I sure am glad I'm 14 or older, otherwise I couldn't read EVILSHELLY'S RAMBLINGS!
What a loss to, well, me if I couldn't read these great ramblings.
Here's today's ('s's's's) writer's block:
Do you consider yourself patriotic? If so, how do you express it?
No one is more patriotic than me circa WW2 and into the 70s and 80s but after that I suddenly have a lot of trouble justifying this country's shenanigans.
HAVE ANY OF YOU LESSER COUNTRIES BEEN TO THE MOON?
I THOUGHT NOT.
I'm part native american, part black, part white; 100% female.
Sooooooo-- I can expect a lot of whining?
HOOOOOOO.
High five, me.
I just found out Osama's code name was GERONIMO.
So, no; I'm not patriotic. Not even a little.
Sympathy for the enemy?
Let me consult my handy guide here-- yeah that's treason.
PREPARE TO BE FLOGGED THEN HANGED.
Now there's a post entitled "7 outta 11" and I'm about five lines into this and I have no clue what the fuck is happening (par for the course on Edie Finds a Corpse, really)
and it's 3 stars out of 5.
or, EH, I'VE HAD BETTA...
and by that I mean, The Girl and I have been looking for a Chinese Food Take Out to replace our favorite place. DIM SUM. And this place doesn't really do it.
Excuse me?
I hate how bloggers always give people in their lives code names like I've been following long enough for me to know who "The Girl" is or like I even give half a fuck.
We've had a place for the last 10 years that is--words are not truly adequate enough to describe the deliciousness of the food that the The Old People cook for us. But they were old 10 years ago. Now they are FUCKING OLD, and are hardly ever open any longer...and the last 3 times we've been? Their boys have been cooking, and? YUCK! No, son, no. You do not cook like your dad, and he should be ashamed to call you son, and your wives are even worse.
Time to level culinarian, ladies.
CLN is actually a pretty fun job when you get into it-- I just can't seem to get high enough on it. Rank 18, still blowing shit up more often than not.
Time to balance that, SE.
I don't even understand how fish + fire = mercury and sand or why that's cooking and not alchemy but whatever.
So, The Girl and I have undertaken a mission: Check out every Chinese Food Restaurant within a 5 mile radius and FIND A NEW PLACE.
The problem? The Old People make a Pot Sticker like no other people on earth! (Or within a *15* MILE radius of our home address) Also? They know and love us. They shove a good 50 dollars worth of food into every 20 dollar container of food we buy.
That's hard to match, let alone top.
Also? They know that GINGER makes a chicken/pork pot sticker fucking POP. Fucking Delicious.
It sounds like you know a lot about this. Maybe it's time to make your own?
I mean if you'd asked me specifically what Dim Sum is I'd say "it's that shit in Dynasty Warriors that increases your health by 10" because I have no idea. I suspect there's pork in it.
I sorta clicked on this awful Star Trek fic. It's a gender-switch.
>clicking fanfic
>expecting the word "good" to be part the equation
Your fault.
Well, I guess "good" can be part of it if it heads off the phrase "good God" but otherwise, no.
Just really bad. Over emotional, over the top angst and it seems to have been written by a barely literate child with no understanding of punctuation, let alone emotions and real life situations.
This differs from other fanfiction how?
so, yes, I don't really care for Facebook. I have a Facebook account because I used to use it to silently stalk my girl-child.
Oh. So daughter.
THE GIRL IS YOUR DAUGHTER.
JUST SAY THAT.
JUST SAY IT.
but every once in a while I'll log on and take a look at the 250 or so messages I have piled up. and delete them.
but right now? I'm buzzed and bored, so I read a few 'friend requests'. one being: ARE YOU THE MICHELLE LORRAINE THAT WRITES MARY STEWART FAN FICTION? FOR THE MERLIN SERIES?
You write fanfiction and you have a daughter.
That's literally the first thing I do when I Google a girl I know. "does she write fanfiction?" if so, we can no longer know each other.
Ugh.
I remember when I had to read Huckleberry Finn for a Junior High School English class; with a teacher that made his students read out loud. I was 1 of 4 black kids in a class of 28 and I *dreaded* it.
The book Night says "bitch" a ton so I just had all my kids say it like 10 times in a row and get their giggles out before we started.
Worked well.
But when some kid-and I'll be honest here, a kid I did not like to begin with, a kid I knew to be racist-decided to substitute "black person" for "nigger" during his "read", I was incensed. I was enraged. I wanted to punch the kid in the face.
See? The thing is: NIGGER is not a synonym! You don't get to say "black person" and mean NIGGER. And this kid, and the rest of my class, absolutely did. not. get. it. It's been over 20 years, and I'm still angry about it.
See this is why people on the internet use it to be ironic. It's really easy to get a rise out of people with it.
Far be it from me to deny people easy trolling but I consider it kind of a cop out troll. Just say NIGGER and suddenly everyone is butthurt.
Nigger is a racial slur. Plain and simple. A slur. That's what Twain meant it to be and that's what it is.
And a funny word.
And some yahoo responds with this:
We had to read some short stories in college that referenced the word, and the teacher didn't realize the word was in the assigned story and he spent the rest of the class, and the beginning of the next several classes apologizing. And this was college! I can't believe that'd be on the course curriculum in middle school.
I had a class where the word "nigger" came up in the reading and then the professor came in the next day without realizing it and here was her quote when some kids were butthurt:
"fucking deal with it."
I never had a problem with that professor again, despite it being AMERICAN ROMANTICISM.
i didn't, not really, give thanks, that is.
despite my native grandmother's wish i ignore my native heritage, i've always been native enough not to care for the holiday.
So speaking of college I had to take this bullshit Native American literature class and one (probably the only) thing I read that stuck with me said that no one who is "part Native American" claims a man is their Native American relative.
I dunno I thought that was kind of interesting and further proves people are full of shit so I take and use it when possible (which is never, fuck that class).
LAST NIGHT:
the girl: a fucking *research* paper for literature? what the fuck is the point of me writing a bunch of shit that regurgitates other people's opinions of Beowulf and The Green Knight, with plenty of fucking footnotes? Huh? WHY CAN'T IT JUST BE MY OPINION?! IT'S FUCKING LITERATURE!
Because *you* are an illiterate fuckstick who doesn't know The Green Knight from her asshole.
the girl: (glares)i want to do *anything* but write this paper. clean. kill spiders. clean the oven! mow the lawn! (she has crazy allergies. mowing the lawn would put her in a coma!) look up other peoples thoughts so i can fucking tag them as footnotes? NO! (looks at me, sad and distressed) write this for me.
IF YOU SPENT HALF AS MUCH TIME BITCHING AS YOU DID WRITING YOU'D BE DONE.
ack!
i woke from the most horrifying and spider filled nightmare freaking terrified!
Speaking of spider-filled nightmares: remember that level in Demon's Souls where it starts out as a normal haunted mine filled with creepy undead dwarfs (I can't believe I just qualified that with "normal") and then as you get deeper in there are SPIDERS EVERYWHERE and the boss is a gigantic armored spider?
Fuck yeah that game was awesome.
Too bad you could camp behind a post and take pot shots until victory.
Anyway I have shit to do suddenly: I have leather strap orders to fill and shards to acquire and money to make and ranks to gain so be seeing you.
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