BOREDOM

I found this person through, what was it, Dark Stitch, the Gothic sewing circle. At first I was really excited, though. Shit, people stitching the way WOMEN DID IN THE THIRTEENTH CENTURY. Back when people knew how to make a fucking building.
But no, it's like Hot Topic shit. Oh well.

So, the day that I officially moved into my new house, i planted a variety of... well, plants.

WOOOOW.

The reason that I hate to garden is that you have to do it.... outside- with the bugs and dirt and filth. I'm just not really the kind of person who goes outside- if you can't tell from the lovely tan that I'm rocking- I don't like most of the things that are not inside a hermetically sealed lab.

Two of the most meandering sentences I've ever read, Jesus Christ.

When you're gardening indoors, it's freaky how similar to Harvest Moon the process actually is.

Oh yeah, there's a lot of pressing B to be done when gardening inside. Also romancing the florist girl.

The flower is the HM equivalent of a turnip-

Grows fast, sells for nothing and you wonder why you bothered?

they sprout in a very short time, presumably just to show you that the process works.

Ah.

It's strange how I used to think of evolution, really. I knew that plants were constantly living, breathing (thanks for the O2, btw) and evolving along with the rest of us, but, I suppose as an ethnocentric animal, when I think of evolution, i tend to think of myself and my fellow critters evolving, struggling, living against a blank green background.

Evolution doesn't really work like Pokemon. You can't actually observe things evolving. It's kind of a slow process over millions and millions of years and things don't really get "better" they just adapt to their environment. If the environment doesn't change then neither does the animal.

Oh man, I am so upset. So, let's not shy away from it- I'm an American, a US American for those of you aggravating people who don't understand our ethnocentrism and think that the rest of the continent(s) count(s).

No, really?

We're a Capitalist society, which, for the most part has worked out pretty well (if you ignore all of history, as we do) but lately, I'm feeling a crunch.

Speak for yourself, cunt. No one observes history as keenly as I do.

Now that I've bitched about everything going on in my life, not being able to pay my bills, my house falling apart, my car falling apart, ect. Lets take a moment to explain why that makes me a bitch. I am broke as hell and bitching because the government doesn't give a damn.

So get a job?

You know who barely has a government? Haitians.

WHAT THE FUCK DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?
Also: yeah, look where that got the Haitians.

I know that we were fucked pretty hard core when the hurricane hit here, I mean, the road signs were gone, the water line was up, and a lot of people dies from exposure or starvation. I wasn't one of them. I have running water; full of coal slurry, but running none-the-less to be boiled and used.

So--
wait I'm a little lost. Are you angry at the government or not?

These folk are royally fucked- I mean, there were a lot of ares without basic necessities anyway; from what the TV tells me, and now they got nothing. That kind of pisses me off, because, and my geography is poor, I thought that Hatti was off the coast of NY/Florida side of the states.

They're "off the coast of Florida" in the same sense Australia is "off the coast of Japan". Neighbors, technically, but distant ones.

Like, right off the coast, Caribbean close. To the point where a lot of folk can live in the States and still have realitives that have lost everything.

But there are a lot of people in the US. Remember a few years ago when Russia invaded Georgia (you don't but pretend for a minute). I'm sure there were "US Americans" as you put it who had family affected by that, and yet I don't hear you bitching about-- whatever your butthurt is (I can't really tell to be honest).

That... kind of makes us assholes, guys.

Billions and billions of dollars in aid pledged to Haiti straight from the US and we're assholes?
How, exactly?

So remember, no matter how bad your life is, if Mother Nature hasn't taken revenge on you yet; you're doing better then a lot of folk.

I hope Zeus sticks a pronged lightning bolt straight up your ass for how fucking stupid you are about semicolons.

Alright, now that I'm out of soap and my box has collapsed, let's talk Zombies.

I still don't understand why you're butthurt. You're angry at the government for not helping you but then you're not because the US provides you with things like running water and paved roads and then you are because the US "didn't do anything" to help Haiti even though they did and-- oh this is doing my head in.

I mentioned in my last blog that I had RE5 sitting on my shelf and hadn't opened it yet. Well, now it's opened and I must say, possibly the best RE yet.

>5
>best Resident Evil
girlsplayingvideogames.jpg

I've got to say that prior to RE4 I wasn't a huge fan. I liked the storyline, but I'm just not a survival horror kind of gamer- I HATE fixed camera angles and pre-rendered backgrounds you LAZY ASS PROGRAMMERS.

It was the PS1. You don't remember video games from then because you just got into this when the Wii came out I'm sure but trust me computing wasn't at a stage where it could support advanced graphics. That's okay because we didn't know any better. Mario 64 was in REAL 3D and that was it, graphics were never getting any better than that.

It is not mood-setting, it is not frightening, it is not suspenseful, it is ANNOYING! When I am trying to shoot something in the head, I step backwards, and the screen changes, that is just BAD PROGRAMMING that certainly could have been eliminated in the PS2 era, but it took you until RE4 to get it?

Maybe you've never seen a movie before. Let me explain how cinematics work: camera angles enhance mood. In a video game where you have full command over the camera to see all the shit that's about to leap out at you it becomes less scary, doesn't it? It becomes less about "survival" (important word in the genre Resident Evil is part of, SURVIVAL horror) and more about "search and destroy". Just because you're too stupid to accommodate changing controls (read: it's not that hard) doesn't make them bad games.
No, what makes any RE after 2 but before 4 (this is somehow more than just 3) bad is because they aren't very interesting.

I'm sexist, so I like that there's a girl.

Yeah man, that's what Resident Evil was missing.
Claire Redfield? Who's that, again? Jill Valentine?
LISTEN, THERE'S A GIRL NOW.

OK, so finals are over! Woot! As a reward, I have come into a rather large collection of Wii games, and I've started to break them in.

GAYMAN WITH THE WII
Let's see, what are some good Wii games? Monster Hunter Tri immediately comes to mind.

First up, some downloaded stuff that I have been wanting to play since I was like 12. I finally went through and beat Paper Mario, what I assumed, and have never been corrected, was a sequel to Mario RPG.

I think I had something to say here but I don't remember what it was.

It was pretty strait-up Mario RPG, which was cool- I actually liked that game, the way that the battles were kinda turn based, except you could defend or avoid attacks without wasting turns, with button combos

"Kinda" turn based in that they were turn based 100%.

I always hated that I could be a level 99 fighter or something, and then get hurt by a cactar. Once you get high enough, no goomba can touch you. Fun, not really that challenging RPG.

Err, explain that? I mean I could be the best boxer in the entire world and if 20 weaklings gang up on me I'm getting pummeled.

Which is quite the opposite of the New Super Mario Brothers for Wii.

No, okay. Something I should be used to by now. Stupid thoughts given absolutely no qualification.

We Sonic kids don't do to good on survival horrors; see, we lived through an era that taught us to live without fear in video games, so the things that are supposed to scare me, like cinematic fixed camera angles, kinda just piss me off.

I can't believe I'm getting a lecture about video games from you.

Call of Duty, Modern Warfare, I have but a single question for you.

I mean Jesus Christ, you bought Modern Warfare for the Wii, what can you possibly know about anything?

Why is it so hard to split the screen in half? What is up with all these new games having on-line only co-op?

It's 2010 and most people have the internet? Infinity Ward only wants your money and doesn't actually care about you? I don't know. Research things before buying them.

But I actually considered myself realitivly good at anything Eidos had ever produced. I've been obsessed with Tomb Raider since it came out; remember? There was an entire generation of us... Lara was the first real game heroine that wasn't wearing full body armor.

Remember back when people had no sense? Wait, no, they still don't.

Couldn't the controls have been better here?

You're asking if the controls on a Tomb Raider game can be better. Pop quiz: when have the controls on a Tomb Raider game ever been good?
Jesus Christ all mighty. Not a single mention of Monster Hunter but then again her primary complaint is NO LOCK ON so I'm guessing she'd be bitching about how Monster Hunter isn't holding her hand through a 40 hour tutorial.
IT'S YOU AND A GIANT DINOSAUR. GET YOUR KNIFE AND START ROLLING OUT OF THE WAY, THIS ISN'T COMPLICATED.
Also for someone supposedly "so poor and down on her luck" you certainly have more Wii games than I do. Just putting it out there.