Ugh, God

So if you have some time to kill you can read the fucking epic that is the patch notes for FFXIV.
Sure glad I'm leveling culinarian for when the food changes in 1.19 come-- oh they were moved back to 1.20.
Good.
Oh well~
Guess that gives me ample time to get it to 50.
So much, in fact, that I'm fast tracking weaver. R41 already~
If you came here for blogs and not a rant on video games (what's wrong with you, anyway?) then you can go here instead.
This blog is entitled "Purity Ponders" by "Purity Persimmons".
The avatar is what caught my attention, actually. It's just a unicorn but I'm pretty sure one of the greatest painted Warhams uses that exact avatar as its chapter symbol. Anyway, not important.
WE HAVE SHITTY BLOGS TO REVIEW.

What always makes you laugh?

Unsurprising: the amount of people that said FUNNY CAT PICTURES FROM REDDIT xP
Reddit. The pox boil on the ass of the internet.

I was going to write an observation about the plethora of satire that seems to be around at the moment - how even the better quality material can abet our jaded, post-modern cynicism and render us less likely to actually protest about the corporations and individuals in question, or to seek viable alternatives - but time has defeated me once again. So you're spared a pseudo-intellectual analysis.

Thank you.
Spared the pseudo-intellectual analysis, my lucky fucking day.
I love how long her responses to the goddamn writer's block are. You know how most people type less information than is required to form a coherent thought? I guess Purity Buttercup Persimmons or whatever her name is stole the other words.
Also I clicked on her user info and her real name is Kathy.
Hi Katherine. :3

Or an affectionate meander through the annals of Fawlty Towers, One Foot In The Grave and 70s sitcoms, for that matter. Instead I shall give you the pithier (and probably more honest) response : fart gags and people falling over. Every time...

You know what never fails to make me laugh? Bullshit like this.
There's one entry I created in particular that I like to revisit. Yes, I found it.
Just loooove that pretentious philosophical waxing.

What’s your favorite show on television?

Her response: five sizable paragraphs.
My favorite show currently on TV is QI.
There.

I am attempting to answer these questions each day (although I failed miserably in this modest endeavour yesterday, which hardly bodes well) as my small contribution to the 'save LJ from sliding down the toilet' campaign.

I think as my three years' of entries can attest LJ isn't really sliding anywhere so much as it has always been complete shit.
Also I find really long essays on trivial matters are often the key to saving any website.

This is a tricky one, though, as we do not actually own a TV. Obviously, I can watch programmes on the trusty laptop, but increasingly I find myself indifferent to what is on offer. Or too intellectually challenged to allot 60+ minutes to a topic which might require real concentration or provoke abstract thought. My bad, I know.

Surely someone as pretentious as you wouldn't be intellectually threatened by TV.
Or maybe that's sarcasm.
I know people bitch about not being able to read sarcasm in the written word (hint, idiots: context clues) but you are so devoid of humor it's impossible to tell and I suspect it would be difficult in real life as well.

Thus, a slightly tangential exercise in nostalgia; which I'm hoping may be excused on the grounds that a channel somewhere must surely be showing anything I happen to mention here.

Not how semicolons work.
I actually came across a perplexing grammatical issue recently in the form of Dawn of War II.
There was a semicolon (I think) but what followed the semicolon was the phrase "yet now".
Ignoring that I don't think I've ever seen the phrase "yet now" prior to this game I'm not sure if that warrants a semicolon. Yes, the full sentence is "Kyras left much corrupted and cleansing had to be both thorough and merciless; yet now, we are pure and noble." Yet sets up a contrast so I'd think you wouldn't need a semicolon, but "now" creates a juxtaposition between the past and the present so I'd think a semicolon might be warranted in this situation.
I've been trying to work "yet now" into my speech in real life but it's not as practical as I originally thought.

What are your favorite song lyrics, and why?

Remember this one? Only four paragraphs for this response.

Being strictly honest, they would be the same ones that I gave in answer to exactly this question a mere couple of months ago. If I wasn't such a Luddite technophobe I would provide a link to the post.

You don't need to say "Luddite technophobe", you know. It's as redundant as saying "stupid idiot". They both mean fear of technology.

But I am - and I am also full of the cold from hell and beset by an invasion of in-laws at the moment - so it seems much the simpler option to proffer an alternative selection. Here goes :-

Did you just have a colon and a hyphen?
Oh God.
What, is it "exercise in obscure grammar day" and no one told me?
You do realize a hyphen (or a double hyphen in writing, as it should be) is pretty much only there for when you want a pause mark but none fit (or you're unsure what would fit, as it typically is). I like the hyphen. It replaces all those douchier marks like hurr semicolons.

"Libraries gave us power..." from Design For Life by the Manic Street Preachers.

What an opening line for a song that became anthem to a generation and reached number 2 in the charts when singles charts still had some kind of genuine cultural relevance. The song was both a critique of and a love letter to the working class. A class that does not exist in that sense any longer.

Don't care.

This song celebrates the empowering democratic merits of education. The importance of being given access to the written word and the encouragement to utilise this opportunity. The fact that many of these Libraries and Institutes were commissioned and paid for by the Miners and their ilk. The staggering fact that once, people such as this revered academic achievement and aspired to better themselves.

This was pop music in England?
Really?

The sad truth that there will always be elements who hold in contempt anything they do not immediately understand or sympathise with. The inherent dichotomy that seems always poised on the brink of violence or self-immolation.

"Inherent dichotomy" has to be one of the douchier things I've heard in the last-- 10 or so hours.
I heard some douchy things last night, okay.

What is your LEAST favorite movie of all time, and why?

My least favorite movie of all time-- I don't remember this question.
There are so many shitty movies to choose from.
So many shitty movies--
Oh, right. Man of the Year.
I cannot recall a time being angrier in the theater than when I went to see that piece of shit.

Pretty Woman.

Appalling premise. Objectifies and commodifies femininity and taught a generation of women to aspire no higher than feisty but ultimately submissive handmaiden.

"Feisty but ultimately submissive handmaiden" is what I'd look for in a spouse.
By which I mean--
No fuck it no covering for that statement.
Although I wouldn't want her to look like Julia Roberts.
That'd be unfortunate.

The Julia Roberts character is basically an early WAG prototype.

WAG?
Anyone?
Fuck--

WAGs (or Wags) is an acronym, used particularly by the British tabloid press, to describe the wives and girlfriends of high-profile football players, originally the England national football team.

Thanks, Wikipedia.

The Richard Gere character seems to have no redeeming features whatsoever. And the whole thing peddles a candy coated, 'lifestyle choice' interpretation of prostitution which is incredibly reductive and damaging. I have no idea why this film has become such a cult classic - it even had Roxette on the soundtrack for crissakes - but I think we are overdue an almighty backlash rather than the promised and depressingly predictable re-make.

Your movie sounds way, way better than my choice. Man of the Year has absolutely no redeeming features. Yours had Roxette at least. The only redeeming feature of Man of the Year is it ends and it didn't somehow kill you while you were watching it.
I find when you're trying to make a comedy it's a really good idea to have brutally serious action scenes and melodrama.

Would you rather be a vampire or a vampire hunter, and why?

Vampire hunter, obviously.

Vampire. Better odds.

Yeah because in Dracula, Dracula kills Van Helsing.
Hey--

If you could get a free, unlimited supply of one food for life, what would you choose?

The greatest internet scholars of our time have debated this subject endlessly for weeks and the conclusion is breadsticks.
I was a part of this glorious debate so I'll just repeat it because I believe this conclusion to be correct.

What I choose is academic. I'd be sick of the sight of it in a couple of years, I imagine. If not sooner.

Much time was spent on this exact issue but breadsticks fit alongside almost any other food so you wouldn't grow tired of them.

What is your favorite opening line of a book, and why?

I bet yours is pretentious~

"There was only one catch, and that was Catch 22."

That is a good book, though.
Most people completely miss the fucking point of it but what else is new.

From Joseph Hellers "Catch 22." A flawed book, and possibly overrated, but points up the sheer futility of war with considerable literary flourish and pitch black wit. I think the opening line would pique anyones curiosity, and it also encapsulates the entire thrust of the novel.

Douche.

What's your deepest, darkest fear? Have you tried to overcome it?

I FEAR NOTHING.

Death. Any ideas how to overcome that one (not involving religious or quasi-religious metaphorical flummery and mummery) will be gratefully considered.

Well you're going to die no matter what, so what's the point in fearing it?

I realise actually shelling out cold hard cash for music is just so last decade, but the new Adele album - "21" - is well worth it.

Excuse me?

The girl has a voice to send shivers down any spine and songwriting skills that very much belie her years. Check out singles "Rolling In The Deep" and "Someone Like You" if you don't believe me.

Turned my spine to broken glass, maybe.
Fuck the poooolice.

She puts the soul into soulful and is a talent to be treasured.

She puts the soul in soulful.
She does?
I didn't think she did.
Maybe I'm mistaken?
I'm listening to "Rolling in the Deep" as we speak and I'm not really feeling it.
I mean people were comparing this to Dusty Springfield?
Serious?
Ohh I don't know about things anymore. I think I'm going to go do something else before my brain explodes.

With fire and sword

This blog was difficult. At first I was going to review it, then it got really stupid with fanfiction but then it picked back up again so let's see where it takes me.
Also I'd like to take a brief respite before we begin to cover givegodtheglory (why can't I stop talking about her?) Remember that weather question last time?
Well:

Overcast, not too cool, and not hot. Maybe with a fine drizzle.

NOTHING ABOUT ASSUMING I HAVE AS FAVORITE WEATHER PATTERN.
For shame.

Besides LJ, what websites are you always surfing?

You'll be amazed to learn another website people spend a lot of time surfing is fanfiction.net.

I have a test tomorrow at 9. I know this. I also know I don't know the material. So why am I on the computer? I keep doing this. I keep not doing my work, or even half trying.

Let me acknowledge my problem because like so many idiots of the internet I seem to be under the mistaken impression that acknowledging my problems somehow solves them.
Now here are some haikus she's written.
I like haikus because they're short.

Salvation confounds
The reason of men to a
Degree so unknown

Confounds reason because it's irrational nonsense.

The Spirit is more
Imporant than the flesh for
It shall never die

Well I'm sold. The soul certainly is "imporant".

The glory of God
Refines and consumes all men
Give praise to the Lord

GIVE PRAISE TO THE ETERNAL EMPEROR.

I must still believe
Even when my heart would doubt.
This thing is called faith.

This thing is called mental illness.
Oh but that's not five syllables. "Faith" works too, then.

I swear, I am the stupidest moron on the face of the planet right now. I would slap me if I believed in self-punishment or thought it would help, but my gosh...I am dumb.

Well as has been often repeated on this blog: "girls are dumb".

...'I don't want to talk about it'...That's what I frikkin' said, the actual words that caused this little pity party. Imbecile.

The depths of my own stupidity stagger me at times...

If I hadn't realized just how badly I shoved my foot in my mouth, this wouldn't - well, no, of course I wouldn't. Ignorance of the fact and all that.

I didn't skip anything, incidentally. This is how this entry starts. So I guess someone asked her how she was or how something went or something and now we have this-- I guess.

...Lord, help me, this your idiot child. Because seriously, I don't even know what's wrong with me. You know. You made me, and before You did, You must have looked at the moment and just rolled Your eyes.

I don't believe that you were made.
Spawned, perhaps?
Somehow generated through a program that attempted to make the douchiest human possible?

But seeing that, You still decided to go ahead with the plan to see me born, moronic though I may be. And seeing as You are the One Who made all things glorious, made me, and re-made me, I must be glorious as well. Although I obviously am not anywhere near the level You would have me to be yet because...'I don't want to talk about it.'

Because "let me have long, whiny posts where I don't explain a goddamn thing."

To pull an Adam and Even type flavor, he really should have made it clear what exaxtly 'it' was. I shouldn't have listened though, and tried to understand rather than giving him the brush off.

You know what? Fine. If you're not going to make sense I'm not going to read it.

Who forgot her lab notebook, after she pulled a scantron out the thing and shoved it in her bag? Who forgot her freaking pencil box, leaving it to sit ever so lonely on the stupid desk at home? Who doesn't know how to make a frikkin' mole?
Any guesses?

How to make a mole? I assume you mean a mole in chemistry and not a creature.
It has been forever since I've had chemistry-- uhh, don't you just divide by the molecular weight and add Avogadro's Number?

I blame Dad. He was teasing me yesterday about my tea drinking - which used to be coffee drinking, but it makes for an erratic heartbeat - and saying maybe I should try drinking only every other day. Well, I had two yesterday, so I'm like 'Oh, this'll be easy', despite Daddy saying I'm addicted. I am not. I am just somewhat used to operating with an above average amount of caffiene in my system. Without it, my brain function seems to be a little less, considering the rather important items I left behind.

I forgot to do something
I BLAME MY FATHER.

In any event, I can in fact quit anytime, and I will not be telling Daddy Darling about this little mishap. And in the future, not getting the caffiene in on the day I have to wake up at six rather than seven, yeah, that should be reversed.

I CAN QUIT ANYTIME I'M NOT ADDICTED.
Denial~

Tomorrow, first thing bright and early, I have a chemistry test. I will flunk it. I'm just sayin'; it's a fact.

Chemistry is pretty hard. I wound up studying quite a bit for it.
Something you don't appear to be doing if your "wow I should be studying but I'm not lol" posts are to be taken seriously.

Also, tea is my new thing. I've had at least one cup every day for the past week or so. And we (mother and some other ladies) are going to Orlando for a week. I guess it will count as my 'senior trip' although I graduated last year. Then we get back, it's back to school (either on the 18th or 19th. I should really figure out which. But the first day really doesn't matter; they just read the syllabus)

First day is pretty important. It's where you learn how to pass the class, basically. I've had classes where everyone not in attendance the first day got automatically dropped from the course.
But hey, if you want to miss your first day of college ever because going to the website is too difficult to navigate then good luck with that shit--
but unfortunately, as we all know, she made her first day and has been whining about it ever since.

And the teachers! Oh, yeah, sis NOW tell me taht taking Micro and A&P at the same time is a BAD idea! Brilliant! You're so helpful and I totally love and appreciate your for the glorious advice...SARCASM!
I'M GONNA FAIL! I'm gonna have to do this ALL OVER AGAIN and miss the MLT program and I'll be stuck here until 2014! That is A YEAR more than I should be! I don't wanna be here that long. How am I supposed to get my Camaro if I'm here, not working, not drawing a check, and with my nose falling off?!

...
Anyway I think I'm going to go do something else now.

All good health is temporary

PREPARE YOUR BUTTS

This journal is (mostly) friends-only, due to my recognising my spastic and overly-emotional tendencies. If you would rather be spared that and just would like to read the lulz (which are posted public), feel free to add me!

Like all blogs, this can be safely ignored as bullshit because, as I'm about to demonstrate, there are many entries of which a reader can partake.
LUUUUCKY ME~

What’s your favorite kind of weather?

That is making a huge assumption that people have a favorite kind of weather.
My BFF Givegodtheglory didn't update today so I'm taking her mantle of smug douchecunt for now.

Delicious early fall early mornings, usually before the sun comes up or just before. The air is so crispy and chilly it wakes you right up, and yet it doesn't permeate your skin and chill you to the bone. The air has a kind of solitary, only-person-on-earth feeling, and yet it's so wonderful you don't mind so much.

yeah, yeah shut up.
This entry was really an exercise in purple prose and "how much of a total twat can I be?"

I love best to just curl up outside with a poncho and some tea or cocoa and just listen to everything wake up while I enjoy the cold. The beauty of it takes me away, and keeps me in place, if that makes sense.

My favorite weather pattern is rain.
There.
WAS THAT SO HARD?
Woooow now there are three entries in a row that are her Tweets.
You must really think a lot of yourself if you have to copy and paste your Twats from Twatter on Livejournal and think anyone gives a fuck.
Here we go, a rant called "Girly and Manly" with a cut "Feminism".
Looking forward to this--

You know, women gamers put up with a lot that we're not given credit for.

Women gamers put up with a lot-- if it bothers you just stop doing it.
I've said this a million billion times but if you have a hobby that's no longer fun or enjoyable to you just stop doing it. No one is making you play the juegos, you know.
Like, what, am I supposed to give you credit for being brave and playing video games?
What, are you out of your fucking mind?
Well if playing the juegos is something worthy of praise then I'd like you to praise me for beating Demon's Souls, one of the hardest games ever.
I'd additionally like praise for knowing Mega Man X so well I can basically speedrun it without trying.
I'd also like additional praise for CHECK THIS FUCKING SHIT OUT, GUYS:

YEAAAAH BLADEDANCER BOOTS.
Best boots in the game you are all mad jelly.

If you're like my sisters and I, you were raised with gaming at a very young age. As such, we always had to place our emotions and actions behind a male protagonist - and hardly ever did we complain.

Oh, that's what you deserve praise for.
Well my Final Fantasy XI and Final Fantasy XIV character were both women and you don't hear me pitching a bitch, do you?
In fact, I actively selected a female character when I could have picked a male. I am far, far more noble and worthy than you if this is what is worth praise to you.
... I'd like to emphasize that I'm applying "worthy" in the classic sense, not that I'm being self entitled. "Worthy" in the classic sense meaning generally good or adept at whatever or an all-around good guy to get shit done.

For us, it never took away from the game, nor did it really matter that they were male. We were able to adapt to a male-dominant virtual world.

Well I think this entry has proven when I want a game about whining and period cramping then I'll look to a female protagonist but when I want to kill dragons and demons then I'm going to have to side with men.
Also I'd like to mention Edie learned yet another bow skill that's basically machine gunning arrows. I guess this one is more of a shotgun: barrage shoots 4 arrows at once.
So there's an ability that lets you nock up to 3 arrows, an ability that instantly nocks 3 arrows, an ability that machine guns 5 arrows and now an ability that shotguns 4 arrows.
Jesus Christ Edie, calm down.
I don't think I've seen this much bloodlust and ultraviolence since I saw a Space Marine stab an Ork through the head to regain HP.
Something Edie can do too, incidentally.

And yet when games nowadays come out with female protagonists they are (generally, here) passed over by the majority of male gamers, who for some reason find playing such games akin to getting castrated. Why is that?

I don't know, why don't you tell me?
I'd like to mention that in PSO, my favorite game of all time, One of my three main characters was a girl and when I retired from that game she was the highest level.
So please, do go on. I know exactly what you're talking about currently.

It's the same with books. Young girls and women have no problem getting behind a male protagonist and reading books by males, but dare give books to boys or guys by female authors or female protagonists, and you're (generally) snorted at and told that "that's chick-lit".

Edie started out kind of a cute character but I wouldn't fuck with her now. She's proven to have several Space Marine abilities and be cunningly brutal as well as brutally cunning.
She's basically just one ability short called something like "pentagram soul suck horror" of being a super villain.

Males deprive themselves of really good characters when they do this, but are never even told such. And yet when women actively seek out fiction written by women or starring females, they're labelled as (generally) anti-male. Why is that?

Most nerds I know hold Final Fantasy VI in the highest of esteem and its main protagonist is female.
In fact, arguably two of its three main protagonists are women.
Final Fantasy Tactics, too. Main characters, I would have to say, would be Ramza, Delita, Ovelia and Alma, two of which are women.
Even the very masculine Halo has a woman main character. Sure she's not the main character, but she's of significant import.
I think. I've never played Gaylo.
Also the beloved Metroid series stars a woman and Super Metroid especially is typically regarded as one of the best games ever made.
So no, I'm not really following you here.
I'm sure you'd argue Metroid doesn't count because Samus Aran isn't really observably female through most of the game (I thought she was a robot when I was a kid) but that's kind of bullshit and sexist too because that implies women have to look different simply because they're women in the grimdark far future when power armor exists. I mean she is covered completely in armor, it's not like you have to accommodate for female features when you're 500 pounds of armor.

Is it the way we are raised, in a society so biased on gender-division? Boys toys and girls toys, boys clothes and girls clothes (so much to the point of actually making the way shirts and pants open and close differently for each sex), boys books and girls books, boys sports and girls sports, hen parties and stag parties, ect ect ect... Yeah, I understand that boys and girls are different in obvious ways, but do we have to indict it so much in ways so extreme?

I don't know, you're the one whining about no female protagonists in video games.

Why do we assume a guy is "girly" because he enjoys the colour pink or writes poetry?

... Because he is?
Except Ben Jonson. The only poet who wasn't a complete fag.
In fact he beat someone to death over the accusation.
Now there's a hardcore motherfucker.

Why do we assume a girl is "butch" because her hair is short and enjoys cars?

... Because she is?

To me, the reason why feminism is not only stalled, but spiralling backwards in some ways, is because of our inability to even admit the above. If we admit it, we would finally be admitting the problem, and recognising that things need to change. But we are too lazy as a society, and thus nothing gets changed.

I think the reason feminism is stalled is because you've already won all the rights you deserve. Pretty much what remains is hard work and individual merit but that's somehow not equal enough for you still.
It's basically a determent at this point in time. You don't need a super special secret club anymore, women. It's time to shed the relics of the past and join integrated society.

It is the poison of male privilege in our culture, that men are so used to being considered the norm and women a "deviation from that norm".

Says one comment.
I'll tell you what: when you can shoot 15 arrows in the span of 10 seconds you can do whatever the fuck you want and I won't say shit.

I had dreams that I was Lina Inverse, but still going to my high school.

Don't give a shit--
Lina Inverse is from the animu Slayers, incidentally.
If she were Lina Inverse this blog would be interesting so I know this is a complete FIIIICTION.

I haven't shaved in a couple of days but I'm wearing shorts. Do you think anyone will notice?

I don't think anyone cares that much.

I'm really starting to enjoy meditation. I sometimes actually crave it. I'll be reading, and then my eyes slide to my straw cushion, and I'll end up putting the book down and doing zazen for like, fifteen minutes.

Truly you have mastered Zen.
Craving and desires: POINT OF BUDDHISM.

The longest I've sat is only a half-hour, but hey, I'm a newbie. Leave me alone.

You're not prepared for knowing without knowing, I'm just going to put that out there.
Here's a post entitled "You Know What Irks Me?" and no I don't, but I'm sure I'm about to discover what.

When entitled people bitch about things not being perfect enough for them.

Yes, it totally sucks that LJ was down for several days last week. But put things into perspective for once, would you?

And what a great few days those were.

While it may have been unwise to sell their servers to Russia, that doesn't mean they deserve to have their servers attacked with DDoS due to censorship spats. No server, no matter who they are, deserves that.

While I might call that a bit hypocritical I don't necessarily see the problem--
DDoSing is a fact of life when you're a server--

So whining that LJ should do more about it, that permanent accounts should get cookies, that paid accounts should get gold, is ridiculous. Permanent users, you all had a one-time fee, and you get more than what paid members get; I think it's fair for those of us who pay to get compensated.

Hey wait a minute. Aren't you entitled and yet you're bitching?
Huh.

However, paid users, that doesn't mean we deserve more than two weeks - two weeks is GENEROUS, since we were only inconvenienced ONE WEEK. I wouldn't start looking gift horses just in the mouth if I were you.

*jumps off the soapbox and goes to eat some cereal*

Gross.
Oh right, I'm sorry. I forgot you aren't entitled. You have to deal with the tremendous discrimination that is playing video games and being a female at the same time.

Here's the thing. I don't mind being fat, in the long run. I mind occasionally when I have to fit into a swimsuit, or strip naked in front of Terry, but for the most part, I don't give a shit.
Therefore, it really gets my goat that now, when people notice I've lost a significant amount of weight due to being sick, and they tell me I look "good now", I want to ask them what the fuck that is supposed to mean, even though I know full well what it means.
It means that fat is unattractive. Fat is not nice. Fat is ugly, and if you can get rid of it through any means, you are successful. It doesn't matter if your insides are rebelling against you and the loss is a result, if you have lost that weight, you are a winner.

>I don't give a shit about being fat
>I am tremendously defensive about my weight
Yeah, sure.

And I just want to say, you know what? Thanks, but no. I looked fine when I was twenty pounds - even forty pounds - overweight, and no amount of weight loss will change that. I look how I look, just with more or less padding, and telling me I "look better now" makes me wonder where the fuck you've been all of these 27 years. Why does losing weight change how I look? I look the same, only smaller. It's not like I had fucking plastic surgery. It's fat. It's not evil. And I look the exact same as I did a year ago, only now I'm a size 14 or 16 instead of an 18 or 20.

Okay.
Don't take the compliment.
I think you're ugly no matter what you do, so just know you eternally have my disapproval.
Oh, there's actually a picture of you.
I was right, you are ugly.
Well I feel vindicated.
Oooooooh how long has this entry been going on?

Damn, why is the last level of Zelda: Spirit Tracks so fucking hard?

>Zelda
>hard
Oh but I forgot you are dealing with a lot of discrimination, being a woman controlling a male character.
All right one more entry (for real this time) and then I'm going to go face some discrimination myself in FFXIV.

Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that doesn't give a fuck about it?

Considering this is literally the fifteenth (!) post on the subject I'm beginning to doubt your "I don't give a fuck" attitude.

Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that accepts it? That realises that it's just a part of who I am?

Am I the only man in the world who realizes willpower is a thing and that you can be any weight you so choose (within reason [extraordinary circumstances that don't apply to you notwithstanding])?

Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that would rather focus on more important things, like love and respect and a good book, than how many people think I'm pretty or want to fuck me?

Well, you know, you can have the most rocking body ever and it's not going to do a goddamn thing for the unfortunate arrangement of your facial features.

That my worth is not - and should not - be based on how many people look at me? That there is more to me than what you see?

I know she's a fictional video game character but you can be multiple things of worth at once, you realize. Edie, for instance, has a banging body and she's not obnoxious as fuck and she's a killing machine.
These categories aren't mutually exclusive.
Like you can be hot and be a good writer.
I can't think of a solitary example of that exact combination but you get where I'm going with this.

Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that accepts that some people are just fat? And that no amount of help, asked for or otherwise, will change that, because that is just how they are?

I find this personality trait supremely unattractive, more so than being fat, actually. It's this "oh well, what can I do about it? Might as well be happy--" weak-willed, lack of responsibility bullshit that makes you ugly more than the actual rolls.

Am I the only chubby woman in this entire world that was once skinny and preferred to be able to eat things I liked rather than denying a few pleasures just to be what people want me to be?

You know I'm bony as fuck and I "indulge in a few pleasures". Somehow I think you're confusing "indulging" with being a glutton.
In fact, just yesterday I had McDonald's.

That loves a good cake and is never sorry for eating it? That will never apoligise for having a second helping of pie if I can?

You know you could have one serving and probably lose weight.
A little willpower isn't a bad thing, I hope you understand. You're not really denying yourself in the same sense a Yogi might deny himself to attain a state of enlightenment.
That's why people are so fat. NO SECOND HELPING OF PIE!? I AM TRULY LIVING AN AUSTERE LIFESTYLE CURRENTLY.

People are different. We all are different. So why am I the only one who seems to get that this also includes weight?

I can't help but notice your next post is about being a Buddhist woman and I know for fact virtue is of paramount importance in Buddhism and one trait of being virtuous is "right action" which includes not being a glutton or a drunkard, etc.

Also, fuck you, YouTube, for denying me access to my own account because I refuse to sign up for a Google Account. You're a fucking piece of cockshit. Go fuck yourself.

"Abandoning abusive speech... He speaks words that are soothing to the ear, that are affectionate, that go to the heart, that are polite, appealing and pleasing to people at large..."
Hey that Buddha guy seems pretty wise.
Oh well--
Anyway this entry is way too long so I'm going to go take up my burden in FFXIV.

Livejournal GRATE FUN!

Let's watch a Livejournal~
Wait, what?
Yes, this person also keeps a Vlog. That is, a video blog. VBlog. Video blog-- blog itself being short for web log. Video web log web log journal diary thing-- no, gotta stop.

What are your favorite song lyrics, and why?

I thought today's writer's block was actually really good for a change. It's an interesting question, it makes you think-- no problems at all, really.
Oh except THAT CUNT said that it's making assumptions everyone has a favorite song lyric. I bet you're shocked.
Look, if these questions don't apply to you how about you don't answer?
As for my own answer I'm not really sure. There are SO MANY CHOICES.
Currently I'd have to say the first stanza of Cum on Feel the Noize is my favorite song lyric.

We built this city on rock and roll"? SRSLY THAT IS THE HEADER FOR THIS QUESTION?

That's a fail. That's a WORST LYRICS EVER in a question about favorite lyrics FAIL. ROLL THE NEXT CLIP, STEVEN.

LULZ EPIC FAIL xP Mary Mother of Christ my blood is already boiling.
Her tag is "trololol", too.
So in the video juego "Space Marine" there's a mode you can enter called fury mode where killing restores your health faster and all your hits do a ton of damage-- I think I'm preparing to enter that mode myself.

NOT GONNA LIE. I TOTALLY LOVED THE TB FINALE.

I've been MEH about the whole season because, predictably, it's been shit, but that finale. WHUUUUUUUT.

So, yeah, I'm feeling better, and my life is becoming stable and boring again, so I have time for this thing. This doesn't count as an update, but THAT SHIT IS COMING EVEN THOUGH I ALWAYS SAY THAT.

The fuck is this?
What's with you?
Holy shit have I made a grave mistake. All of her posts are like this insane ramble/capslock on and off bullshit. Look, I know you can do the caps thing for effect but it's best to use that sparingly.

So, I keep saying OMG I WILL BE BACK. OMG I AM STILL ALIVE. And I am, and I will, and all that.

But I have exciting news that is definitely going to reinvigorate my blogging. A reboot, of sorts.

MY MOM IS MOVING. AND I AM NOT GOING WITH HER.

a;slfja;lskjf;alskjf;klasjdlfjslhfkasjdf

For those of you who have read this from the beginning, you know about my mom and the struggles I've had with her. So you know that this is huge news. HUGE. I'm panicking and freaking out, but I'm also super excited.

BY THE EMPEROR.
This is the first time I've read something that is seriously giving me a headache because I feel as if the words themselves are screeching at me.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS? Yes, it means I will finally be on my own for the first time EVER in my life. Yes, it means that I will have to learn to, like, DO STUFF. But the most important thing?

I GET TO REDECORATE MY HOUSE.

aslfjalskjfslkfjlsjfakjs;f

So, that's what I'm going to be talking about. I figure it will be a bit interesting.

And yet, if I punch her in the throat so hard it ruins her voice box I go to jail.
NO JUSTICE LEFT IN THE WORLD.

I'm very close to needing a co-op partner for Portal 2. Anyone else playing? I NEED SOMEONE SOON. I'm almost done with the single player, and I'm nearly frothing at the mouth to get started on co-op.

I would rather piss acid than play co-op anything with you.
Okay vlog time.
Ugly and fat, so there is some justice in the world--
She's sharing spam with me.
What the fuck is that in the background?
That's hypnotic.
Oh, it's her foot, great.
How many views does this have?
Oh, 45. Well, I'm going to thumbs down this and move on--
There.
Oh another vlog. About her shopping day at Target.
Show, don't tell, Livejournal.

I should apologize. I've been...well, I've been pretty crap lately. I'm probably one of the most self-absorbed people on the planet, but usually, I can channel that into shameless self-promotion in the form of blog posts and journal entries and whatnot.

At least you admit it?
I think?
Fuck this blog, Jesus.

Oh Jeez

Do you ever think about something not yourself?
After looking at today's writer's block I knew I wouldn't have to search long for a good blog:

It's Stephen King's birthday! Who is your favorite character from one of his books?

>Stephen King
>having a favorite character
I guess that Satan character from The Stand. Randal Flagg or some shit? He was arguably King's most interesting character but he didn't really do anything with him. I find when you base a character around being mysterious it's a great move after a 1,500 page book to offer no exposition or explanation as to what, exactly, he is.

Hmm..
I remember the first full novel I ever read by King was Bag of Bones. I really immediately liked Mike Noonan. But I mean, King always delves so deeply into his narrators, you sort become the person, and it's hard not to get attached. I think I fell in love with Mattie right along with him.

Stephen King has exactly one narrator: angry alcoholic writer.
By sheer coincidence King himself is a writer. And an alcoholic.
I think you're taking the advice of "write what you know" a bit too literally, King. Or maybe he's not and he only knows himself.
I don't know. I don't like being mean to Stephen King as much as I do, say, U2, because Stephen King seems like a nice guy in real life but it's really hard to defend his writing.

Oh, and then there was little Danny Torrence. The Shining was so good. Perfect, even, but more for the style of writing than the characters.

I read that book in 9th grade and even to my primitive 9th grade mind it was painfully apparent he had no idea what he was doing with his story from the beginning.
I feel when it comes to these supernatural horror stories you run into something of a dilemma towards the end. The only part that's suspenseful or scary or tense or whatever is that the monster is unknown, but when you explain it it stops being scary-- or you can opt to not explain it, but then it's going to be a letdown.
I actually have a fairly good idea of getting around this serious issue but I'd like to keep it to myself in case someone beat me to it then I wouldn't look as clever.

Let's see, what else..

I fell in love with Ben when I read It. Plain and simple.
But now that I've been thinking about it, it's hit me:
Nick Andros. Gotta be Nick. Always.

You've read way more Stephen King books than I have.
Stephen King did write one (sort of) legit story, though: The Running Man.
It's not especially well written but it's fairly interesting and does anticipate the notion of reality TV a solid 30 years before it actually happens so it's a vision if nothing else.

I can't even get over how well he was written. So don't even ask me to further explain, I just love him. I'm in love with him. I'm in love with the way he was written. That's enough. I can't put it any other way.

Was my copy of The Stand defective or what's going on here? I didn't see any of that in mine.

He's really annoying me. Hah. This is exactly what happened with Ray. It always happens.
I think I might actually be into somebody. I think I might find somebody that could, eventually, make me feel the way that he did.
But they never wait long enough, LiveJournal. They make it so obvious, and they ask me out after we've been talking for all of two weeks.

This is how this entry starts, incidentally.
Get a drink and get comfortable because this bitch has a lot to say and she isn't in any hurry and she doesn't care if you understand it.

Bad timing.
Just let me fall for you, jeez.

I'm sorry, was I supposed to get a rulebook when I started talking to you?
Also don't fucking flatter yourself, honey. I asked you out. I didn't anticipate this turning into a grand project on par with an award winning Warhammer army.
At least with the Warhams I'd have an awesome vision of the far future. With you I'm just paying for dinner.

You say you don't want to rush things, but then you go and act so awkwardly around me.
If we aren't even comfortable talking, what in the world makes you think..

Sorry, that's just me struggling to hold your end of the conversation up as well as mine.
College girls aren't the conversationalists they seem to think they are.

So Corey comes up to me today, and.. I'm trying to talk to him, you know? The way that we used to. Fuck, the way that we were last week. And he can hardly look at me, he's so afraid of me it's crazy.

Me, afraid of you?
Hang on, let me check the Bible (Warhammer rulebook)--
Uh-oh, I found this line:
No Pity! No Remorse! No Fear!
Emphasis on the last part of that.
Speaking of, there was a boy band in the mid 90s called No Remorse.
Kind of mixed messages I'm getting, here. Gay boy band whose name is NO REMORSE.

So then he asks me for my number.
But he has to do it like an idiot.

"Hey what's your number? I might call you if I take a notion."
If you're going this route (and I cannot recommend this route less. Well, maybe if she were covered in dead plague rats and on fire, but that's only maybe) then you really have to seem uninterested in her.
She's the kind of girl that thrives on that notion of "hard won attention" and you've been stupefied by her, err, "powers of charm" so there's no way she'll take an interest in you now.

"So.. Hedar... This is a really, um, random and stupid question, but... Do you have a phone?"

Give me this yahoo's email address. I need to set him straight.

Oh Jesus Corey if you have to tell me that it's random and stupid, it obviously isn't "Yeah, I have a phone!" shit I really don't want to text you, oh God, no "You want my number?"
"..Y-yeah, if you don't mind."

"No, what gave you that idea? I'm looking to get a new phone and I was wondering what you had."
Seriously dude, you could have her humping your leg like a dog in a week, tops.

He says it's friendly. He keeps saying it, but he isn't acting friendly. He's acting annoying and immature. We aren't in middle school anymore, dude.

You've totally emasculated him and he doesn't have the extensive Space Marine training I do to handle this.
Ah, well, maybe it's for the best. This sort of shit is exactly what makes real life Space Marines, you know.

I miss him today, a tiny bit. Tch.
If I asked him for his number, maybe I'd be stuttering like an idiot, too.
..Actually, no. I'm pretty good at being chill in those situations. I'm fairly smooth. I'd woo it out of him, with an even voice, and a slightly arched eyebrow, and a side-ways smile, and no hint whatsoever at anything more than friendly.

Uh-huh.
So the crux of this problem is he's awkward around her but she's being such a frigid bitch and he's so lovesick he doesn't know what to do about it.
The only rational solution is to drown both of them in ammonia.

We were at lunch today, and my people went to get themselves some baked goods, so we were alone.
He looks at me and says "So.. about dinner, was it definitely a yes?"

Any person who refers to her friends as "her people" isn't someone you want to date.
Seriously the only this cunt could have a more obvious warning is if a fucking air raid siren sounded whenever you approached her.

And I say "Well... I just want friends right now.."
And he pauses for a moment and says "..Oh! Oh well, I mean, I meant it in a friendly kind of way."

"Hey just thought I'd ask but if you hate free dinner then I can find someone else, I'm sure."

And then proceeds to explain to me that while he does have a crush on me, he doesn't want to rush things.

"You know I thought we were cool but I apparently misjudged our relationship. I won't bother you with this again."
For added effect you can also add that you've actually gone out with guy friends before and asking someone to do something isn't automatically a date.
You know, sort of like what you did only not fucking stupid.

And somehow, that's his idea of "friendly". Not rushing. He doesn't seem to get that it isn't about the pace we're setting, it's about the fact that I don't want to set anything with him at all.

The guy is quite clearly into you, so when you say stuff like "I just want to be friends for now" to him the implication there is "someday maybe we'll be an item."
Take whatever brain power he has and put it at 75% and that's what he's working with at best around you. You know this dopiness around girls is very easily tempered in the fires of hate but that requires literally years of intensive cultivation I don't think our boy is prepared to undertake.

He annoyed me today.
I mean honestly? It was friendly, that's all?

>he annoyed me
>HE WAS BEING FRIENDLY (frowny face optional)
See what I mean when I say my strategy would pay off in spades?
You want to be distant and brief, but not rude or condescending. You can be a little bit of a dick to her, though.
For your skill level (absolute fucking beginner I fear) you should probably keep your tactica dominatus simple.

I think I embarrassed him. Because friendly, is asking me at the table surrounded by our friends. Friendly, is inviting some of them, too. Friendly, is having an actual occasion, like a cool movie coming out.

He did that?
Or was that what he should have done?
Either way it sounds like a reasonable thing to say.

Friendly is not making use of the class change to sneak up on me when I'm by myself, and then taking nervous, deep breathes to prepare yourself for the next step, which is stuttering your way to asking me on a dinner date.
Um, no.
Not falling for it.

Heed this failure and see that it does not happen again.

So I turned him down - at least, I hope he got the picture. And of course, I'm mildly embarrassed because he's trying to turn this all onto me, but not really. More like annoyed at the now horribly awkward atmosphere surrounding us.

Are you in high school or college?
I was almost positive college but now I'm leaning towards high school.
You're fucked, I'm afraid, Corey.
Here's a post entitled "I'm Broken, But Don't Fix Me" and I'm debating whether or not I want to read these words.

I'm not sure where I am, exactly, but I've been thinking about where I've been.

Emotionally speaking.
And I think I have some sort of pattern.
I suppose I'll start with the "good" phase.

No fuck it.

"You could... Let me take you to dinner."
And the whole time he was practically shaking with nerves, and I could tell that he was debating whether or not to follow through, and when he did he looked at me with his big, hazel eyes, and he looked so scared, and I..
Just, couldn't say no. "No" didn't even come to mind. I said "yes" and he said "really?" and I confirmed:
Yes.
And went to class.

And then you're pissed later about why he thought you wanted him to take you to dinner.
Gee, I dunno, because he asked and you said yes?
Also am I really reliving this grand tale of adventure on the high seas for a fourth time?

But thinking about it now, I feel kind of sick and reluctant. I mean... I have to go to dinner with him. I have to tell The Mother that a boy wants to take me to dinner. Even worse, she'll probably have to drive me as I am without a license and live so far out that he couldn't pick me up.

Bitch can't even drive and you're getting nervous around her? She should be thanking you for your interest, man.

I was at school..
Montessori school, and I was six,

Oi. Oh, that's when the towers fell. I can figure out how hold you are now~
So let's see. You were six in 2001 so that means you were born sometime in 1995 so that means you're 16.
You know you'd think I'd feel bad about picking on a 16 year old but I don't give a fuck if she's 16 and retarded. She shouldn't be posting this nonsense to Livejournal where anyone can read it.
Oh man this is so fucking boring I can't even stand it. I seriously spent the last five minutes staring out into nothing.
Oh shit I just did it again.
Ohhh I better find something better to do with my time.

Oh Boy

Remember a few updates ago when there was that question about reincarnation and I asked if anyone recalled that cunt who always said "IT'S VERY RUDE OF YOU TO ASSUME EVERYONE BELIEVES IN REINCARNATION and I said I should hunt her answer down but then I was too lazy?
Well, her blog came up while I was searching for one and here's her official response:

I think that reincarnation is one of the stupidest and cruelest myths ever spawned by the mind of man, and that assuming that everyone believes in it is very rude.

Gr8.
Anyway with that bit of merriment out of the way, BEHOLD. Guys, blogs, all are gay, etc.

I've been going through my medicine and vitamin cabinets, and I have a lot of old stuff that I don't want to risk taking anymore. However, I don't want to just throw it out, as I've heard that doing so can be dangerous to lower life forms, the environment, etc.

Take them all at once.
Surely all the bad stuff in one will cancel out all the bad stuff in another and you'll end up with a stomach of placebo.
Pretty sure that's how that should work.

Is there a recommended way to dispose of a) expired or unused medication (both OTC and prescription) and b) old and unused vitamin/mineral supplements? I have a lot of the latter, but a bit of the former, too.

Yeah. A trashcan. Fuck lower lifeforms.

It seems the Fight for the Light expansion pack for DC Universe Online is giving us a little more than they originally said they would:

People still play DC Universe Online?
Serious?

(Yes, yes, I know, some people get e-mail on their mobile phones, but seriously, how large a percentage of their 1.4 million customers have set up e-mail on their mobiles?)

A majority, I'm guessing.
AN EMAIL ON YOUR PHONE?
WHAT YEAR IS THIS, 2011?
WHAT HIGH TECHNOLOGICAL SORCERY IS THIS BULLSHIT?
So now he's going to some convention about video games I guess and they have speakers about dumb boring shit like the social ramifications of video games (zzzz) and here's one of the speeches he's excited to see:

7:00pm: Can RPGs Teach You to Write? (Coronado)

No.
In fact, take this line from the best selling RPG of all time as proof that RPGs can't teach you to write:
HIIIIIIGH AAAAAART

I'm in an absolute total blue funk today.

Yes, I know that other people have it worse than I do. Far worse. I am employed, I am doing something I love doing (the band), I have a house to live in, I have food to eat. That right there puts me above a whole lot of other people, all of whom are just as deserving as I am.

Pussy.
I always love it when pussies preface their whining by saying "I have no right to whine because there are people starving in Africa" like one has anything to do with the other or that even makes any goddamn sense.
Look, if you want to whine, just get it over with. Don't get all self-righteous on me.

But no amount of actual good fortune can account for screwed-up brain chemistry. And right now, my brain chemistry is such that everything feels totally effing awful.

I just want to go home and hide under a rock, because the world is a horrid place and will eat me alive.

Whatever.
Take all those pills you found.

The first second DLC scenario for Dragon Age II came out a few weeks ago, and so I downloaded it and played it. Teri was over, playing Final Fantasy XI on the couch next to me.

GIRLS PLAY FFXI-- no I already knew this.
A friend of mine got a 3 day ban for "harassing" an in game couple that were married in game and wanted to get married in real life and in fact met through the game.
His "harassment" technique included sitting near them.
Apparently Square takes their in game romances seriously.
I later had the intense misfortune of partying with them. The one wouldn't change out of her wedding dress or engagement ring to don proper equipment.
BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, AFTER A WOMAN GETS MARRIED SHE NEVER REMOVES HER WEDDING GOWN.
Her argument was she was a healer and therefore didn't need the stats offered by real armor.
So I decided to party naked with the logic that, as a warrior, I was a damage dealer and not a tank and therefore didn't really need armor.
Somehow she got buttwounded and offended and accused me of not being respectful.
So I called her a stupid cunt and to summon her hasubando (JAPANESE[-ish] FOR HUSBAND BECAUSE IN FFXI WE ARE SO KAWAII [Japanese for "cute"] to her defense. He showed up in like three seconds and started yelling at me.
It was the funniest and most embarrassing thing I've ever seen in a video game.
The other people in the party wanted to fucking murder me for derailing their party, too.
Oh well, losers. Trust me, I saved everyone a huge headache by killing that shit before it got started.
Oh right, blogs.
Oh and the rest is an unfunny nerd joke that makes me want to hit this man in real life.
With a brick.

Do you think that criminals should be able to profit from selling their memoirs, after serving jail time?

Well the way the system is currently set up why shouldn't they be able to? What are you going to do, prevent them from a lucrative endeavor?
I say just kill all criminals so they can't profit off writing their memoirs. Everyone wins.
But no, as we have it, they should be allowed to. America is a capitalist society.

PRO: Someone who has been released from prison has supposedly paid his/her debt to society and ought to be able to earn a living however he/she chooses.

Exactly. End of discussion.

ANTI: However, we know that most ex-convicts are not, in fact, rehabilitated, and many aren't even repentant, so to let them profit from telling the story of their crimes would not only reward them for being criminals, but possibly encourage more criminal behavior in those who read the stories.

Just like violent video games encourage kids to be violent, eh, gamer?
Also their ultimate view on their crime is irrelevant. What, do you want to lock them up until they repent? Why not just cut to the quick and kill them?
My solution is elegant, simple, saves the taxpayers a fuck ton of money and prevents stupid moral quandaries like this one.

There's also the philosophical aspects of the question. For instance, is it acceptable to always restrict the freedom of an at-risk population in order to prevent possible or occasional harm to society? Conversely, is it acceptable to always allow an at-risk population to act freely if it carries risk of possible or occasional harm to society? Is there a way to reach a middle ground, mitigating risk without restricting freedom?

I'm pretty sure they call America "land of the free" so no, you're not allowed to restrict people that way.
Unless you're okay not being the land of the free which frankly I am. Clearly people have shown they can't handle the freedoms they've been granted.
Now I'm getting language tips from this yahoo.

Predicament vs. Dilemma vs. Ambivalence vs. Indifference

Thanks for the bold font I have to fiddle around with now, asshole.
Let's see. A predicament is a particularly difficult, dangerous or unpleasant situation versus a dilemma, which is a situation with two (or more) equally unfavorable outcomes.
Ambivalence, by definition, is uncertainty versus indifference, which by definition is a marked lack of concern or care for a situation.
Does that about cover it, chief?
Yes it does.
Amateurs.

I just got a bill from my auto club for my annual renewal.

Am I really reading about some dick's auto club?
Is this what has become of my life?

Apparently I owe them fifty-five dollars and ninety-five and three ten-trillionths cents.

Do you think they'd dun me for the extra three ten-trillionths of a cent? Or should I round up to $55.96, just to be safe?

Pfft, I dunno, call them?
I've been telling you idiots this forever: rules don't really apply to you if you know how to spin it.
Take me and Disgaea 4. I wanted my Flonne DLC but I preordered too late.
Fucked, you'd think.
Nope, two emails to Gamestop later and I'm enjoying yet another healer (TRIPLE REDUNDANCY UP IN MY PARTY YEAAAAH SON)
I could have played this two ways: I could have been straight with them and hoped they'd take mercy or I could lie. I suspect either would have netted the same result but Gamestop has done some shitbag things to me personally in my life and I believe I've always extolled the virtue of lying on this blog so I felt it my sworn duty to lie my way through.

(EDIT: I called them, and they said it was an error and that I should only pay the $55.95*. The guy on the phone seemed to have no sense of humor about it, either, which is really sad...)

He has no humor about it because it's probably literally the fiftieth call he'd gotten that hour and he's probably halfway between deciding whether or not to quit or fucking kill himself.
Nerds of the world, I have something to tell you: repeating jokes does not make them funnier.
Here's a post about International Women's Day.
To my disappointment this isn't about international women, that is, a day devoted to the delicious brown and yellow girl but instead an international day celebrating women-- I guess.
Let's talk about this yahoo's blog real quick, actually, because this post summarizes succinctly a big problem I have with this moron. Due to the way I process my own entries (I copy each block of text into Notepad first before copying that into my blog to remove any bullshit HTML tags or CSS nonsense) and one positive side effect (there are no negatives to doing this) is it gets rid of hyperlinks because those are created through HTML.
Anyway, here's an unfiltered post:

It's in celebration of the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day.

In related news, my old friend from junior high school, Viveka Davis, is participating in an event called Soul 2 Sole (and, apparently, so is her 72-year-old mother), which is a cross-country walk that will last six-and-a-half months. It started this morning at Oceanside Pier, and it will conclude on September 21st (the International Day of Peace) in Washington D.C.

Kudos to you both, Ms. and Ms. Davis!

I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS READING WIKIPEDIA.
Or, no, excuse me
I DIDN'T KNOW I WAS READING WIKIPEDIA.

When did the preferred spelling of "pyjamas" become "pajamas"?

Considering the word comes from Persian which contains both a 'y' and an 'a' after the 'p' I'm guessing this argument is ultimately pretentious. Also I know for a fact the British still spell it "pyjamas".
Oh man this is boring as fuck.
Time to go~

The Shit

Generic Harry Potter fan ahoy I guess.
She might write fanfiction.
I haven't seen any evidence that she does but Livejournal + Harry Potter fan = it's assumed.

If you could write the next Star Wars movie, what story would you tell? It could be anything: a sequel, prequel, or anything in-between. Describe your adventure in 300 words or less. Our favorite story will receive a Star Wars saga Blu-ray gift pack!

... No one cares about the fucking prequels. No one cares how the toilets got installed on the Death Star except fucking Star Wars nerds and they're so hopelessly pathetic they'll actively boycott a Star Wars video game they've been waiting for for years because they can't pick the color of their lightsaber.
IT'S IMPORTANT TO MY STAR WARS ROLEPLAYING EXPERIENCE HOW ELSE WILL I EXPRESS MY CHARACTER'S SUPER DEEP CHARACTERIZATION UNLESS HIS LIGHTSABER IS YELLOW!?!?!?!?
The only natural thing to do is a sequel but the problem there is the original three are an entire saga told in trilogy form. You'd have to work fifty times harder to make your sequel not feel like an unnecessary appendage. Like teeth in your asshole.
As I understand it in the "Extended Universe" (or "EU" as I learned today. It took me a solid five minutes to realize they weren't talking about Europe) Luke eventually falls to the Dark Side which is curious because that was kind of the pivotal moment of the entire series where Luke is tempted by the Dark Side and ultimately denies it, which ultimately redeems his father, Darth Vader.
You'd think nerds with their love of Star Wars would be able to pick up on pretty fucking basic literary elements but nope.
Anyway I'm really just spinning my wheels at this point because any further Star Wars movies are objectively a bad idea. I guess if you offered me a fuck ton of money to do it I could come up with something like, I don't know-- Han Solo adventures or some shit. Basically I'd just try to pander as hard as I could to nostalgia. Get an older Han who acts more like Indiana Jones so you can cross those wires in peoples' brains-- I dunno. It'd suck but it'd probably get good reviews due to nostalgia goggles.
I guess the point I'm trying to make is you can't make a legitimately good movie but you can do a good homage. Maybe. Of course the alien creature that lives in Lucas' hideously distended and swollen neck would probably take over and we'd have another five hour saga of tortured dialogue from two cardboard cutouts and the most embarrassing attempt at romance I've ever seen in my entire life.

I would love to see the story of what happens between RotS and ANH.

No idea what this shit means.

So, my story, would be about what happens between the two. I want to see the training Obi-Wan does. Obviously, it's a way to communicate with the Force Ghosts, but I'd like to see that. And, I'd like a bit more of a backstory on Han. Because we don't know a whole lot about him. We know he's a smuggler.

That's not really what makes his character interesting or complex, though. He starts out as this giant space bastard and is kind of humanized-- ugh forget it.
Christ you people are thick.

But that's about it. I'd love a bit more of a backstory on Han. And the story of Leia is lacking a bit too. I'd love to see more development on her. And I want to see how the Empire grows. So here's my little "story", if you will.

I don't really care.

The Galaxy is in a state of unrest. War has broken out and the Galactic Empire is in control.
The Emperor has his apprentace, Darth Vader, in charge of overseeing the construction on
the most powerful weapon in the Galaxy, the Death Star.

Spelled "apprentice" wrong there, chief.

OH! I've been watching a lot of Glee lately. I got Season 1 on sale at Target the other day. It was like, 20 bucks. So of course I had to get it. I couldn't pass that up. Probably better in the long run. I wanted to get part two of season 1, since I already have part one. But yeah. *Shrugs*

Jesus I thought I was rambling and grasping at nothing with my Star Wars rant.
Am I really reading about how some dumb bimbo bought Glee DVDs?
Is this what has become of my life?

And I broke my bank account the other day getting a new charger for Lappy. He has issues. He really needs a new battery. And a new disc drive. And Geek Squad wasn't much help. I'm sure I needed a new charger. But I still feel like I wasted money somehow. Poor Lappy.

CHOPPY SENTENCES: THE WAY TO GO.
Also are you really referring to an inanimate object by gender? And you've named it? Are you shitting me?
Also I like how you blame the Geek Squad for parts breaking on an integrated system. You do realize the DVD drive isn't really a separate, replaceable part on a laptop, right? I mean I guess someone with a fair (and I do mean fair) bit of technological savvy could replace it but it'd probably be cheaper and easier to buy an external disc drive. Assuming you can be assed to lug a separate drive about. I sure couldn't be. I'd just torrent any disc image I needed.
But, again, that implies technological knowledge sufficient enough that you wouldn't need to consult with the Geek Squad.

I remember, exactly where I was when the Towers were struck.

I was in my Freshmen year of high school. I was in first hour, which was band.

Holy shit that makes us about the same age.
I thought for sure I was saying mean things to some 16 year old.
Two posts about 9/11--
well, I didn't have a 9/11 post so she took mine. Let's go with that.

And, today, I've done some career thought. And I think, between the love of theatre, and my want to help people, that maybe I should look into Drama Therapy. Yes, it exists. And it sounds really interesting. So, I'm gonna look into it more. But it looks like if I want to study it, I need to either go to San Francsico or NYC. If I apply, and get into both, I'll go wherever it's cheaper, and if I get grants/loans/scholarships, whichever place I get more money. And, whichever city is less dangerous and whichever city is cheaper to live in, as that's a factor too. But yeah. I think it's worth a shot to look into.

Oh look, another event in FFXIV.
What is this? I like all these neat medals. I wonder how many Edie would have--
I'm taking one of her medals from her for acting like a dumb slut yesterday, though. I clearly hit my heavy shot macro (3) and that somehow turned into a quick nock (macro 0) that hit 5 different enemies.
I don't even understand how that happens. I couldn't have accidentally hit 0 instead of 3 because they're literally on the opposite side of the keyboard and I know for a fact I hit 3.
Maybe she got a little kill crazy.
I FUCKING HIT THE RIGHT MACRO HOW IS THE WRONG MACRO TRIGGERING? FUCK THIS GAME.

So, I think I finally got the hang on potion making. ((I got onto Pottermore last Friday. So, I've been there a little over a week.)) I really haven't done much within that week. Dueling has been down, and I've gone through all the pages, and I was pretty bad at it.

Pottermore, as I understand it, is a Facetube-esque Harry Potter game.
If you got into the closed beta you could sell your code on eBay for literally hundreds.

And Hufflepuff is down by 684 points. Come on Puffs! WE CAN DO IT!

But yeah. Pottermore is going well, and now that I've got the hang of Potions, I'm enjoying it more.

I don't know what a Hufflepuff is but if that's a faction I'm joining any other than them.
Seriously, expecting something called "Hufflepuff" to win?
What is their logo? Two penises fighting over a mustache?
Oh there's the logo of Hufflepuff, in fact. Looks like some sort of weasel.
Apparently the choices are a lion, a badger, a snake or an eagle.
I think I see the lamest one in that bunch. If you remember back to last entry when I (embarrassingly) took the same Harry Potter quiz it called me the lion one. FUCK YEAH LIONS ARE THE BEST ANIMAL.

It's really hitting me that the last Harry Potter movie is Thursday. And I want to cry and cry and cry. I got tickets for a special showing of DH 1 before DH 2. So Maegan and I are going to that. No questions asked. We're going. And I've been watching the marathon on ABC Family this weekend. And it's just making me tear up. I guess Harry Potter means a lot more to me than I thought it did. That's not a bad thing. It's just really hitting me now.

Fucking hell.
Speaking of lions being the best, I remember when Animal Planet had that show about "what if animals that would never fight each other in real life fought?" and the lion always got punked out.
I seriously think the lion lost to everything including wild dogs. I think they just hate lions.

Um...hmmm...whatelse is going on? Not a whole lot. Watched the Princess Bride the other day. I love that movie. So much. And I painted my nails. Haven't done that in a little while.

PAINTED YOUR NAILS HELL YEAH EVENTFUL EVENING. I'M SO GLAD YOU'RE TELLING ME ABOUT IT IN WRITING.
That implies I'd like it if she told me in person. Let me clarify: I don't care about this in any form of expression.

I played some Lego Star Wars today. God I love that game. I finally got past Degohbah on ESB. I'm just about done with it. ESB that is.

I can't believe how many acronyms Star Wars has. It's almost half as many as pussy sensitivity.
Ohhhh goodness.
Anyway I think I'm going to go play Disgaea 4.

No hero left in man

Hold your butts because we have a woman who fancies herself a writer.
VIRGIN
TERRITORY

In the next life, who or what do you think you’ll be reincarnated into?

Uuuuuuh. Remember that woman a few posts back who was constantly "THIS ASSUMES WE GET REINCARNATED. A BETTER QUESTION WOULD BE..."? She was such a Christfag. I can only imagine her reaction to this question. I should go back and look.
Nah fuck it.

Statistically speaking, probably a plant, insect, or some other single-celled organism.
What would I want to be? A bird. It'd be sort of nice, I think.

>Bringing logic and math into a question about FUCKING REINCARNATION
Also:
>implying plants and insects are single celled

Sean has been bringing home rhyming books to read for homework. Today, he got "Rhymes With Block."

Jock
Knock
...
Cock
Oh, lock
MOCK
FUCK YEAH I AM AWESOME AT KINDERGARTEN HOMEWORK.

Why is it the first word I thought of was "glock"? Definitely my father's daughter, I guess. :P

HAR HAR HAR shut up, cunt.

I wish authors of both sexes would stop perpetuating the notion that a guy will get the girl if he chases, pesters, and/or stalks her enough. It's not romantic. It's demeaning to women.

I don't read books written after 1970.

And it doesn't matter how rude the woman is so long as she's pretty (as these damsels always are). Really, love is being used as a justification for sociopathic tendencies. It's often played off as "She's just playing hard to get."

It is a fucking fictional story, you know.
I read a ton of shit that's basically ultraviolence and I play violent video games. Do I want to murder every person I meet?
Nearly, but that's not because I play violent video games.

Because when a woman says no, that's *never* what she means. To see major female characters promoting rape culture...it's disgusting, and it needs to stop.

Rape culture. There's nothing quite as sobering as getting called a rapist because you're a man. In an educational setting. By a woman. Getting paid for this.
Oh yeah, that happened to me once. Apparently we're going off ultra-conservative Christian logic in this ultra Liberal campus. "Thought about sex? WELL DID SHE DIRECTLY CONSENT TO BE YOUR MASTURBATORY FANTASY? RAPIST."
No, that's not how the logic went. Apparently simply by existing in a first world country I'm in some way supporting rape and racism. I guess. I don't know once I heard that I kind of checked out and started playing Tetris.

Like all those people who think "Every Breath You Take" is a love song, not some stalker song. Even though Sting himself said it was the latter.

And let's not forget -- men are the smart ones, while women have to be attractive to garner any time of day. These attitudes come straight from the women, too.

/feministrage

>Having women characters in your stories

I seriously hope you guys don't do this.
Now here's a book review like I give a shit.

Now for the gripes, albeit minor ones:

Like McCarthy in "The Road," Frazier foregoes quotation marks in "Nightwoods" but not for the same reason. This novel doesn't share the same minimalistic conversation style, and therefore dialogue looks poorly edited

>Cormack McCarthy
>not poorly edited nonsense
Wow we sure live in different realities.
Also who was it that said The Road was the most significant book written in the last fifty years?
Were they on drugs?

If it starts a paragraph, there's a dash. If it occurs mid-paragraph, it just looks like he forgot to put quotes in. Often, you can't tell if Luce is thinking to herself or talking aloud until a "she said" pops up mid-paragraph. It makes the story feel schizophrenic.

NO IT'S POSTMODERN DON'T YOU GET IT? WHO NEEDS QUOTES ANYWAYS?
I'm going to write a story about a pansexual feminist furry communist fascist Native American shaman who magically switches gender every other paragraph and your challenge, as the reader, is to guess the gender.
I'm calling it "Ode to Livejournal: Time to Die"

Too many points of view. When it was just Luce and Bud, the story had a great flow to it. Then he added Stubblefield, whose storyline had me confused; he's the grandson of Old Stubblefield, not the old guy in a flashback time period.

First thing I think when I hear "told from multiple points of view" is "there probably isn't a good reason to do that." In fact, I'm seriously wracking my brain right now and I can really only think of two or maybe three instances where the "multiple points of view" thing works to the benefit of the story. There was a Warhammer comic that told a period of the Black Templar's chapter from three points of view and the reader finds out at the end all three characters are actually the same person and it's kind of a "look what time can do to someone" that was surprisingly deep for a fucking Warhammer comic. Then there was Rashomon which was all about perspective and misinterpreting shit-- can't think of a third one, actually.

Awesome video about how advertising has driven women's perception of body image. Definitely worth watching. I wish more women would stand up and fight this (and judging by "Modelland" you too, Tyra).

>video is 23 minutes
>there's a part two
not happening.
I think I might have actually seen this for a pussy sensitivity class--
maybe.

There's a great article over on Alternet about how debt and the free-market policies of the 80's drove Africa into a state of famine. Tragic and quite a shame that legitimate news organizations are ignoring the subject.

What about the fact that the US alone sends enough food to Africa to feed every person comfortably every single year and the food just rots in storage?
You-- you can't help people when their country has no infrastructure and their warlords are happy to use food as a weapon.

Now that I'm finished with that, I consolidated all the files on my computer and finally switched over to Mike's previous computer (thank you, external, hard drive, for making the process a snap). I have a few more things to settle in, but it's mostly done. The fan in mine was terribly squeaky and loud, and the hard drive would occasionally make awful sounds when I accessed the external drive.

You got a new computer because your fan was too loud.
Are you fucking kidding me?

A study from UCLA reports that tweens value "fame" as their #1 value. Self-acceptance ranks 8, behind such gems as popularity, financial success, and power. It's a sad day when hedonism makes the top-10 and benevolence doesn't.

Did you just confuse self-acceptance for benevolence?
Those two things are entirely unrelated, you realize.
Also I'd wager you could have interviewed tweens in 1390 and the list would have looked very much the same. Tweens and early teens are assholes.

Mike and I went to see Captain America today. idk, I could've used a lot less of the energy weapons. It was the 40's after all, and every single one of the bad guys had them.

I think I just found a reason why you're a shitty author. I've never encountered a situation, real or fictional, and thought "this doesn't need energy weapons."
Here's a quiz about which HARRY POTTER HOUSE I'D BE SORTED INTO!
FINALLY A QUIZ ABOUT WHICH HARRY POTTER HOUSE I'LL GET SORTED INTO!
Fucking hell.
Bitch is mental if she thinks I'm taking this.
.. Okay I took it and it called me brave, chivalrous and courageous despite admitting that I'd willingly do some shady shit for personal profit and wait for opportune times to attack enemies.
Pretty sure that's the opposite of chivalry, actually.
Quiz is fucked, man.

I was browsing the school handbook today, and I was a little bit miffed at some of the things a kid can get suspended for. Unauthorized distribution of printed material? Littering? Repeated truancy? lol, sounds like suspending them is totally the answer for that.

AND THE ONE DAY THE FUCKER BOTHERS TO SHOW UP IS THE DAY I'M GETTING REVIEWED-- sorry.

And because self-defense doesn't get you out of punishment for fighting, if someone picks a fight with you, make sure you f*cking FINISH HIM.

Students cannot trade food in the cafeteria?? How random is that?

Personally I'd make the rules stricter and far, far harder to follow. I'd get rid of lunch and actively disallow eating in the school to force students to be cunning.
Most tests would be literally impossible for them to pass without cheating, and they'd fail if they get caught cheating.
Need more innovation and caution in today's society I feel.
Well this has been a riveting bit of nonsense but I think I'm going to do something else now.