A book? Posted on LiveJournal?

How preposterous!
This is Priscilla Shay's journal. It's always more personal for me when I know the person's name. You know, Priscilla, there's an adult bookstore near me called Priscilla's. Just thought I'd share, since you're a Priscilla in the book business as well.
So let's see how Priscilla twirls her pen (double entendre).
It starts, like all books do, with a dedication. Or, I guess, more properly, all books start with a title, but that's none of my business in this case.

I would like to dedicate this book to…

all my beloved Elements. I love you all and remember:

Void is nothing but everything all the same.
Air surrounds me.
Fire comforts me.
Metal keeps me strong.
Light leads my way.
Earth nurtures me.
Water sustains me.

I don't know what kind of fucked up alchemical theory she subscribes to, but I've never heard "light" mentioned as one of the elements. It's usually a cycle of four or five, usually water, fire, air and earth, occasionally void is thrown in there.

I would also like to thank Newman, Normango and Shakespeare.

(Welcome to the world of inside jokes. I am queen!)
Thank you to all you for being there for me and putting up with my insanity and uncertainty.

Love you all! Hope you like it…

I'd just dedicate a book to my mom and dad, but I'm not the great visionary you are, apparently.

I can already tell this book is going to be atrocious.

Prologue

March 10, 1814

What, opening with a letter? I'm going to have to check my calendar-- yes, it's 2008. You no longer have to pretend it's real life so the literary elite will be tricked into thinking it's not one of those new-fangled novellas. But whatever I'll roll with it.

British nobility, what a night to behold!

Considering it's 1814 I don't think you'd have to specify British nobility since it's probably implied that only a few people would be reading whatever it is you've posted, but all right.

According to Lady P, a certain Marquis left her quarters rather late in the night and heavily into his cups. But, apparently not too pissed to attend the annual King’s ball. Upon his arrival, the commotion began. What was a splendid night for dancing and charming became a ruckus. He arrived four hours late, and of course, not quietly.

I found the opening sentence ungainly. At first I was about to say "marquis aren't women" but then I realized "she" was the aforementioned "Lady P".

Bursting into the room, screaming at the top of his lungs, said Marquis made his way over to the guest of honor for the night. None other than Prinny. Prinny, a bit into his own cups, turned and welcomed the babbling Marquis. The second the honorable Marquis came in reach of the Prince Reagent, he shoved him to the ground. Treasonous, no? Grounds for hanging?

A marquis pushing a Reagent probably wouldn't be grounds for a hanging. I'm going to have to assume you knew this and the person writing this letter didn't. Seems odd someone with enough clout in the well-to-do circles to be printing such a piece of gossip wouldn't, but whatever.

Apparently not. As the Marquis tackled Prinny, a shot rang out. What may have sent England in search of a new leader turned out to be the embodiment of a national hero. Applause my lord, applause. (That is, if he remembers any of it in the morning.)

So this marquis pushes the prince (uhh, why?) but someone had the misfortune to attempt an assassination right then and missed because of it.
That's it. Well it's certainly not the worst thing I've ever read, but that's about all it has going for it. Utterly unimaginative. I can't tell the principle characters yet, but they seem cliched and hackneyed already. Already it's written in an assumed Victorian mode of speech with no real thought given to how Victorians actually wrote and spoke. I've read a number of Victorian stories, and none of them use the term "pissed". Doesn't mean they don't. It isn't my area of knowledge so for all I know outside what would admittedly be, at most, one hundred Victorian stories, they use it constantly.
So going earlier:

I'm going to post the prologue and Chapter One (open to everyone) on Friday night.

Guess chapter one is none of my business too.

Then I'll update every 5-7 days, posting it as private and only those on the selected buddy list will be able to view it. If there are late comers :) message me and I'll add you <3

Uhh... If I were a real dick, I'd make an account, get her to add me, then reproduce each chapter for a scathing review. I'll have to weigh the effort-potential pay off for this. Somehow I imagine this would be a bit only I'd be interested in.

I got to see one of my friends from high school who (who or whom??) I haven't seen in FOR-EV-ER!!!

If you're writing in the Victorian mode you're really going to have to get your basic grammar down. It's whom. Also it should be "hadn't seen in forever", not "haven't seen in forever". The sentence starts in the past tense and "haven't" is present tense, and your tense has to stay the same. Come on.
Now there's something written in font so small I can't even read it.

Yes, I transitioned here because i have more control over who reads what I write and who doesn't, but please bear with me as I add restrictions.

Huh. Not the mark of someone who is confident in their writing, I think. What happened is you posted this on, what was it-- fictionpress.com, but it was terrible and quite a few people told you so so now you're here where you can surround yourself with sycophants and people too stupid to know the difference.
Then she lists some rules to reading this story (yeah that's right, there are rules):

1) Please enjoy my stories.

2) Please do NOT steal my stories.

3) I appreciate constructive criticism and reviews.

4) If you have suggestions, please feel free to voice them.

5) I will be monitoring who reads my entries, so be aware I will be able to track you down.

6) Again...Enjoy :)

Rule 1 is completely unreasonable. How can I agree to something like that when I have no idea how I'll react? It might be the best thing I've ever read in which case no problem, but from what I have seen so far I doubt it.
Rule 2 is no problem. Most thieves only steal things of material or intrinsic value.
Rule 3 is a flat out fuck me lie. If you were looking for constructive criticism you wouldn't be blocking most of your potential readers.
Rule 4 is just stupid. You're writing a novel here. You should know where it's headed better than your readers. Unless you mean suggestions for wording in such, in which case this is rule 3 again.
Rule 5 is a threat. I'm not really sure what she's threatening, though. I guess if I spam her comments section she'll find me somehow (again, how?) and do something mean to me. But since she lists her location New York and I doubt she has the tools on LiveJournal (or the skill to use them if they are there) to figure out my location based on my IP address, I'll just have to take comfort in the fact I'm a considerable distance from her.
That's it. That's the entire blog. Apparently she just started.
So for the first time ever I'm asking for reader feedback. Do I pursue this invite route and make this a weekly bit? Or do I fuck the whole thing and go back to random acts of hostility towards people I don't know and will indeed never meet?
READ THIS: I had this entry in reserve for some reason. It's quite a few days old but I found it good enough to be released into the wild so enjoy your (slightly belated) entry.