Today's update is again typical whiny emo cunt whining about stuff and... Shit.
Click here or don't. I couldn't give three fucks about four fucks.
It's really not enjoyable to spend the last small hours of your actual birthday day crying. To wake up on my first day being 26 sad.
Oh boo hoo. You're 26. What's special about 26? Nothing. Go to work.
Most of you will have no idea what I'm talking about, so I'm sorry, but I needed to rant somewhere.
Nope, so I'm skipping this entire post. At least you put "emo" as one of your tags. Good you know it, at least.
Last night my awesome friends took me to pizza and a strip club. There were ugly strippers, really cute indie chicks, amusingly horrible dancers, beers, kisses and cuddles, and many jokes. And much much more, but I am too hungover to think right now.
Yeah you're the cool chick the guys can take to a strip club. I'm really impressed.
Post good hangover cures and birthday wishes at your leisure.
A raw egg yolk, hot sauce, Worcestershire sauce and salt I think it is. What's the matter, too pussy to take the manliest hangover cure ever?
Now there's a thread about gaming. She recommends a flash game. Thanks I'll be sure to look into it.
So I never really understood the concept of cybersex. Or phone sex for that matter. Either way it just seemed kind of pointless to me.
Apparently, though, Skype makes both of these concepts completely awesome. And that's all I'll say about that.
Don't post if you're going to make a point of being as cryptic as possible.
Please to enjoy some of my favorite songs as of late. Recommend some of your favorites!
Maia Hirasawa - Gothenburg. This lady is pretty and kind of reminds me of Regina Spektor.
Who? I have to listen to this.
Good Christ that's terrible. Develop some taste would you please? Also I'd recommend you some of my favorites but I'm sure you're diametrically opposed to good music so fuck off.
I just got dumped.
Good.
It's the nicest, kindest breakup I could ask for, but it's still a breakup and it still hurts so much I can't believe it. My whole body hurts.
Ugh. I'm waiting for the post where you describe in detail your periods. You seem like the type. I know it's coming.
I'd like to point out that this particular post has 36 comments.
THIRTY SIX. MY BLOG STRUGGLES TO GET TWO. THERE IS NO JUSTICE IN THE WORLD.
The Wii Fit is a jerk, and made me feel bad for not exercising on Thursday.
Play a real game.
So last night I was experiencing soreness all over and terrible joint pain in my hands. I went to bed in pain and figured I'd get it checked out at the doctor's next week. However, this morning I woke up completely covered in hives, or something like them. It looked like giant mosquitoes had bitten me all over, leaving behind blotchy, swollen and red spots everywhere that were itchy and painful.
Sounds like hives, looks like hives... IT MUST BE HIVES. Or Lupus.
He comes back and tells me the urine test says I'm pregnant.
Ho ho ho my mistake.
It turns out that the top three possibilities right now are Arthritis, Lyme disease, and Lupus.
I fucking called it. I hope it's Lupus, personally. A good autoimmune disease will set you straight.
After all my bad experience with religion, I've had a hard time believing in some being greater than ourselves out there watching over us. But I can't help but feel that someone send me that dream, or whatever it was, as a comfort.
Oh brother.
I read a short children's story once where Dog Heaven was a place where dogs could play and spend time with each other, and have everything they needed. They did this outside of a gate where humans lived with their pets, and waited patiently for the day that their particular human died and came to live with them.
Kind of morbid, don't you think? Dogs just sitting at a gate waiting for their former owners to die?
Next she posts a rather heartfelt (at least on the surface) post about how she misses her dead cat.
It's a sweet sentiment I suppose. The problem is she has said she misses whatever it is "so much it hurts" so many times it's basically rendered meaningless.
A cynic might say you fake your pain for attention, at least to a point.
Okay, people! I need some assistance. Tomorrow I'm getting my hair cut, and I want some help choosing which cut to get. I have two choices that I like, and both are ripped off from celebrities. Option 1 is ripped off of Victoria Beckham. Option 2 is ripped off of Charlize Theron (or however you spell her name) from Aeon Flux (terrible movie).
Ugh. I don't know... Victoria Beckham during the Spice Girls or modern one? Either way make your own goddamn decisions what am I your stylist?
This is Albus! I picked him out. He is one of the sweetest cats I've ever met. He's four months old, and the second you touch him, he starts purring. Right now he is sleeping behind me, with his little scholarly face and his adorable white belly showing.
Ho ho ho I know how this ends.
So last week I asked for today off so that I could go to several doctor's appointments. I made two in the morning, and when Angus got home we headed to the local women's clinic to get me some yummy birth control pills.
Gross. "Yummy birth control pills". For some reason that gave me serious douche shivers. I say "for some reason" because really anything could have prompted it about this fucking thing.
and three-quarter sleeve blazers (which are useless to me as I have to wear long sleeves to cover up my tattoos).
It is tough working in a professional environment where they might not view your tattoos with the same "I'm carefree and creative" attitude you do, huh? I'd say you should be more farsighted, but by now I've learned that's like stemming the tides.
I'm feeling a bit like a grumpy and/or boring old lady as of late. Here's the thing: I got a couple of good years in (depending on your definition of "good", I suppose) of all kinds of wild and crazy partying. I experimented with drugs, I got ridiculously wasted at parties, I got naked randomly...well, you get the idea.
Was that a hint of modesty at the end? I guess I've seen it all, now.
What I wouldn't give for a nice evening with several beers for all and some gaming or movie-watching.
Well you are dating a 19 year old. Someone seven years your junior. It makes sense that his goals would be radically different than your own.
I'd say "date someone your own age" but I'm positive people make the age gap work all the time.
So I don't know. I guess date someone more your speed?
What's this? A book collection?
Holy shit thank you internet.
Oh it's temporarily down-- too bad. I'll have to check back in a few minutes.
I hate Eli Roth (director of the "Hostel" movies) and all his friends who are sending the horror genre into a skydive of suck. I hate the "torture porn" genre. I hate these movies that replace any psychological depth, plot, subtlety, and hard work with the next most creative and gory way to murder, disfigure, or degrade someone.
You're looking for a decent plot from a horror movie?
One critic wrote that Hostel II and it's cohorts "desensitize us to our humanity", and I agree. I said on SG earlier that if Roth offered me a large sum of money to be in one of his sexist, gory, pointless films, I would pass.
Well you're even dumber than I gave you credit for, then. NO THANKS I DON'T WANT THAT HUGE CHECK, MR. ROTH. Why not? To save all that dignity? Fuck you can buy that back.
Also apparently this book thing is down so no making fun of her shitty taste anymore.
Oh well. I guess they took the site down so they wouldn't have to face my fists of fury.
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