ME WAY WORSE.

On another note, however, I met a boy last night. I'm a little curious, but incredibley too heartbroken to really give it much thought. And even if I were to pursue him, it's going to be the longest and slowest chase ever because well, I hate boys right now. This boy and I stayed up until 4:30 am watching a movie that we both fell asleep to.

Here let me save everyone some time and summarize this blog:
HEARTBROKEN
COCKS
HEARTBROKEN
COCKS
HEARTBROKEN
COCKS
BEER
COCKS
HEARTBROKEN
All right I'm punching out early and playing some vidya gayms or something.
Speaking of, real quick, I've come to a conclusion about the job ninja in FFXI: they don't have spells. Oh sure they have a "spell list" if you want to call it that, but it isn't the same shit that you use to light one of the many varieties of recolored crab on fire, oh no. The only way I can describe it is to borrow a term from somewhere else, and that term is WEEABOO FIGHTAN MAGIC. It's everything a Naruto fan would find totally awesome (read: totally useless).

Trust no one and yourself less.

Level 41 warrior, maggots. That means artifact weapon time but OH WAIT IT'S A ONE HANDED AXE WHY IS THAT?
I guess because Square was set on making sure every fucking piece of the Warrior artifact armor was shit or at best of dubious usefulness.
I kid the boots are all right. I guess.
For those of you who don't play FFXI (no one reading this) allow me to illustrate this situation by way of analogy: Warrior artifact armor : use :: PS3 : games.
Oh right I do something else here besides bitch about video games, don't I? Well I guess today we have this right here.

Oklahoma state has a law that will go into effect on Nov. 1 that will PUBLICLY POST THE INFORMATION OF WOMEN WHO HAVE HAD AN ABORTION.

This seems illegal. I've played a lot of Phoenix Wright so I know the law.
Here's a blog with the tag "how I'm gross" which is funny, I should use that in the future (only change "I" to "you" because that would indeed be more accurate).

I guess I have a thing for guys with mustaches now.

k

IM A PERSON, SO I MUST BE LABELLED

re-post this & bold-face all the labels that have been yours.
break the labels..

No.
What proceeds is a list of stereotypes, only most of which are at least partially true.
Case in point:

I DYE MY HAIR CRAZY COLORS, so I MUST be looking for attention.

I DRESS IN UNUSUAL WAYS so I MUST be looking for attention.

I'm INTO THEATER & ART, so I MUST be a homosexual.

Yes. All of these are true.

I SPOT GRAMMATICAL ERRORS, so I MUST be a pedantic bastard.

Oh what's up, me?

Maybe I'm biased towards him and anything that has to remotely do with him, or maybe because I have a degree in media studies,

Your degree in what?

I found a pubic hair in my face soap, and I honestly have no idea of it's mine or not.

:V

I want to be a philosopher.

"I wish to be a pedantic asshole with no beneficial contribution to society."

And while walking home tonight, some guy said he "wanted to lick that lady's piss stream." That's pretty creative.

:V

I am very excited for my next tattoo.

When my literary prize money comes through, I will be getting my sacred heart.

Come ooooooooooooooon hepatitis!

HOLE IS RECORDING A NEW ALBUM

I'm going to wear a babydoll dress to work in honour.

Heh things I understand.

Call me
Existential-Absurdist Girl once more.

I won't be doing that, but proceed.

In 24 hours, I've run into three men I've been entangled with.

I need to move.

HARLOT

-did coke for the first time with a male stripper in a sports bar

Cool story

-peak hotness achieved

Ha, ha, ha, ha yeah all right.

I'm a fucking comedian.
I used to say "I've been thinking of riding you all day" to my boyfriend.

Now I say it to my bike.

>comedian
>that "joke"

I'm dressing like I'm 13 again. I don't think this is a bad thing; I wore a lot of vintage stuff at that age.

So I saw a kid on campus dressed like Clint Eastwood from one of his westerns, and I figure if that nerd can get away with that shit I can dress like a 1930s gangster, surely?

Cham: rape is rape, and puke is puke (HOLY FUCKING TAUTOLOGY)

Oh boy tautological arguments. My favorite kind of bullshit from philosophy class.
Okay, I have one: THIS CUNTY BLOG IS FUCKING CUNTY :C
(this argument isn't tautological because it qualifies something) OH NOOOO I AM BECOMING LIKE THEM
Okay, I can do better: BOY THIS BLOG SURE IS CUNTY!
Get it, because a blog is by definition cunty and therefore saying it's cunty is redundant awww yeah.

I'd give anything to feel supple again.

What

You so anti dont i matter

What

WHAT

What

WHAT

What
What
So I guess that's it. Gotta go GRIND SOME MOAT CARPS :V

ultros.jpg

Christfags are funny, aren't they? I mean they always go on and on about living a Christian lifestyle and avoiding sin and shit. Usually this only pertains to the lives of others, because they'll be goddamned if they have to analyze any of their behaviors.
This runs, of course, contrary to the exact teachings of the Bible, which espouses that all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God, and that's sort of why the whole Jesus Christ business.
But no, we're here today to get our Catholic on and feel guilty about having human emotions, because as we all know, guilt brings us closer to the Lord.
I thought that was suffering, oh wait--
Well, good thing I'm not a Christfag. Don't really need to know this shit.

Yeah, I just wanted to apologize for what I said about Natalie Dylan in my last journal entry. She might be putting her virginity up for auction, but that doesn't give me the right to use vulgar words associated with those who are involved in prostitution.

That's right, bitch. Jesus Christ himself had this to say:
"Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man."

I didn't realize it would offend everyone so much. It's probably not very "Christian" of me or good for my testimony. I just get SO ANGRY with people who don't give sex the respect and honor it deserves.

Whoa hi large font. Also he who is without sin cast the first stone, etc etc but as I said WE'RE HERE TO GET A CHRISTFAG ON WHICH MEANS HYPOCRISY.

What I'd really like to do is write my novel. I've tried writing it many times before but these computers at the library only give you so many minutes to work with. What I need is a good long day to sit down without any interuptions and just write my heart out for hours.

Geez how did that one guy, what was his name, Chaucer? How did he write his stories? I seem to recall something about... Paper or something. And a pen, yeah, that's it! Paper and a pen!

Jehovah's Witnesses came to my door this morning before 9 AM which is when I wake up every day. I was so disappointed that I wasn't there when they knocked because for years I've been studying what they believe and figuring out what I would say to one of them if I ever met one.

Wow your life just sounds filled with meaning.

Please Lord, grant me gorgeous weather on Sunday afternoon and calm my spirit and make it a beautiful day and help me be an excellent wife for Your glory!!!

ME ME ME ME ME GRANT ME THINGS

The rest of this entry will be about what I now feel is approriate and not appropriote for marriage since I've change my views a little bit.

This is good. I've been waiting to see what you had to say about the venerable institute of marriage, because prior to you everyone had just been wandering around guessing at shit.

Now, this entry is NOT to condemn. It is simply to inform others about my beliefs.

Good. This is important.

I believe that lust is a sin. What your body may not be doing physically... your mind is doing mentally.

Yes, Jesus Christ himself has expressed similar notions.

So experimenting before marriage with things like topless massages, passionate making out, and all things that aren't technically sex is playing with fire. You're dancing on the line of sexual immorality.

YOU'RE PLAYING WITH FIRE, YOU HEAR ME? IF 000sundancer000 SAYS SO, IT MUST BE TRUE!

It has been two years since Mathew said, "I want to marry you." We haven't ever touched each other inappropriately or showed skin where it shouldn't be exposed.

Wow you two sound like tons o' fun.

Think about how you might feel if you learned that your spouse was intimate with someone else. Would that make you hurt and jealous?

No the only thing that would make me feel hurt or jealous is myself, but if the bitch does that the game is fucking on.
Now there's a ton of posts that are so fucking boring, holy shit.
Uhhhhhhhh now there are a ton of posts about prayer and shit. Whatever, bitch. I have demons to slay on the internet. While you're praying away I have horrors to kill.

Don't tease the octopus, kids

Yeah baby, samurai level 27 to 30, warrior level 36 to 39 (!), dark knight level 1 to 10, dragoon level 4 to 10. This weekend was a very productive weekend in every category that matters.
Oh right, the real world. Well, unsurprisingly, there's still douchebaggery afoot. I confirmed this the moment I stepped into class today. Here we have Mistressdeath (groan).
First thing you'll likely notice about this blog is that it's crazy randum xD, the highest form of humor, at least according to Socrates. Plato. Whoever.

Brian: If there are any rewrites of the KJV it should be like The Bible and Ninjas, like Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.
me: YES! Really, Vampire Jesus sort of makes sense. Rising from the dead, all that. And now they can make a film version where he sparkles.
Brian: Well that's what's so special about Jesus, he's both a zombie and a vampire.
me: I wonder if he ate Judas' brains. That would be a sweet plot twist for the movie version.
Brian: bible REMIX
me: ::record scratching sounds::

So randum xD

I am concerned because I put my last name in a friends-only post, and obviously I don't want that post to become public. Smart people of the internets, I humbly request your help.

Yeah someone is totally e-stalking you.
Ha, ha people treating the internet like it's real life. Don't post your last name on the internet, people, come on.

In fact, I think the more integrated minorities (sexual or otherwise) are into the world at large, the more everybody else is forced to see real people instead of stereotypes.

Oh hi class I thought I just left (went home to get away from, in fact) I see we're still having this conversation.
Yeah apparently people look and think differently than I do.

It's pretty sad that one of the few places in the suburbs that facilitated that is now discriminating against a segment of its patrons.


Now, back to the previously-scheduled program: trying not to puke my guts out all over the place.

Whatevs.

During a convoluted discussion about BJ Novak from "The Office," Jon decided that my new nickname is "Hand Job." I don't think he's really thought this through. Giving your wife a nickname like "Hand Job" sends a certain message to the world, one that maybe he doesn't want to send. Hmm. Maybe I should nickname him "Donkey Punch."

Your nickname is really the measure of your worth as a person. While you have nicknames like "Hand job" and ""cumdumpster" or whatever, people like Frank Nitti have nicknames like "The Enforcer", the title of a fine Clint Eastwood movie.
I know Frank Nitti was dead before Clint Eastwood ever made a movie, but it still gives me pause for thought.

The camera and the computer finally decided to work together and allow me to upload images.

Computers are sentient and this is how it works.

For our cotton anniversary, I had these shirts made into a quilt.

Excuse me?

Even though two years of marriage doesn't sound like very long,

No there is no "even though". Two years isn't that long.

it's still a milestone. The fact that two people as stubborn as we are haven't killed or maimed each other by this point attests to our deep and abiding love.

I predict a long, healthy marriage.

On a day like today, when the temperature is more or less perfect for enjoying a cool breeze off the lake, there's no good reason to be inside anyways.

ANYWAYS
ANYWAYS
ANYWAYS GUYS
ANYWAYS
Also, au contraire, there's never a good reason to be outdoors.

Jon was able to meet me for lunch today at Nine Muses, before I went to the museum, and we ate quickly enough that we had time to walk in the park by Old St. Pat's.

The name of a pretentious restaurant where pretentious people eat.
Still though, correct. There are only nine muses.
FINAL JEOPARDY NAME ALL OF THEM GO GO GO

We held hands on the path while I crunched mustard seeds that were stuck in my teeth and he told me about patching servers, and while I don't really know what that is, I was happy to listen.

I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS, GUYS. Look it up, son of a fuck.
Now there's a post about having wisdom teeth out. Heh, enjoy that, primitives. I get to keep mine.

Hello, people who talk about "The Mexicans."

I have news.

You know "the Mexicans" you talk about all the time? As if they're all going to connect together like Transformers and form one Giant Mexican?

I'm detecting butthurt.
Also before you proceed: in my world, any comparison to Transformers, no matter how obtuse or supposedly negative, is a compliment.
Proceed.
Oh, unless, of course, it's in reference to Michael Bay.
Proceed.

Go look at a map of Mexico. No, really. Go look.

O--okay, what am I doing, exactly?
I know this doesn't actually apply to me because frankly I could give a shit about Mexicans or any other sort of immigrant, but I'm piqued.

Do you see how big Mexico is? I know you like to think the USA is OMG BIGGEST COUNTRY EVAR!!1!

>EVAR!!1!
:|
Also: the US is a lot bigger than Mexico, so I'm not really seeing your point.

because bigger always equals better. Mexico is really big, though.

According to that fountain of knowledge that is Wikipedia, Mexico isn't even in the top ten largest countries (by land mass) but do continue. I'm riveted. (that's definitely sarcasm in case you couldn't tell)

Take a few moments to find, on the map, the cities Oaxaca, Cozumel, Juarez, and La Paz. You'll notice that these places aren't very close to one another. Yet, they are all full of...Mexicans!

Okay. Not getting too technical, are you?

If you are one of those people who bristle at being lumped in with New Yorkers, LA residents, or Southerners when you say that you're American, you should understand this.

I'm okay with this. Except Texans. They don't count.

I therefore do not want to hear you loitering around campus and talking about "the Mexicans." You know, some of them are even actually Americans, as in, they were born here and may speak English as a first language. Brown does not equal foreign.

Christ can I not get away from Foundations of Education today? Apparently not.

Coming soon in this series: No, That Romanian Woman Is Not Polish.

Wow you're giving people a lot of credit if you think anyone knows the critical differences between Romanian and Polish.

When we moved in, we noticed right away the loud calling of two Cooper's Hawks. They're not usually very vocal, so it wa

Holy shit I saw a hawk swoop down and grab a rabbit today while I was driving. Sorry to interrupt your really boring story with something totally awesome, do continue. Man, I saw all sorts of shit today. I saw a real transvestite, too. Always an adventure.

s no surprise that they turned out to be nesting in a nearby tree.

Yeah whatever.
Man speaking of hawks, is anyone else fucking pumped for Assassin's Creed 2? I cannot wait. November 17, wooooooooooo--
I know the symbolism in Assassin's Creed figured more around eagles than hawks, but still same shit. Birds of prey.

We haven't been able to buy Mario Karts for Wii since the stores seem to know we're coming and hide all their copies. We rented it instead, and quickly I'm learning some things.

1)I'm still not very good at this game.

girlsplayingvideogames.jpg
Now there's a video of what I thought was some woman attempting to perfect robotic leg movement but it turns out to be just some sort of furfag contraption. This is why we'll never have Gundams in real life, people.
All right that's it I have to study for some really douchey test.

I am the sword that cleaves evil

Leveled samurai from 21 to 27 yesterday, so I'm basically a marathon man. Can't say the same for my character, who inexplicably started missing EVERY HIT EVER towards the end. Light weight.
But anyway, enough about totally awesome things that involve stabbing giant crabs with lightning, we have BLOGS TO REVIEW TODAY.
You'll (maybe) notice the blog is entitled "Radical Woman" which is a serious misnomer. About as bad as those Youtube videos that promise nudity, but you know for a fact that shit would get shot down instantaneously so you click on it just to see what kind of HILARIOUS RICK ROLL-ESQUE VIDEO YOU'LL BE RECEIVING TODAY but then you still feel bad because you still fucking clicked on it.
It's exactly like that. I sat here thinking "no way she's any sort of radical" then I felt smug for a minute because my suspicions were indeed confirmed but OH WAIT I'M STILL READING IT.

One of my strengths as a 23 year old is knowing and understanding how I used to be. Although I may not remember the thought process or exactly how I felt about who, when, and why...I do remember the important things and can make sense of it all now.

I guess I was just trying to give that to you as well.

One of her strengths as a very mature 23 year old-- whatever.

well Hawaii was nice, coming home was crazy.
everything hit the fan, good and the bad...the bad was really bad--in all subjects.

I wonder what God is teaching me right now.

Oh fuck I know what I'm in for now.

I cleared my throat in ASL...things like that make me laugh at myself.

It's funny how taking a break makes you need a break when you come home.

What?
Oh I get it. See, ASL is American Sign Language and you wouldn't need to clear your throat because you're not talking-- wow. This is dire.
Now there are some poems I'm not fucking reading because frankly I get enough of this shit during class.
... Oh go on, then. I'll do one :3

When your mind is a mess
So is mine
I cant sleep
Cause it hurts when I think

FUCK YOU FOR MAKING MY FONT GO CRAZY

All the words that we say
And the words that we mean
Words can fall short
Can't see the unseen
Cause the world is awake
For somebody's sake now, please close your eyes woman
Please get some sleep

Wow that's really-- wow.
All right I think that's enough.

Adrian is now married. Mrs. Johnson. Wow.

I think I might take another part time job...something to do with my extra non-wedding-planning time. Also, I'm taking classes in the Fall...
History of Jazz
University Singers
American Sign Language

Wow what a brutal schedule. Music majors are such complainers, too. I HAVE A GUITAR TEST TODAY!
Ohhhh well fuck me! The rooms I have to go to barely have light bulbs while you're sitting in your two new buildings but at least I don't have a fucking guitar test!

I'm really excited about all of the one hundred level courses I'm going to take in the next year. Wheelthrown ceramics will have to wait until next summer.

Just not enough time in the day to take Wheelthrown ceramics (don't even know what that is)
I know people who manage to take 18 credit hours in psychology while working, just saying.
It may seem like I'm being particularly unfair today but I'm majoring in English so I'm basically five up from last in terms of difficulty so this is a rare day for me, okay.

They should make Lisa Frank t-shirts, I bet millions of young adult women would buy them.

Young adult women. What the fuck are you some kind of marketing computer?

I think I'm one of those "just do it" kinda people. (sidenote: I should work for Nike, I know)

I just jump into something whether or not I'm ready and see if it works out. But once I jump I stay committed until "mission complete".

A commendable, space marine quality, I think.

For example, if a tough decision needs to be made, I'm totally there--but when it's something small like what kind of cereal should I buy for the next three weeks of my life..."Honey, what do you feel like?"

I'm pathetic.

Wow. I guess this must be what they call "bad writing". How Games Workshop writers can go on about honor and duty and shit for pages and it's still interesting but I'm already bored of her commitments two sentences in.

Special K with Strawberries, Honeynut Cheerios, or Frosted Flakes?

(walks around and thinks about it for two minutes, debating, then finds Adam and asks him...)

Cheerios if you have any goddamn sense.
Uh-oh logging into FFXI I sense my attention waning.

So I stayed home last night from Truth Project. Truth Project is this awesome study that answers all these tough questions Christians are faced with--well everyone is faced with really. What is truth, who is man, where did earth come from, is evolution consistent, is creation consistent, what is the bible, is it true, philosophy, matter, science, etc. I've been learning a lot...which is good. Learning=good.

>Bible
>science
:3
Also pretty much everything you need to know about life, philosophy, religion, etc. can be summarized in one video under two minutes in length.
Aww yeah just got Utsusemi: ichi
oh wait I'm still supposed to be updating this.
Uhh-- entry over I guess go home :c