Livejournal GRATE FUN!

Let's watch a Livejournal~
Wait, what?
Yes, this person also keeps a Vlog. That is, a video blog. VBlog. Video blog-- blog itself being short for web log. Video web log web log journal diary thing-- no, gotta stop.

What are your favorite song lyrics, and why?

I thought today's writer's block was actually really good for a change. It's an interesting question, it makes you think-- no problems at all, really.
Oh except THAT CUNT said that it's making assumptions everyone has a favorite song lyric. I bet you're shocked.
Look, if these questions don't apply to you how about you don't answer?
As for my own answer I'm not really sure. There are SO MANY CHOICES.
Currently I'd have to say the first stanza of Cum on Feel the Noize is my favorite song lyric.

We built this city on rock and roll"? SRSLY THAT IS THE HEADER FOR THIS QUESTION?

That's a fail. That's a WORST LYRICS EVER in a question about favorite lyrics FAIL. ROLL THE NEXT CLIP, STEVEN.

LULZ EPIC FAIL xP Mary Mother of Christ my blood is already boiling.
Her tag is "trololol", too.
So in the video juego "Space Marine" there's a mode you can enter called fury mode where killing restores your health faster and all your hits do a ton of damage-- I think I'm preparing to enter that mode myself.

NOT GONNA LIE. I TOTALLY LOVED THE TB FINALE.

I've been MEH about the whole season because, predictably, it's been shit, but that finale. WHUUUUUUUT.

So, yeah, I'm feeling better, and my life is becoming stable and boring again, so I have time for this thing. This doesn't count as an update, but THAT SHIT IS COMING EVEN THOUGH I ALWAYS SAY THAT.

The fuck is this?
What's with you?
Holy shit have I made a grave mistake. All of her posts are like this insane ramble/capslock on and off bullshit. Look, I know you can do the caps thing for effect but it's best to use that sparingly.

So, I keep saying OMG I WILL BE BACK. OMG I AM STILL ALIVE. And I am, and I will, and all that.

But I have exciting news that is definitely going to reinvigorate my blogging. A reboot, of sorts.

MY MOM IS MOVING. AND I AM NOT GOING WITH HER.

a;slfja;lskjf;alskjf;klasjdlfjslhfkasjdf

For those of you who have read this from the beginning, you know about my mom and the struggles I've had with her. So you know that this is huge news. HUGE. I'm panicking and freaking out, but I'm also super excited.

BY THE EMPEROR.
This is the first time I've read something that is seriously giving me a headache because I feel as if the words themselves are screeching at me.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS? Yes, it means I will finally be on my own for the first time EVER in my life. Yes, it means that I will have to learn to, like, DO STUFF. But the most important thing?

I GET TO REDECORATE MY HOUSE.

aslfjalskjfslkfjlsjfakjs;f

So, that's what I'm going to be talking about. I figure it will be a bit interesting.

And yet, if I punch her in the throat so hard it ruins her voice box I go to jail.
NO JUSTICE LEFT IN THE WORLD.

I'm very close to needing a co-op partner for Portal 2. Anyone else playing? I NEED SOMEONE SOON. I'm almost done with the single player, and I'm nearly frothing at the mouth to get started on co-op.

I would rather piss acid than play co-op anything with you.
Okay vlog time.
Ugly and fat, so there is some justice in the world--
She's sharing spam with me.
What the fuck is that in the background?
That's hypnotic.
Oh, it's her foot, great.
How many views does this have?
Oh, 45. Well, I'm going to thumbs down this and move on--
There.
Oh another vlog. About her shopping day at Target.
Show, don't tell, Livejournal.

I should apologize. I've been...well, I've been pretty crap lately. I'm probably one of the most self-absorbed people on the planet, but usually, I can channel that into shameless self-promotion in the form of blog posts and journal entries and whatnot.

At least you admit it?
I think?
Fuck this blog, Jesus.

Let's not miss a post Monday

WHEW JUST UNDER THE WIRE AND I GOTTA MAKE THIS QUICK BECAUSE I HAVE TO GET TO BED AND I CAN'T STOP TYPING LIKE THIS.

Do you have a childhood friend that you still think about and miss? What happened to him or her?

NOOOOOO I HAVE NO FRIENDS.

David Carlson. He was my friend for four days. i met him the summer before my freshman year, he was on a church retreat and i was camping with my family. he drew me some pictures and left me his address and about a year later i found the letter i wrote him, unopened, among some papers in my dad's office. my parents had intercepted the letter because i was thirteen and he was nineteen and they were afraid he was a "creep" or something and didn't want me to get raped.

Pfffft. Parents and their misplaced concern that some 19 year old guy might be inappropriate with a pubescent girl.
Like that's ever happened before, am I right?

How important is physical attraction in selecting a romantic partner?

Fairly and if you say anything different you're a LIAR.

i'm going to answer this because it's actually a question that's been knocking around in my head for some time now, because i have a potential partner in the friend zone who i know wants to take it to the next level, but also doesn't know exactly how i feel because i am intentionally keeping him in the dark.

Wait, why? Bait a guy a long, jeez.

i'm pretty sure he knows this and is confused by it, but added to the list of his many virtues and attributes is that he is too much the gentleman to bring it up, and too fond of my conversation and company to potential endanger it with such a subject.

Well I guess he is a pussy in this case but really, stop being a manipulative cunt.
Also, bro: The Plan. I've laid it all out, all you have to do is follow it.

the fact that ninety percent of our communication is through text or IM is what creates that grey area. i don't know if i could actually be happy with him, because there are physical aspects about him that i don't like (we have actually talked about it before, so it's not like i'm being shallow).

I don't think that's how not being shallow works but whatever.

but when i don't spend time with him, and instead am communicating with him solely through messages, i could honestly say that being in a relationship with him would answer exactly to all of my ideals and expectations.

Oh okay. As long as you have a good justification.

so the answer to the question is, physical attraction is incredibly important in selecting a romantic partner. because, right now at least, i feel as though he is just the only incredibly important, completely irreplaceable, good friend i have- but i can't be "in love" with him because the chemistry isn't there.

That's really interesting. I'm glad I wasted time I could have spent sleeping reading this.
Here's her "to do" list because she's "disheartened" and if this is the work disheartening her then what the fuck, man?

~write this post
~take a shower
~make my powerpoint for class
~clean my room
~clean floors?
~finish my pink dress, at least, and then see what i can do to make the green dress less frumpy
~go shopping with Helen and Natane for lingerie!!

Two of these things are recreational and a PowerPoint for class, really?
TAKE TEN MINUTES AND FINISH THE FUCKING THING.
And move on with your life.

I've discovered that i'm not naive, i'm simply idealistic. the things i believe in (or don't believe in) are not from lack of personal experience, but more from the sincere and true faith in human nature.

Uh-huh.
I don't even know how to address this. Faith in human nature? Faith? In human nature?
Shit ain't logical, man.

If your astrological sign has changed, do you think your personality more resembles your current or past sign?

Yeah I heard all about this (and by "all about this" I mean I saw a story about it on Yahoo about two months ago and thought "huh, that seems really interesting and boring.")
But all I could think with the addition of a thirteenth Zodiac that A. Final Fantasy Tactics is completely fucked now because that entire game revolves around the Zodiac and B. that whole thing with the Space Wolves from Warhammer wherein "circling the thirteenth stone" is bad luck because the Thirteenth Great Company turned traitor or was lost in the Warp (depending on when you ask) and-- wait, what was I even talking about?
Fuck me I need to go to sleep now.
THIS WHOLE WORKING THING SUCKS, MAN.

What the fuuuuuuck

Oh right, this. My entire schedule has been thrown off lately because the air conditioner done broke. Anyway here's the Monday entry on Wednesday. Deal with it, nerds.
I found this group called "Atheist Parents" which is as annoying as a group called "Christian Parents", honestly. I hate everyone.
As rousing as it would be to review this community in its entirety (and believe me I could) I still think it's better to single one of these assholes out.
Actually yeah on second thought let's go for the community as a whole. Fuck it.

Interesting thing happened today; one of my first quandaries as an atheist parent.

HI GUYS ATHEIST PARENT HERE DON'T HIT ON ME SILLY BOYS~

Basically, my son had gotten a $25 gift certificate to T.J. Maxx, so I took him there today to pick out toys. He's 7 years old, but he's still very little-kid in his tastes (he's autistic, and we don't have TV, so all his choices are based on his own lil' head).

I really care about whatever the fuck it is I'm reading.

Like I said, we don't have TV, so I ask him, "Hey, let's get a movie!" I start pointing things out: Thomas the Train, Coraline, Dora, whatever else I know he likes. But no. His sights were absolutely, positively set on...

>ask
>exclamation point
Grammar.
You may be an atheist but meanwhile I pray at the shrine of APOSTROPHOS, GOD OF GRAMMAR! (creature of my own invention)

...Veggie Tales: Madam Blueberry.

I don't think I have to explain what VTs is.

What-- oh, that. Yeah that was popular at my middle school. I just looked at everyone like they had mental problems (and apparently they did) and moved on with my life.
I'm just fine now.

I happen to think it's harmless, even cute, but do I REALLY want it in my home?

Well a particularly astute observer might suggest you're being as unreasonable as Christfags are when they're confronted with reason and scientific progress but that's just me.
I mean, really, if you were so secure in your position you'd tell your kid "hey yeah let's check this bullshit out but prepare for disappointment." That's what I'd tell my kid, anyway. The Bible is a bunch of bullshit but some of the stories can still be fun for children so why not?

So my problem at hand was my young, autistic, insistent son wanted a Christian children's show to be put in his collection.

I mean you had a choice between fucking Veggie Tales and Transformers. I think you fucked up somewhere but the kid is autistic so what are you going to do?
Now they're whining about trolls--

"My heart just melted. At dinner, Cassidy told me about having religion class in church today and how they learned about the stations of the cross. She said it was "really neat to learn about how terribly Jesus suffered for us." She continued by saying how happy she was to be able to go to school with Jesus every day.... It just doesn't get any better than that. $2450 in tuition. Worth every penny."

Too many quote marks.
Well you dumb shit you take your kid to private school without investigating further and this is what happens.

my husband and i are expecting our 2nd child in may , and we just found out that it's a girl! hooray for team amazon!

Amazons cut off their right breast so they could pull a bowstring back better.
Just putting it out there for the next time someone has "Amazon pride".

what i want is to have all my kids have good, science-based names

... Uh-huh?

so the first child was a boy and we named him Bruce Faraday (Lastname).

>Bruce
>scientific
You're starting to lose me.

That was relatively easy because many high-impact scientists are male.

You know many high-impact scientists have names straight from the motherfuckin' Bible, and many of these names have the further benefit of not being douche names.
I guess my point is your kid is more likely to be a success by having a decent name than some bullshit made up fuckery. I'm not saying your method is less scientific (it is) but I do have the weight of statistics behind me on this one.

The best idea I have for this girl is Delta G. Lastname.

Know what I think of when I hear a girl named "Delta"? Porn star.
Delta your new name is Delia.

You know, for Gibbs free energy. While I haven't decided what G-name goes with that middle initial, I think it's a good start.

G-name. What's your great grandmother's name? That's her goddamn middle name, fuck me.

Delta is a good, old-school southern name that is uncommon, off the top 100 list, NON-RELIGIOUS, and largely free of connotation.

... No it isn't, shut the fuck up you Southern idiot.

However, my husband is NOT in love with this idea and thinks it sounds like a name for a character of a bad 80s space horror movie.

And yet my proposition of taking children from unfit parents and raising them in a monastery setting for the purposes of raising the future generation of soldiers was met with universal horror from everyone I told.
What, like Delta Tinkerbell is any safer on the hands of these assholes.

2) remind me of other cool, high-impact female scientists (i'm a biochemist/geneticist so i may not be familiar with the founders of your field)

Want a high-impact female scientist name, asshole?
MARIE CURIE YOU FUCK.
Jeeeeesus Christ.
Mary. What a perfectly normal name.

I took the kids to the zoo the other day, mostly to have something to do for a morning that wasn't hanging about the house.

To the lion cages~
Then we'll check out the birds of prey.

TEAGAN (my daughter, age 5): I want to know all about this snake.

Teagan. Your new name is...
Errr, T-names. Tina.
Tina is a fine name.

VOLUNTEER LADY: Well, ask me questions and I'll tell you about him.

TEAGAN: Why does he have those spots on his back?

Well little Tina the snake has spots on his back so he can blend into his environment better. Then he strikes before his prey even knows he's present. In this way the snake can down opponents several times his size and strength.
Let this be a lesson, Tina: a dagger in the dark is worth a thousand swords at dawn.

VL: Well, honey, about all I can tell you is it's the way God made him.

WE ALL MUST ADAPT TO OUR ENVIRONMENT, TINA. THE SUCCESSFUL PASS ON THEIR SUCCESS TO THE NEXT GENERATION AND THE WEAK BECOME MINUTIA.

TEAGAN: No. Oh, it's camouflage!

Camouflage is the color of fear. Remember that always, Tina.

See, what I objected to with the lady's comment was not them mention of God. Teagan doesn't have any real context for that word anyway, and if she'd asked I'd have explained it.

Well I guess I can see what you're trying for here but while you're raising your kid to be a butthurt faggot I'm turning her into a professional assassin.
I'm not saying my daughter is a lot cooler or anything but goddamn yours sucks.

Hello. I'm actually an agnostic (as is my fiancee), but am quite close to atheism. In other words, like Richard Dawkins, I admit I cannot prove God does not exist -- but I view his existence as no more or less likely than that of Zeus.

Making fun of Zeus, motherfucker?

I've noticed that really, REALLY religious Christian families tend to have really well behaved children, and that seems even more prominent if they have a greater number of children.

They're just well behaved because they fear rebuking, not because they're actually intrinsically motivated to do good.

Here's my question: Have you noticed that the more religious the parents are, the better behaved the kids are?

I'll tell you what I've noticed: parents that give a fuck about their kids tend to have better kids.

My 13 year old is studying the medieval world this year. This quarter they are starting units on the Muslim World.

"We have a lot to thank the Medieval Muslim World for. Without their dutiful preservation of even older Greek and Roman knowledge we would have been utterly without the Renaissance, not to mention their continued advancements on that knowledge."
Wow that was hard.

At the age of 16yrs old, my son was born and I chose not to baptize him. Everyday for the first year, my mother and Grandparents told me my baby would be going to Hell if I didn't baptize him.

EVERYONE KNOWS UNBAPTIZED BABIES GO TO LIMBO.
Assholes.

One little boy started verbally attacking my daughter over her support for Obama. He said Obama has a police record, wants to turn white people into slaves and doesn't believe in God. He then told my daughter that she's going to hell.

Blend in, Tina. Be like water flowing around a rock. While the rock cannot harm the water, over time the water erodes the rock.

The teacher got involved and demanded to know whether or not my daughter had said that. She said she hadn't. The boy insisted that she had. The teacher said to my daughter, "Do you believe in God or don't you?" My daughter admitted that she doesn't. I don't know what happened after that because at that point my daughter started crying.

The teacher has all the power in this situation. Bide your time until she doesn't, Tina. It may not seem fair now (because it isn't) but there will come a time when this lesson is useful for you.

I have two little girls who have never seen, smelt, felt, walked in, or jumped in autumn leaves.

Lucky them.

“Okay, fine. I…I kind of got into a God fight in the cafeteria yesterday.”

HEY, ARE YOU WINNIN'?
What the fuck is a "God fight"? Is that what you kids are calling the Crusades these days?
Oh forget it. No one knows how to raise children anymore, goddamn. That's a sad state of affairs when a 22 year old guy with no air conditioning has to tell you what's what.

MOTHERFUCKING FONT, MAN

So in the several millennia since the invention of writing mankind has made several important breakthroughs in the scripts themselves. The Chinese contributed block letters and block printing. A German gentleman contributed the printing press. Later some people invented the typewriter and later, with the advent of the computer came anti-aliased fonts and suchlike.
All of these things were originally intended to aid the reader in reading the text.
Anyway, back to something completely irrelevant: blogs.
My current resolution is 1920x1080. This blog, and indeed almost all blogs (except mine, go figure) take up less than a third of my screen.

"loneliness is the human condition. get used to it. no one will ever fill that space."

Except all those people who enjoy fruitful relationships with other people.

"copper doesn't know its copper until its turning into gold.
your loving doesn't know its majesty until it knows its helplessness."

Copper can't turn into gold because they are both elements.
Okay so there is a very complex and expensive process in which scientists can bombard elements with radiation to knock electrons off their shells but even then I'm almost certain copper cannot be turned into gold. I think lead can, though.
But still the cost far outweighs the worth of what's produced and it was really done as more a matter of interest and research than anything.

if only i had a purpose, one that doesn't involve seating charts or doctor's visits.

Go to the library. Read a book. Go for a walk. Play some vidya gayms. Learn to paint. Learn an instrument.
There are a number of things you could do to enrich your life. Take me, for instance. I say mean things to strangers on the internet. Incidentally: that Danika girl from a few blogs back keeps messaging me. Apparently the concept of someone commenting on her blog is so alien to her she must hunt me down and eat my brain to gain my power.
I must say, though, staying awake through her blog proved I have some sort of immunity to sleep magic. That would be a useful ability to have.
Give me all the healing items because I'm the only one that can use them through status conditions~

i must become my own purpose but i've instead become trapped inside my own thinking, my sadness, my solitude. i am becoming a ghost and no one notices and if they do i'd call them silly.

Speaking of, I remember in FFXI my character seemed utterly immune to any sort of intelligence down status effect. She'd evade area of effect abilities which I had thought was impossible.
No intelligence to drain, I guess do ho ho ho ho.

i am so angry at society right now. it serves as a sort of scapegoat. how dare it make me feel deformed for not actively seeking a relationship every moment of my waking life, for not constructing my life around it, for making me doubt my convictions.

Further proving the axiom "analysis is the bane of conviction."

job opportunities in the humanities are looking rather bleak these days.

They sure are. Meanwhile in teaching land, one of the fastest growing fields in the country, it feels good.

i also don't want to be so accountable for the failures i could incur.

La la I want to take credit for all my successes but pin the blame on someone else when I inevitably fail la la

desolation. does it relent?

There is no rest from the far-reaching destruction of the Emperor's Space Marines.

i am afraid of everything. i am sad constantly.

I just found this cool dog in my yard.
Then the owners showed up :(

i quit my job at chili's because i was tired of settling for mediocrity and they treated me like a servant.

Let's analyze the word "servant" shall we?
From the participle "servir" or "to serve" it is quite literally as it sounds: someone who serves.
Considering your job likely involved bringing people food (serving) I think it's a fair assumption that it was YOUR FUCKING JOB YOU TWAT.

i am trying to get a teaching job. pretty sure it would be, like, the most fun exciting thing ever.

In six months: "I quit my teaching job because they treated me like a teacher :("

i know most of you don't know me well, but do you think i would make a decent teacher?

NOOOO.
You're boring, you're way too self-absorbed, but most of all you're boring and pretentious.

in my philosophy of sex and love class i argued that masturbation is the ultimate successful sexual act, as well as the purest form of sexuality in existential terms.

Except from a biological standpoint.
Oh yeah, biology. That's kind of important. It's only how the species continues or something.
I don't know I'm not a philosopher.

really wish i had the graded copy of my superheroes and altruism paper.

Sounds really-- Zzzzzzzzzz.

paper is on:
altruism.
what is it (supposed to be)?

Fucking altruism is acting outside of one's personal interests purely for the benefit of other(s).

ever had a man confess to being in love with you?

Nope.
Anyway it's starting to feel like I just took 15 Ambien so I better be moving on.