A PATTERN EMERGES

My advanced statistical study of my own blog has determined most of you don't check update days but the day after.
I don't know why this is a stunning revelation considering how late I post these but whatever.
I found this blog on ONTD_Glee.
Because that's a thing.

I will never leave LJ.

Ever.

They can take away my layout. They can fuck around with the friends page. They can do away with paid accounts. Everyone can leave.

I WILL NOT LEAVE.

I will not move to Dreamwidth.

LJ has been my home for 11 years. I have been here through EVERY major LJ kerfluffle.

Can you fucking imagine being on Livejournal for 11 years and being proud of this fact?
That would be something I wouldn't tell under torture.

Planned Parenthood went well! I was briefly terrified in the waiting room. "What am I getting into, I'm a VIRGIN, I have no right to be here, this is all so overwhelming and terrifying HALP."

 Why are you posting about this?
This is officially more than I wanted to know. Your trip to Planned Parenthood and the lack of a pounding your tuna is getting.
I mean honest to fuck.

But at least being there made me feel like it was POSSIBLE. You know. Me having a relationship and sex and stuff. 

Nope.

Oh good. Now my period is here, and I'm so fucking sick. OH GOD was all of that PMS?! How the fuck do you induce your period. I really need to know. PMS is ruining my life I'm fucking serious. 

MORE THAN I NEED TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR VAGINA.

Alright tho. Re-bought Sims 3 (didn't have to, but didn't realize that until too late).

Runs on Octane like a dream, and memories came flooding back. I MISSED this game so much!! ;_; 

After 10 minutes of sitting here wondering what Octane was (I seem to recall there was a CD image mounter called Octane) I realized she's a twat and probably named her computer that.
And calls it that.
I hate it when people do that shit. I mean internally my computer is named Grimaldus but I don't call it that.
And Grimaldus is an awesome name. Naming your computer Octane is just overtly stupid.

So now the question is, why the hell will Sims 3 run beautifully, while Sims Social, a damn FACEBOOK game, lags like crazy and forces me to reload the page every 5 minutes?! 

>Facebook
>good coding
Pick zero and SUCK COCKS IN HELL.

MyBrowserCash turned out to be legit (and how!).

Now, CashGopher follows suit~! They paid me $12.92 yesterday!

Both are browser add-ons that make you look at scammy webpages for money, but both turn out to be quite profitable! 

Until the Ukranians steal all your money with the backdoor they installed--
but never mind.

CashGopher surprised me. The internet is full of emphatic rejections. "They never paid me, I only made 1 cent, they put trojans on my computer" and so forth. But apparently when you're like me, with 2 computers you leave on pretty much 24/7, you can rack up the change quite quickly. And not get a goddamn trojan.

Of course I doubt you could spot a Trojan when you got one.
The point is you kind of don't know because they're disguised as shit you let through.
Like the Trojan horse, you know?
Because Odysseus--
he made the Trojan horse as a gift for the Trojans but hid dudes in it that popped out and opened the gates, right
so you're not supposed to know when you get one.

So, in one of my live action improvised PR episodes when I was 13, Kimberly (yes, Kimberly Ann Hart) wanted to swear herself to celibacy because she was mad at Tommy and didn't want to be tempted to take him back.

You're almost named what my EVE Online character is named.
That's kinda spooky.
I don't know how you turned out to be such a twat, though.
Oh apparently that's not her name.
I have no idea what the fuck is happening
Who is Kimberly Ann Hart?

So I had her go to a priest, who had her swear on a bible that she would not attempt to engage anyone of the opposite sex in sexual intercourse, or engage in any sexual activity.

I remember going into my mom's room and grabbing an actual BIBLE (method acting) for this scene. And since I played all the characters, I put my hand on the bible and swore to this shit myself! (METHOD ACTING)


Of course, it only says "opposite sex". But even so. It's hilarious that that actually happened. That I, in character as (a blatantly ooc) Kim swore myself to celibacy on a real Bible. 

Really that's hilarious.
Meanwhile Anna Hart the EVE Online character forges an entire galactic weapons cartel. 
Not saying my story is better or I play better games than you
but you know.
I'm sure she'd swear on a Bible if she thought it'd get her somewhere, though.
That person in the last blog was gender fluid.
Anna Hart is ethics fluid.

IDK, Glee... you're not even worth vitriol. I'm so done.

I mean, I'm not, but goddammit, what the.

No, let's just. 

PICK A SENTENCE FRAGMENT AND STICK TO IT.

I acknowledge the kind of genius-y move of putting Karofsky's suicide attempt to Blaine's song, with Kurt present. Because Blaine also dealt with SERIOUS gay bashing and got the shit kicked out of him. So this was decent continuity.

Um. Karofsky's attempt. The whole thing was also surprisingly not-triggery, but SHOW YOU ARE NOT. NOT. NOT. NOT GOOD AT HANDLING DEPRESSION/SUICIDE SO STOP DOING THAT RIGHT NOW because just because I was not triggered, that doesn't mean others weren't GODDAMMIT TO FUCKING SHIT

TRIGGER WARNING CAN'T SEE ANYTHING SHOCKING
GLEE IS TOO HIGH OCTANE FOR ME
If you need a trigger warning for Glee you're in luck because there's a solution for that.
It's called GROW THE FUCK UP.

Yeah, so... I think I've finally figured out my "type". 

M8.

Single White Female seeks Evil Alien Robot. 

M8.

So... Steve Jobs, former CEO of Apple and tech god, passed away today, after stepping down barely a month ago. Shockingly sad news. I didn't even realize all the stuff he did until I read his Wikipedia page, but uh yeah. Pretty much went and changed EVERYTHING. Multiple times. He made technology amazing and exciting and revolutionary on an ongoing basis.

And he was only 56 years old! 

Didn't do shit.
Good businessman, though.
Anyway sorry to make this short but I just spent about 20 minutes with the worst dry eye ever and was basically just trying to read between having to slam my eyes shut.
That was very peculiar.
Anyway zzzzzzz