This journal is (mostly) friends-only, due to my recognising my spastic and overly-emotional tendencies. If you would rather be spared that and just would like to read the lulz (which are posted public), feel free to add me!
Like all blogs, this can be safely ignored as bullshit because, as I'm about to demonstrate, there are many entries of which a reader can partake.
LUUUUCKY ME~
What’s your favorite kind of weather?
That is making a huge assumption that people have a favorite kind of weather.
My BFF Givegodtheglory didn't update today so I'm taking her mantle of smug douchecunt for now.
Delicious early fall early mornings, usually before the sun comes up or just before. The air is so crispy and chilly it wakes you right up, and yet it doesn't permeate your skin and chill you to the bone. The air has a kind of solitary, only-person-on-earth feeling, and yet it's so wonderful you don't mind so much.
yeah, yeah shut up.
This entry was really an exercise in purple prose and "how much of a total twat can I be?"
I love best to just curl up outside with a poncho and some tea or cocoa and just listen to everything wake up while I enjoy the cold. The beauty of it takes me away, and keeps me in place, if that makes sense.
My favorite weather pattern is rain.
There.
WAS THAT SO HARD?
Woooow now there are three entries in a row that are her Tweets.
You must really think a lot of yourself if you have to copy and paste your Twats from Twatter on Livejournal and think anyone gives a fuck.
Here we go, a rant called "Girly and Manly" with a cut "Feminism".
Looking forward to this--
You know, women gamers put up with a lot that we're not given credit for.
Women gamers put up with a lot-- if it bothers you just stop doing it.
I've said this a million billion times but if you have a hobby that's no longer fun or enjoyable to you just stop doing it. No one is making you play the juegos, you know.
Like, what, am I supposed to give you credit for being brave and playing video games?
What, are you out of your fucking mind?
Well if playing the juegos is something worthy of praise then I'd like you to praise me for beating Demon's Souls, one of the hardest games ever.
I'd additionally like praise for knowing Mega Man X so well I can basically speedrun it without trying.
I'd also like additional praise for CHECK THIS FUCKING SHIT OUT, GUYS:
YEAAAAH BLADEDANCER BOOTS.
Best boots in the game you are all mad jelly.
If you're like my sisters and I, you were raised with gaming at a very young age. As such, we always had to place our emotions and actions behind a male protagonist - and hardly ever did we complain.
Oh, that's what you deserve praise for.
Well my Final Fantasy XI and Final Fantasy XIV character were both women and you don't hear me pitching a bitch, do you?
In fact, I actively selected a female character when I could have picked a male. I am far, far more noble and worthy than you if this is what is worth praise to you.
... I'd like to emphasize that I'm applying "worthy" in the classic sense, not that I'm being self entitled. "Worthy" in the classic sense meaning generally good or adept at whatever or an all-around good guy to get shit done.
For us, it never took away from the game, nor did it really matter that they were male. We were able to adapt to a male-dominant virtual world.
Well I think this entry has proven when I want a game about whining and period cramping then I'll look to a female protagonist but when I want to kill dragons and demons then I'm going to have to side with men.
Also I'd like to mention Edie learned yet another bow skill that's basically machine gunning arrows. I guess this one is more of a shotgun: barrage shoots 4 arrows at once.
So there's an ability that lets you nock up to 3 arrows, an ability that instantly nocks 3 arrows, an ability that machine guns 5 arrows and now an ability that shotguns 4 arrows.
Jesus Christ Edie, calm down.
I don't think I've seen this much bloodlust and ultraviolence since I saw a Space Marine stab an Ork through the head to regain HP.
Something Edie can do too, incidentally.
And yet when games nowadays come out with female protagonists they are (generally, here) passed over by the majority of male gamers, who for some reason find playing such games akin to getting castrated. Why is that?
I don't know, why don't you tell me?
I'd like to mention that in PSO, my favorite game of all time, One of my three main characters was a girl and when I retired from that game she was the highest level.
So please, do go on. I know exactly what you're talking about currently.
It's the same with books. Young girls and women have no problem getting behind a male protagonist and reading books by males, but dare give books to boys or guys by female authors or female protagonists, and you're (generally) snorted at and told that "that's chick-lit".
Edie started out kind of a cute character but I wouldn't fuck with her now. She's proven to have several Space Marine abilities and be cunningly brutal as well as brutally cunning.
She's basically just one ability short called something like "pentagram soul suck horror" of being a super villain.
Males deprive themselves of really good characters when they do this, but are never even told such. And yet when women actively seek out fiction written by women or starring females, they're labelled as (generally) anti-male. Why is that?
Most nerds I know hold Final Fantasy VI in the highest of esteem and its main protagonist is female.
In fact, arguably two of its three main protagonists are women.
Final Fantasy Tactics, too. Main characters, I would have to say, would be Ramza, Delita, Ovelia and Alma, two of which are women.
Even the very masculine Halo has a woman main character. Sure she's not the main character, but she's of significant import.
I think. I've never played Gaylo.
Also the beloved Metroid series stars a woman and Super Metroid especially is typically regarded as one of the best games ever made.
So no, I'm not really following you here.
I'm sure you'd argue Metroid doesn't count because Samus Aran isn't really observably female through most of the game (I thought she was a robot when I was a kid) but that's kind of bullshit and sexist too because that implies women have to look different simply because they're women in the grimdark far future when power armor exists. I mean she is covered completely in armor, it's not like you have to accommodate for female features when you're 500 pounds of armor.
Is it the way we are raised, in a society so biased on gender-division? Boys toys and girls toys, boys clothes and girls clothes (so much to the point of actually making the way shirts and pants open and close differently for each sex), boys books and girls books, boys sports and girls sports, hen parties and stag parties, ect ect ect... Yeah, I understand that boys and girls are different in obvious ways, but do we have to indict it so much in ways so extreme?
I don't know, you're the one whining about no female protagonists in video games.
Why do we assume a guy is "girly" because he enjoys the colour pink or writes poetry?
... Because he is?
Except Ben Jonson. The only poet who wasn't a complete fag.
In fact he beat someone to death over the accusation.
Now there's a hardcore motherfucker.
Why do we assume a girl is "butch" because her hair is short and enjoys cars?
... Because she is?
To me, the reason why feminism is not only stalled, but spiralling backwards in some ways, is because of our inability to even admit the above. If we admit it, we would finally be admitting the problem, and recognising that things need to change. But we are too lazy as a society, and thus nothing gets changed.
I think the reason feminism is stalled is because you've already won all the rights you deserve. Pretty much what remains is hard work and individual merit but that's somehow not equal enough for you still.
It's basically a determent at this point in time. You don't need a super special secret club anymore, women. It's time to shed the relics of the past and join integrated society.
It is the poison of male privilege in our culture, that men are so used to being considered the norm and women a "deviation from that norm".
Says one comment.
I'll tell you what: when you can shoot 15 arrows in the span of 10 seconds you can do whatever the fuck you want and I won't say shit.
I had dreams that I was Lina Inverse, but still going to my high school.
Don't give a shit--
Lina Inverse is from the animu Slayers, incidentally.
If she were Lina Inverse this blog would be interesting so I know this is a complete FIIIICTION.
I haven't shaved in a couple of days but I'm wearing shorts. Do you think anyone will notice?
I don't think anyone cares that much.
I'm really starting to enjoy meditation. I sometimes actually crave it. I'll be reading, and then my eyes slide to my straw cushion, and I'll end up putting the book down and doing zazen for like, fifteen minutes.
Truly you have mastered Zen.
Craving and desires: POINT OF BUDDHISM.
The longest I've sat is only a half-hour, but hey, I'm a newbie. Leave me alone.
You're not prepared for knowing without knowing, I'm just going to put that out there.
Here's a post entitled "You Know What Irks Me?" and no I don't, but I'm sure I'm about to discover what.
When entitled people bitch about things not being perfect enough for them.
Yes, it totally sucks that LJ was down for several days last week. But put things into perspective for once, would you?
And what a great few days those were.
While it may have been unwise to sell their servers to Russia, that doesn't mean they deserve to have their servers attacked with DDoS due to censorship spats. No server, no matter who they are, deserves that.
While I might call that a bit hypocritical I don't necessarily see the problem--
DDoSing is a fact of life when you're a server--
So whining that LJ should do more about it, that permanent accounts should get cookies, that paid accounts should get gold, is ridiculous. Permanent users, you all had a one-time fee, and you get more than what paid members get; I think it's fair for those of us who pay to get compensated.
Hey wait a minute. Aren't you entitled and yet you're bitching?
Huh.
However, paid users, that doesn't mean we deserve more than two weeks - two weeks is GENEROUS, since we were only inconvenienced ONE WEEK. I wouldn't start looking gift horses just in the mouth if I were you.
*jumps off the soapbox and goes to eat some cereal*
Gross.
Oh right, I'm sorry. I forgot you aren't entitled. You have to deal with the tremendous discrimination that is playing video games and being a female at the same time.
Here's the thing. I don't mind being fat, in the long run. I mind occasionally when I have to fit into a swimsuit, or strip naked in front of Terry, but for the most part, I don't give a shit.
Therefore, it really gets my goat that now, when people notice I've lost a significant amount of weight due to being sick, and they tell me I look "good now", I want to ask them what the fuck that is supposed to mean, even though I know full well what it means.
It means that fat is unattractive. Fat is not nice. Fat is ugly, and if you can get rid of it through any means, you are successful. It doesn't matter if your insides are rebelling against you and the loss is a result, if you have lost that weight, you are a winner.
>I don't give a shit about being fat
>I am tremendously defensive about my weight
Yeah, sure.
And I just want to say, you know what? Thanks, but no. I looked fine when I was twenty pounds - even forty pounds - overweight, and no amount of weight loss will change that. I look how I look, just with more or less padding, and telling me I "look better now" makes me wonder where the fuck you've been all of these 27 years. Why does losing weight change how I look? I look the same, only smaller. It's not like I had fucking plastic surgery. It's fat. It's not evil. And I look the exact same as I did a year ago, only now I'm a size 14 or 16 instead of an 18 or 20.
Okay.
Don't take the compliment.
I think you're ugly no matter what you do, so just know you eternally have my disapproval.
Oh, there's actually a picture of you.
I was right, you are ugly.
Well I feel vindicated.
Oooooooh how long has this entry been going on?
Damn, why is the last level of Zelda: Spirit Tracks so fucking hard?
>Zelda
>hard
Oh but I forgot you are dealing with a lot of discrimination, being a woman controlling a male character.
All right one more entry (for real this time) and then I'm going to go face some discrimination myself in FFXIV.
Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that doesn't give a fuck about it?
Considering this is literally the fifteenth (!) post on the subject I'm beginning to doubt your "I don't give a fuck" attitude.
Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that accepts it? That realises that it's just a part of who I am?
Am I the only man in the world who realizes willpower is a thing and that you can be any weight you so choose (within reason [extraordinary circumstances that don't apply to you notwithstanding])?
Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that would rather focus on more important things, like love and respect and a good book, than how many people think I'm pretty or want to fuck me?
Well, you know, you can have the most rocking body ever and it's not going to do a goddamn thing for the unfortunate arrangement of your facial features.
That my worth is not - and should not - be based on how many people look at me? That there is more to me than what you see?
I know she's a fictional video game character but you can be multiple things of worth at once, you realize. Edie, for instance, has a banging body and she's not obnoxious as fuck and she's a killing machine.
These categories aren't mutually exclusive.
Like you can be hot and be a good writer.
I can't think of a solitary example of that exact combination but you get where I'm going with this.
Am I the only chubby woman in the entire world that accepts that some people are just fat? And that no amount of help, asked for or otherwise, will change that, because that is just how they are?
I find this personality trait supremely unattractive, more so than being fat, actually. It's this "oh well, what can I do about it? Might as well be happy--" weak-willed, lack of responsibility bullshit that makes you ugly more than the actual rolls.
Am I the only chubby woman in this entire world that was once skinny and preferred to be able to eat things I liked rather than denying a few pleasures just to be what people want me to be?
You know I'm bony as fuck and I "indulge in a few pleasures". Somehow I think you're confusing "indulging" with being a glutton.
In fact, just yesterday I had McDonald's.
That loves a good cake and is never sorry for eating it? That will never apoligise for having a second helping of pie if I can?
You know you could have one serving and probably lose weight.
A little willpower isn't a bad thing, I hope you understand. You're not really denying yourself in the same sense a Yogi might deny himself to attain a state of enlightenment.
That's why people are so fat. NO SECOND HELPING OF PIE!? I AM TRULY LIVING AN AUSTERE LIFESTYLE CURRENTLY.
People are different. We all are different. So why am I the only one who seems to get that this also includes weight?
I can't help but notice your next post is about being a Buddhist woman and I know for fact virtue is of paramount importance in Buddhism and one trait of being virtuous is "right action" which includes not being a glutton or a drunkard, etc.
Also, fuck you, YouTube, for denying me access to my own account because I refuse to sign up for a Google Account. You're a fucking piece of cockshit. Go fuck yourself.
"Abandoning abusive speech... He speaks words that are soothing to the ear, that are affectionate, that go to the heart, that are polite, appealing and pleasing to people at large..."
Hey that Buddha guy seems pretty wise.
Oh well--
Anyway this entry is way too long so I'm going to go take up my burden in FFXIV.
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