Cancel whatever you were doing before.
Oh yeah, something not Assassin's Creed II.
Today at work, an e-mail was sent out to the entire office that basically said "Good news! We're going to open up a new full-time Records Assistant position to replace the two part-time hourly Records Assistant positions! The two hourly positions will be eliminated in December!" Guess who's one of the hourly Records Assistants.
At first glance, one might think "Oh good, they made your position full-time!"
No, they're hiring a full-time worker to replace you, idiot. I guess you could apply and they may rehire you, but upon further thought that's highly unlikely, because I'm sure you were inept.
Actually-- upon reconsideration, they probably would hire you if you were inept. That seems to be about the only kind of person that can thrive in a college middle management setting.
but that's not exactly what that means. What it does mean is that I'm essentially out of a job in December. I can certainly apply for the full-time position, but there's no guarantee that I'll get it.
Yeah I'm a pro at reading comprehension, basically. It was so difficult you'd need a pro to interpret "YOUR POSITION IS ELIMINATED" wouldn't you? Goddamn, they try to make that language as idiot-proof as possible and yet some chucklefuck still managed to interpret it wrong.
Funny thing is, when the Registrar hired me, they told me it was a permanent hourly position. Lying bastards.
Well it was at the time, probably. That was then, this is now, etc etc.
Now there's a long post about a Transformer comic and even I'm amazed at how little I care. Really, Transformer comics? In 2009?
Brotip: as long as Ultra Magnus is still around, who gives a fuck?
Now here's a picture of her and friend in costume (both fat, unsurprisingly) and they're dressed as Transformers (ostensibly, I don't really see it) and she's bitching that no one knew what specific Transformer they were supposed to be.
Back in the day there was not a more hardcore Transformers fan than me (then I turned five, but whatever) and even I doubt I could have named what specific Transformer you were supposed to be. Outside of Optimus Prime, Starscream and that faggot Bumblebee, etc who really knows the Transformers by name? Really, the unique Transformers stuck out, but no one could keep generic sports car X straight. I mean everyone knew Soundwave too, but who the fuck knew a tape deck could kick so much ass? See, that's what people remember.
Yeah that's right, kids. Back in the day we used to listen to music recorded on large strips of magnetic tape trapped in plastic squares. Ask your grandmother.
I now adopt the potato as my favorite token of affection.
:|
You'll also have to forgive my lack of reaction images. My computer is currently not feeling well (hard drive problem, don't really feel like dicking through recovery at the moment).
Okay let me just say that if you are ever going to be cutting up jalapenos or any other hot peppers WEAR GLOVES!! WEARGLOVESWEARGLOVESWEARGLOVES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WEAR GLOVES!!!! It hurts ithurtsithurtsithurts omfgitwon'tstopBURNING!!
Christ all mighty, shut up.
I've been bringing ELI (my mp3 player) to work with me, so I can listen to a little music while I'm pouring over mountains of paperwork.
Ah yes, one of those people that names their inanimate objects and actually calls it by its name.
Actually I do call my (currently broken) PC by the name I gave it when I first booted up Windows: Mr. Gay. Feels appropriate.
So, my 15-year-old little sister saw Inglourious Basterds with her 18-year-old boyfriend
I-- think that's illegal. Not seeing the movie, I mean. Banging a 15 year old as an 18 year old.
Also that is how the title of that movie is spelled, so no points off for spelling.
Although I am giving Quentin Tarantino a warning. I thought you were a member of MENSA, bro.
SOMEONE STOLE MY CAR!! ... Okay, not really. I just had a dream that someone stole him.
W-- oh. Also:
>him
>inanimate object
I'm still incredibly uncomfortable approaching or talking to strangers, but I've gotten to the point where I can manage pretty well if someone approaches me and starts a conversation.
Yeah you'll get nowhere waiting for them to approach you. Really, though, you aren't missing much. Trust me. Just a ton of butthurt, nonsensical drama and toolbags.
she told me I should work on some of my little projects (painting my action figures
>painting figures
SHOW ME YOUR MOVES. Well I found her Deviantart but I can't really tell if she painted these or not. The picture quality is pretty terrible but I'm going to just assume YOUR KUNG FU IS WEAK.
It's the dealing-with-the-customers bit. I'm too shy. It's not like I'm rude to them, I just get nervous around strangers and stuff, and I'm quiet and withdrawn when they really want me to be super chatty and outgoing.
>It's the dealing-with-the-customers bit. I'm too shy.
>Too shy
TOO SHY, HUSH HUSH, EYE TO EYE~
So that's it, ultimately. I have been praised repeatedly for my efficiency, diligence, accuracy, punctuality, work ethic, determination, etc. but I'm lost my job because I'm too shy and quiet. What ever.
Try a little harder~
Something's wrong, you're not naive, you must be stronger
Ohhhh baby try
Hey girl, move a little closer
'cause you're
too shy, too shy, hush hush
eye to eye
too shy, too shy, hush hush
eye to eye
Whoa sorry. She's going on about being fired and I got teleported to the 80s for about a minute.
And as long as Layla lived there with them, they would continue to collect the social security checks that Layla has been receiving since her father's death.
What'll you do when you get lonely
And nobody's waiting by your side?
You've been running and hiding much too long.
You know it's just your foolish pride.
Already I didn't like the idea living with these two people who are complete strangers to me, and the more I have thought about that situation, I become simultaneously more angry with them, and more heartbroken for Layla.
Layla, you've got me on my knees.
Layla, I'm begging, darling please.
Layla, darling won't you ease my worried mind.
Whoa sorry she's going on about some tragedy and I got teleported to the 70s for about a minute. How old am I, again?
Better be careful next line will have me teleporting back to Renaissance-era Italy for some ASSASSIN'S CREED II ACTION WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Yeah fuck this noise. Phantasy Star 0 just came out and I'm reliving the glory days of console gaming.
Yeah, back in the day not everything was brown and bloom and not every hero was some generic bald space marine fellow.
Also first person shooters were newfangled and untested because indeed 3D was a gimmick and not really 3D but some sort of crazy smoke and mirrors trick the nerd programmer equivalent to MacGyver invented.
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