Let's-- excuse me?

So I finally got around to getting and playing that Dawn of War II expansion, Chaos Rising. I'm really confused at some of the moral choices I have to make. At one point in the third mission you can bust down a gate or jump over it and lower it. The logic being CHAOS SCUM would destroy the gate while a good loyalist would jump the gate and bring it down safely so it can provide security for THE SERVANTS OF THE EMPEROR in the future.
Well I don't have any jump troops so I had to bust it down and the game calls me corrupt for doing so.
WELL EXCUUUUUUSE ME FOR NOT LETTING THE IMPERIAL GUARD GET HAPLESSLY SLAUGHTERED WHILE I STAND THERE LIKE A LUMMOX. Then I got an additional point of corruption for picking up a meltagun that apparently is corrupting somehow. I guess the logic is anything Chaos uses would be corrupt but the heavy bolter I recovered from a Havoc has purity points so-- God, no, no, let's not get into this.
Anyway here's some blog I have no clue what's going on.

I am St. Gabriel Gaḇrîʼēl the Archangel, Strength of God, Divine Messenger, One of the Seven who Stand before the Lord, Chief of the Angelic Guards of Paradise, Bringer of the Word of Truth, Angel of the Power of God, Angel of Birth and Mercy, Angel of Death over Kings, Prince of Ice and Thunder, and Maker of Changes.

>Maker of Changes
CHAOS.
Also: I'm about to view content not appropriate for minors.

OOC: Some RL things have become a little complicated. I'm working on it, but I'm not in the best of states and may not be able to reply to threads at my usual pace. I will definitely try my best, though. I'm sorry. <3

OOC for those of you blessedly ignorant of all things douchey on the internet stands for "out of character".
(+1 corruption point for you now. Even knowledge of Chaos corrupts.)
Ready for some Christian fanfiction?
I never thought I'd say those two words together but here we are.

The end happens in winter. It is strangely fitting, after all; winter is death, but this time there are no hidden seeds of new life that will bloom in time.

DEEEEEEEEEEEEP.

Gabriel had once complained about Christmas; it was supposed to be a holy day, a celebration of the birth of the Saviour, and now it was a celebration of mass consumerism and greed and gluttony and it wasn’t even the right day.

Wasn't Gabriel the affable angel, according to Milton?
I'm pretty sure he's the one that tells Adam that there's a bad man amidst the Garden of Eden so BE ON ALERT and Adam like any good child promptly forgets and does the exact opposite of what he's told. I somehow doubt he'd be standing here all emo and shit.

He had been wrong; humans weren’t entirely stupid. They’d recognised the signs and the catastrophes, the mass miracles and massacres. They’d recognised that they were caught in the middle of a war. Churches had never been fuller, and on Christmas Eve, Gabriel stood unseen in a church for a while and watched as everyone prayed for mercy, for forgiveness, for salvation.

I'm praying for it to never stop snowing. From now until April I want the Northern Hemisphere to be blanketed with ice and snow.
For one thousand and one years we will be bathed in the storms of the Warp.

He had always assumed that Heaven would win. He holds on to that belief now, as casualties mount on both sides. Faith was hard to come by these days, after all; you treasured what little you had.

SEMICOLONS. SEMICOLONS AS FAR AS THE EYE CAN PERCEIVE.
This is literally the most cliched thing I've read in about 20 days.

With the freak snowstorms and floods and hurricanes battering most of the globe, and with the fallout from all the skirmishes, the human population has dramatically lessened.

Goddamn you even make the acid trip that is the Book of Revelation boring. Isn't this about the point where 1/3rd of the waters are turning to blood and there are poxes and rashes and shit?

[00:52] SavioBriion: :O
[00:52] SavioBriion: :O :O :O :O :O
[00:52] Bird: <3
[00:52] SavioBriion: it is an accurate depiction of my face right now
[00:52] Bird: <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
[00:52] SavioBriion: *GLOMP*

Oh God no.

... I can deal with the portrayal of myself as blonde and carrying what appears to be a duckling. I can even overlook the star tiara. However, there is a common misconception about me that I would like to clear up.

I am not "the only female archangel". There are quite a few angels who have chosen to assume female form, and I am not one of them. I'm genderless, and usually appear to be male; while I have the ability to assume a female form, I have done so about twice or thrice, for very brief occasions, during my millennia on Earth. However, for all intents and purposes, I am currently male.

I've seen some shit in my time but this is definitely up there. I seem to recall a second blog many, many years ago I reviewed where someone was writing fanfiction about archangels and I called her a cunt and we had a bit of a laugh and all that. This entry, however, is just about one thing: PAIN.

Your LiveJournal account for user "cattygabriel" has been credited with the
following add-on:

- Extra Userpics (1 package) - 2 months

...

Userpics: You've uploaded 32 of 102 total

So let me see if I understand this correctly: you have to pay Livejournal to upload avatars?
And people take advantage of this service?

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

... EEEEEEEEE...

*FLYINGTACKLEGLOMP*

Oh God.
... Literally, "oh God."

Uri-mun, you are wonderful and I'm sorry I took a while to post this, but this is just a reminder that you have my undying gratitude and I am your willing slave. >:3

Well this took a turn for the kinky.
CORRUPTION.
CORRUPTION ABOUND.

What is your fondest childhood memory of your father or grandfather?

Please be a normal answer.

When I was first brought into being, before Time was a concept, even before the Silver City existed, I could feel my Father. I could sense His Presence as a flame within me, and the sensation of being safe, warm and loved.

Welp.

This is Gabriel as a female. Warning: one of the pictures shows her in... lingerie. Hence the cut.

I'd be embarrassed to come up with 1. a fanfiction based on Christian mythology and 2. put gender-bending archangels in it.

Gabriel had neglected his duties for far too long. His assistants took care of his paperwork when he was away, of course, but he often felt guilty about it on his return.

Paperwork--
This is a severely fucked up cosmology.

Today:
[12:30] SavioBriion: YUBI SHINES
[12:30] Star Spiritgate: Yeeees?
[12:30] SavioBriion: WHY THE ANONYMITY?
[12:30] SavioBriion: *FLYINGTACKLEGLOMP* *LICKLICKLICK*
[12:30] SavioBriion: <3 <3 <3
[12:31] SavioBriion: THANK YOU SO MUCH!
[12:31] Star Spiritgate: XD;;;;; You're welcome
[12:31] SavioBriion: *glompsnuggle* Anything you want? Fic? "Art"?
[12:32] SavioBriion: Favours that shall not be spoken of in public? >:3

Holy shit.
Hold on I think the greatest douche shiver of all might turn into a full-on seizure.
This is so bad I'm having a douche seizure.

Has someone you loved and respected ever done something you consider despicable? If so, how did you deal with it? Did you try to forgive them? Did it permanently change your feelings for them?

I don't even remember these writer's blocks.

I loved Lucifer very much, once; he was my closest friend, and I also respected him as His Second and the leader of the Host. He was the bright Morningstar; his name, Lucifer, meant Light-Bringer, and he was truly the highest, most glorious angel in Heaven.

And then he defied our Father,

Nowhere in the Bible does it say Lucifer is Satan. That is a much later invention.

and Fell, and took a third of the Host with him.

The "one third of the Angelic Host" thing was an invention of Milton too, incidentally.

Speaking of Gifts, THANK YOU so much for the Lemur! He will keep Fella very good company <3>
People actually buy that clipart for other people?
Man, fuck.
All these businesses that work so hard on advertising and marketing and shit don't need to be working that hard.

It is warm and humid, and the heat is not helped by the huge bonfire burning in the middle of the town. A scrap of mulberry-bark paper escapes the fires, flying up towards the pale young man in priest’s robes standing nearby. The Archangel Gabriel catches it and stares at the half-hieroglyph still visible and wonders: how much knowledge, how much Mayan culture has already been burnt?

Not that I'm making excuses for the Conquistadors but they did preserve a lot of the Mayan culture in their own writings because Mayan writing may not have been a full writing system.
Wow what ensues is the biggest strawman argument ever.
This is terrible, goddamn. You'd think after this long at writing you'd at least improve a little bit.

Disclaimer: Gabriel and Lucifer are characters from the Bible I like to write about.

Oh is that right?

Warning: Hints of homosexuality, though technically angels are sexless.

I should link this to a conservative Christfag website, sit back and watch the flames.

Contrary to popular belief, the desert was not always a land of blistering heat and scorching sands. In fact, it was rather cool during the dawn and dusk, and at night.

>rather cool
>subzero
Yeah I guess.

It was not dusk yet, however, and Gabriel squinted against the sun, more for the benefit of the girl at his side than because it hurt his eyes.

“This is reckless and dangerous, Sultana,” he murmured.

As opposed to reckless and perfectly safe, or dangerous but careful.

“You help me escape my other minders, and then warn me? You are a conflicted man, Jibril.” Sultana’s tone was light, teasing, as she brushed off some sand clinging to the silver embroidery on Gabriel’s blue robes. Then she reached up to her veil. Gabriel caught her hand.

Gabriel, playa. Getting the DBGs.

“Not only are you alone with a man, you are removing your veil? Do you want to be stoned?”

Yes because all Muslims historically stoned women.
Christ all mighty.

Sultana pulled away, tugging off the veil and headscarf, tossing her long thick hair defiantly, and her dark eyes flashed. “Being stoned would be worth this one moment of freedom.

Very American view on life.
And what follows is WORDS WORDS WORDS.
Well I think that's it because I'm not seriously reading fanfiction and that's all that follows.
Also: PRAISE BE TO THE EMPEROR, SNOW IS UPON US.