MyFoxWGHP

I watch Fox News daily. Not because I agree with its nonpartisan views (har har) but mostly so I can make fun of every image that passes by my stupid face.
Tonight Leah Beano reminded me she, along with the other Fox 8 news cast, has a blog. Well that's a mighty coincidence-- I happen to have a blog myself. Where I critique other blogs.
We'll start with her blog, since it's only fair.
http://community.myfoxwghp.com/blogs/Leah_Beno
I feel worse about making fun of cute girls than of ugly girls because-- well life isn't fair that way, is it? But really I feel bad about neither, I just said that as a throw away bit. That's why I tell the jokes, people.
First post from July 14th (yeah I'm writing this in advance) 2008: To Drill or Not to Drill?
I make it a point to avoid writing about politics because I find it uncouth, but I do find the framing for this question unique. Very much like Othello's monologue, this question. And very much like Othello's monologue, I couldn't care less.
June 26, 2008.

Just like the weather..... wait a minute and the news will change.

Probably should have read something more like "just like the weather... I turn this shit off right after it."
So some people are getting laid off from their jobs because it's cheaper to take them to China and now people who have worked in the same place for 50 years have to find work elsewhere. These people obviously are having to make major life changes and Leah Beno finds time to insult these hard working people.

So what now? Brenda is looking for a job. So if you need good sewer, let me know.

Why would I need a good sewer? And are you offering yourself as a sewer? Or this Brenda? Either way: lady, whatever kinky shit you're into is your business. Leave me out of it.
Oh, oh, SEWer. Ah ha, ha, I get it. Perhaps "seamstress" may have been a more appropriate word choice.
Skipping to... Ah, May 15, 2008.
More importantly, the comments. I'd call this an embarrassment, but it is Fox News, and I would expect no less.

Good idea, Farmtruk! But, I agree with Sea, they aren't smart enough to pull off a plan like that! Plus, it would require having to do some REAL WORK!! LOL!!

Wow you are a wit! If someone named "Farmtruk" approached me with an idea, I'd have to say conversation over.
On to Buck Buckley's (that's his name. I'm serious.) Blog. Only one post. Something about English being the mandatory language of America. Hmm. Well, it is a great language.
I'm sensing a theme running through the whole of Fox 8's News Blogs: xenophobia. It can be a beneficial mindset, though, xenophobia. It keeps people afraid of new things, leading to-- oh that's right, the dark ages.
I think what everyone at Fox News needs to do, and what often fortifies me against such backwards and superstitious thoughts is this: remember what other countries produce in terms of women.
That's what I do. Just recently I became aware Argentina had a reasonably hot woman as a pop sensation: Chenoa. I wasn't even aware Argentina was a country before this. I thought it was a fruit. Now that I'm aware of her, I welcome Latin America into my heart.
And that's what I'd like to suggest to Fox News to be a better website: just post pictures of Chenoa. Why not?
Hell, why stop there? Post pictures of all the pop sensations from other nations no one was aware of. Koda Kumi, that Korean chick I saw in a magazine at the Korean grocery store... I'm sure if you devoted even a quarter of the resources you do to the latest breaking story "new speed bump in front of the mall?" your website would be my new homepage. Think of it as a philanthropic venture. You're spreading multinational awareness and suppressing the fears of the backward and stupid.
And that's my suggestion to everyone as well. More pictures. I'm not saying turn into a porn site, because God knows there's more of that than any human could consume in a lifetime, but something tasteful. Small in the corner, even, but noticeable enough so that when I get done with whatever nonsense your brain just vomited out I can look over and say "well that was a huge waste of time but she is fantastic."
Also welcome to my new updating strategy. Every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. That's how the pros do it.