Lawsy boss

We're in for it now.
Let me tell you guys about that fucking patch first though, okay.
It's pretty good.
I dunno, patch 1.19 was better I think but this isn't too bad. I like the achievements a lot but I still need to gain 1.5 levels for my fancy crown. Haven't tried the Moogle fight and I probably won't until someone else figures out how to do it because frankly fuck figuring it out with spergs.

If you could solve one problem in the world, what would it be?

I'd make pugilist a good job for the first time in FFXIV history.
In fact, no, let's aim big: I'd make unarmed fighting a consistently viable option in all video games.
Where's my unarmed skill in Skyrim, Bethesda? That shitty "your gauntlets' armor rating is additional damage too" trait sure isn't fucking cutting it.
I'm not asking for it to be the best option in the game. Just as competitive as swords or spears or whatever else.

Hate. I think if there were a lot less hate, there would be a lot more working together to solve problems like hungry, bad economy, unemployment and poverty.

The fuck are you talking about?

I think in the core of a lot of these problems, a lot of it stems from hate. You don't believe the same things I do... thus I hate you. I think if everyone could just agree to disagree, without all the hate, life would be better. You could practice your religion, I could practice mine. You could vote for your candidate, and I can vote for mine.

And we'd all cancel each other out and get nothing accomplished.
No, hate is pretty much the sole reason we've gotten this far as a species.
I don't even need to get into how Orwellian the concept of obliterating an emotion to make the world a better place is.
Why stop at hate? Why not get rid of anger? Or sadness? Why not get rid of happiness too, because surely the desire to be happy drives people to be ambitious and might therefore make someone else sad?
Just get rid of all emotions so everyone can be your automatons.

I was such an emo girl before the celexa... How did anyone manage to be my friend? Then... I've gotten so boring... how does anyone manage now?

I used to feel things before the pills made me comfortably numb.
How in the fuck can you write a phrase like "I used to have emotions before Celexa" and not immediately think "Jesus Christ I really need to stop taking Celexa"?
I guess Celexa makes you compliant and indifferent so you won't initiate the behavior of not being on Celexa.

Sometimes I miss the over emotional Lauren. I miss those intense feelings. I was more passionate, about everything.

THE PILLS TOOK MY PASSION.
How horrifying must that be to be fully aware that this has happened and yet totally indifferent to do anything about it?
Well "horrifying" in a relative sense because I'm guessing that's a vestigial word for an emotion she can no longer feel.

I'm feeling stuck. Not with Matt. Matt's fine. Just with me. I need something I'm not giving myself. I don't know what it is, or how I find it.

Get off pills, learn a little willpower to keep your emotions in check.
There, found it.

Good news first! I got a job! It's part part time. I'll be filing at my husbands work when they need me. No more than 10 hours a week... but it's extra money! I always thought that if I got ANY work, they'd just deduct it from my social security, and I'd just receive less each month.

Yeah she's on social security. She has, errr, CF.
I didn't know what that stood for but I Googled it and it stands for cystic fibrosis.
There's an entire novel on the front page of the CF Foundation about what it is but if I had to summarize it it's basically your organs don't work quite right.
But evidently she's well enough to work so why isn't she?

I didn't realize I could work a little bit and still collect. Which is good, because on top of being "as needed" this job is seasonal.

Oh yeah, it's so good to double dip.
You know they're voting on a bill in congress to censor the internet and we're sinking further in debt as the Republican parasites agree with the Democrat leeches to further suck this country dry and the Chinese are starting to undo the final checks to complete military domination but as long as we live in a great welfare police state where everyone is on pills to keep them from feeling those pesky emotions or thinking those scary thoughts then I guess it'll all work out for the best, eh?

I feel very frustrated with my family right now. I know it must irritate them that I do less chores and don't work. I get it. But I can't explain to them how I PHYSICALLY feel without someone jumping down my throat. I better call the doctor if I'm unable to do x, y or z because I should be able to do more. So it's either call the doctor, or I must be exaggerating, and I get an eye roll when I state that I can't do something.

See even the family that loves you so much (there was a really long and sappy post I skipped [you're welcome] on the subject) knows you're full of shit.

How do I explain to them that sometimes, being up and about is TIRING for me.

It's tiring for you?
It's tiring for everyone.
Suffering is a big part of the human condition.
And I don't mean that in some emo WOE IS MEEEEE kind of way. People do shit they don't want to do all the time. It's just what you have to do.

So I'm throwing a 4th of July party. I want to go ALL OUT. I'm considering getting a package deal with the bouncy house people and getting a cotton candy maker and helium balloons for an extra $30. I've been looking up party decorations, games and ideas all day. I want this to be a HUGE big deal.

Not too sick to have a party that is "a HUGE (your emphasis)" deal, eh?

If you were a cross-breed between two animals, what animals would they be, and why?

MAN
AND MACHINE
wait no, machines aren't animals.

I'm finding today emotionally trying. It's hard to see half your list on facebook posting about mother's day with beautiful pictures of newborns. It's something I want so bad, and today seems to be a day that it's rubbed in my face that I can't have it.

For the best, I say. You'd neglect that thing.

So, the white coats said no. Apparently, double organ transplants are not done.

Because our medical science is barbaric and primitive.
GIVE ME TWENTY YEARS AND I WILL SHOW YOU TRUE MEDICINE.
Okay so I wandered off for like 8 hours to do other things but check this fucking shit out:

And the crown:
sure is fancy~
I want that other blue crown now. Have to do all sorts of materia melding and shit for that, though.
Anyway the entire point of this post is pretty much to show off this crown. I've done that so now I'm going
FAREWELL INTERNET FRIENDS.

You people

I swear you people are conspiring to just be up on my tits today. What was with that party today, FFXIV community? I was trying to level archer to 50 because it's my last disciple of war not at 50 but nooo now I'm not going to get to do that before the new patch. Thanks a fuckload, assholes.
How hard is it to pretend to be normal and just grind shit out the way we used to back in the day? You don't need a marauder to get experience. I mean it'll be shitty experience but at least some experience is better than no experience--
I don't want to talk about it.
What I do want to talk about, however, is bitches with health problems.

What is your must-see holiday movie?

One random answer will win a $50 Amazon gift card.

Today's writer's block.
The answer is Die Hard.

Love Actually <3

Die Hard.

I got glutened again. That's where I've been. It's a 6.5 day cycle to get better afterward. Blame Chipotle and their deceptively inviting website that claims it is possible to eat there if you have gluten issues. Uh, no.

"I have a very sensitive system that requires a specific diet"
"let me eat Mexican"
There's this skill called logical induction and you didn't use it here.
You know, logical induction? That part of your brain that lets you analyze patterns to determine rules?
As a rule Mexican food is going to be a starch/meat/cheese disaster so if you have special eating habits it's generally not advisable to eat Mexican.

Cross contamination nightmare. It got me and it got me good. Fortunately I didn't like what I ordered and hardly ate any of it or it might have been worse. I just now have my correct temperament coming back.

Oh, your temperament issues. That's why you're a cunt.
DAMN YOU, GLUTEN!

Good news! When I am not under the effects of gluten brain I feel like writing again. And it is good stuff. I've been struggling for years to get back to the ease I had during college. I've got my mojo back! So what do I start writing immediately...

Let's see, you're out of practice so a good writer would probably immediately write a short story or something that has a certain economy with words so you can focus on the other important skills of writing.
Of course, Livejournal being Livejournal the answer is fanfiction.
Smutty fanfiction, no doubt.

the lowest of the low of the fan fiction genre. I have no shame. It must be written! What I am writing is basically soppy shoujo.

Or "pseudo-lesbian encounters" as we say in English. I'm going to give myself full points for that one, though.

I've been absent lately. There has been a zillion reasons for this. The most recent being that I glutened myself on Sunday after making it through all the holiday eating unscathed, and am pretty much useless right now.

As opposed to other times when you're positively productive.

There is a big mood swing that hits when you are glutened and I noticed it this time. Like I was observing myself from afar and tisk-tisking myself in disapproval. I can see that my reactions are different but besides limiting the situations and opportunities of bitchiness I am exposed to I can't really seem to change my reactions. Raging bitch mode, activated.

Couldn't that be a personality flaw and not the protein found in wheat?

At least I know what's going there. Month's prior to figuring out my diagnosis I just thought I had lost my ability to deal with stuff. I'd think, "I've been through way worse than this? Why am I not able to shrug this off?" Damn gluten.

Have you ever seen a shitty 80s action movie where a guy suddenly gains super powers because he's on PCP?
I'm suddenly reminded of that situation, only with gluten.
And instead of super powers it's whining.
So it's nothing like that. Ignore me.

The Christmas party for work is going to be at the country club instead of my boss's house. And catered. So I won't be able to eat anything short of dry carrot sticks. I had planned on bringing stuff to her house, but I can't bring stuff to the country club. I'm thinking about not going at all. I do not want to be glutened right before Christmas.

Or you can go and not eat.
Except it'd be really boring but if that's what you're expected to do--
I dunno.
I'd say fuck it and play the juego myself.

I locked myself out of my apartment today. It was one of those, "This purse doesn't go with this outfit. I can just stick my phone in my waistband and hold my usb and wallet...now out the door..." (click) "Oh no! My keys! In my purse! Noooo...." (second later) "Interesting."

Time to kick in the front door I suppose.
Also what's interesting about locking yourself out of your apartment like a dumbfuck?

This work week was something else. Working late every night again. Boss off today and Monday. Copywriter off yesterday and today. I don't know what the hell is going on only that I have two computers and five monitors that I am working on and a zillion windows open. As I shut down tonight it was like excavating down to the desktop background level and restoring things back to 8AM conditions.

Do you really need to tell the world this?
LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT MY COPY EDITING JOB, LIVEJOURNAL.

My normally rock solid and collected podmate went a little nuts today, understandably, but as the calm center of the pod him going crazy threw the rest of us off. J_ started laughing and throwing zingers at everything and he rarely acts like that and my sailor vocabulary while driving has turned into sailor desk jockey.

That doesn't even make sense.
Sailor desk jockey, what?
Why am I reading about this?
What is wrong with you?

Plotting. Intrigue. Just another week at an ad agency. Mad Men is coming back you say?

This plotting and intrigue sounds like a bunch of cunts whining about bullshit. Machiavelli would be sorely disappointed in this.

And on that note, I drove out to B&N over my lunch hour to pick up the ESPN Body Issue and they didn't have it. I didn't realize how awkward it would be to ask someone there if they did have it. "Which is it?" "It's the one...well...you see..." I was an art student. This shouldn't be awkward. Stop judging me!

"I want that Sorts Illustrated with tits prominently on display."
Don't be a pussy, good grief.

There was a Danish guy in the office today. So yeah, I had trouble concentrating. I love that particular accent. Could listen to it all day...and I did.

I'm having these delicious crackers with more gluten than you can fucking imagine right now.
Oh man these are good.
How can you not eat wheat?
The ability to eat wheat is practically what separates us from animals. And you live in Texas, so what I'm getting is you're not even human. Why am I reading your pig squeals, again?

An interesting fact about you: I applied to the CIA twice.

You know you're not supposed to say you applied.
SHHHHHHH.
This is why they didn't hire you.
Can't keep a secret and you want to work for an agency based entirely around keeping secrets. Good fucking job.
They probably took one look at this blog and said "no, she'll post top secret shit all over this and we'll be nuked within the hour."
Here's a post entitled "I was going to fill out that NPR's 100 most popular scifi list..."
I can't wait to hear your opinions on scifi.

...but I don't think I'll bother. That isn't the list you should be looking at to read anyway. Look at the semifinalists.

I left the link in for once because, ehh.
Except for Stephen King appearing on the list three times, Neil Gaiman three times, Margaret Atwood twice and not a single mention of Roadside Picnic it looks like a damn solid list. It even included Armor and A Scanner Darkly.

The people who didn't make it.

Except for Arkady and Boris Struatsky I don't think they've missed any important names in science fiction. I mean except for the fact they included some hacks you have all the important people like Philip K. Dick, Robert Heinlein, Isaac Asimov, etc etc.
Jesus Christ my BFF Dan Abnett made the list, even, for The Eisenhorn Trilogy. A Warhammer book got a nod on this list.
Of course you shouldn't expect a mention of Arkady and Boris Struatsky because you're dealing with the pretentious douchebags at NPR that wouldn't know good writing if it hit them in the face.
The fact we're determining a reading list by popular vote instead of, you know, reading shit and figuring out what you personally like is a pretty good indication of the level of plebeian we're dealing with here.
That said this is arguably the best "best of" list I've ever seen.

If you've read a decent number on the top 100 stop right there and look at the ones who didn't make the final cut.

I already said Arkady and Boris Struatsky.
And while I'm talking about authors with unpronounceable Eastern European names: Andrzej Sapkowski also isn't on the list.

Find all the female authors on there and then read those. THAT will really broaden your reading experience.

No thanks.
That's a critical misstep of logic to assume diverse thoughts come from a diverse group of people (protip: a rainbow coalition can come up with the exact same tripe a group of white, heterosexual white guys can) but I don't even need to get into that when the first female author mentioned is Margaret Atwood.
The biggest female name on this list by far is Mary Shelley and while she absolutely belongs on this list I'd hardly call high school reading a great broadening of horizons.

The lack of some of them on the top 100 seems to me to indicate y'all just haven't read them.

I called them plebeian but the fact a Warhammer book and Armor made it to the list indicates they're slightly better read on the subject than you might suspect.
Why The Eisenhorn Omnibus got the nod and not the infinitely superior Legion is beyond me (I suspect sales had something to do with it) but I can't really fault them over this.
I also find it very interesting that despite not including enough female authors (as if gender is indicative of writing quality) you fail to mention a single name they forgot. I came up with three without even really looking and I just thought of another: H.P. Lovecraft.
In fact, now that I'm looking at this list it dawns on me that the founder of modern science fiction is a woman and she's not on this list. Margaret Cavendish probably should have been mentioned.
Maybe they didn't want two Margarets on the same list.
Cut the other one then, Christ.
But my point still stands. This argument from political correctness is about as much of an intellectual cop out as picking on someone's typos. I know I do that often but I'm seldom making an intellectual argument so it's not hypocritical-- I think--

I went out to the store a couple hours ago because I was out of food (seriously, this stupid app that makes me eat more is busting the bank now) and while selecting some brussels sprouts from the produce area a middle aged dude who worked there tried about four or five times to strike up a conversation with me.

No I already solved women's issues. Go for the eyes. We've been over this how many times now?

His final attempt went like this:

"Are you shopping after school?"

"No, I got hungry. Eventually the food runs out and you have to go to a place like this to get more."

No shit? Is that what you do at a grocery store?
Thanks for the heads up.

"It just looked like you were shopping after school."

I hold up a sprout and look at it. Eyebrow raised. Sprouts are not for kids you know.

"I am much too old for that."

"I - I - I meant college." At this point I think he realized he was in way over his head.

"Ok. Thanks. Well, you have a nice day."

That'll show him.
Being nice to customers, what a dick!

I almost immediately call my sister on the phone and tell her the description of the dude just in case I go missing. Sadly I do this fairly often. Can't resist a girl shifting through the bin of brussels sprouts I guess.

I sure can.
>trying to strike up conversation with a girl
>you're instantly a loser and a rapist
I've said it before and I'll say it again: brown girls, people.
Your rewards for talking to your average American woman are like what's above.
People have tried to make the argument that not all American women are like that (enough are that Guess Who made a song about it) but that is a fair point so I'd like to address that briefly.
You know how two entries ago we agreed it was probably smart to assume all men are going to rape you even if a vast majority aren't just because it's safer?
Welcome. Welcome to the same logic.

I watched ThunderCats episode one at work today in the conference room. Besides there being cats in it (furries, uck) and an over abundance of silly that I left in the past, my male coworkers all liked it.

NO SHIT, A SHOW CALLED THE THUNDERCATS HAD CATS IN IT?
OH MAN!
If you tell me Dragonball Z has things called Dragonballs in it you're officially crazy.
Also I like the remake, even if Lion-o is missing his righteous 80s mullet.

I am not going to begrudge kids their fun, but I don't think it is for me.

For someone who writes fanfiction that came off awfully snobbish.
Ooooooh goodness.
Anyway this is really boring so I'm going to go do something else with my life now.
FFXIV PATCH TOMORROW AND MY ARCHER ISN'T 50 FUCK.

Heresy

Why is every blogger the same
Why can't we just admit they're all one hive mind entity?

Which December holidays do you celebrate, and why?

One random answer will win a $50 Amazon gift card.

All December holidays are heretical.

None. I celebrate Diwali, which comes in November or late October.

You celebrate what?
That shit ain't real. You just made that up.

Diwali (also spelled Devali in certain regions) or Deepavali, popularly known as the "festival of lights," is a festival celebrated between mid-October and mid-December for different reasons

Thanks Wikipedia.
Wikipedia says it does happen in December but whatever this is new to me.
Eh.
Here's an excerpt for some book she's written for that national write a book month or whatever.
I'm sure this will be great.

“Just think about that next time you want to fight, Seri,” he whispers sensually in my ear. My breath turns erratic and I swear I can feel Darionn’s lips twitch into a smirk next to my ear before he releases me and I spin around, panting heavily.

Oh cut right to the seductive and sexy scenes.

“Thank you,” I say; my words are a little louder than a whisper, so Neil, Coli, and Kerian, they, still shocked, can hear, but lower than normal. Darionn shows me a wry smile with a bitter sadness layering it, and I know he understands my gratitude and how much I’m truly grateful for. When we both finally turn back to our three friends, I finally, belatedly and vaguely realized that I didn’t cut off that fated sentence this time around. Maybe I’m forgiven, after all.

What is editing for wordiness?
Here, I'll even cut the parts you don't need.
I will keep 100% of the same message.
I also edited a bit for grammar there because you have to keep the same tense otherwise it stops making sense.
The idea still sucks, incidentally, so I couldn't work miracles but at least it's workable now.
By "workable" I mean "doesn't make me want to vomit blood." but it's still pretty bad. I mean I can't know what this story is about based off a couple of unrelated sentences but the fact your main character thinks she's magically redeemed because her friends approve of her actions shows she's a pretty weak person.
I mean maybe it's unfair to compare it to my own characterization but I have a similarly unredeemed character and he basically goes unredeemed for the entirety out of the plot.
Of course he didn't actually do what he was shamed over so it became more of an internal struggle over feelings of failure and inadequacy and his entire life becomes a quest to prove he's not a coward by undertaking increasingly suicidal missions but then again I don't think I can expect a level of complexity such as "perception versus reality" in a character generated in less than five minutes from a girl who writes fanfiction.

Once my hair is complete, I work on my body, from head to toe. First I scrub the dirt streaks from my cheeks and forehead, where the dust has mixed with my sweat and formed a muddy substance that sticks to my skin. I showered.

Here, let me fix this. If you can express something with fewer words you should.

Do you prefer fiction or non-fiction? Explain why.

Fiction. Where else can I find overly long descriptions of showering?

Fiction. Most definitely. It leaves room for imagination and make-believe.

Except, you know, when you describe mundane, everyday shit everyone does in detail.

Reality...truly...it's just a faceplant in the dirt of pain after you fall. It's an alarm clock ringing and blaring during a particularly amazing dream. It's just an "Earth to you" moment that rouses you from a daydream. Fiction is different. It doesn't follow reality,

Wow easy there, deep thinker. FICTION ISN'T REALITY.

nor the rules that come with it. I can't write myself a new life, and I doubt I would want to anyway, but storytelling is a tradition that has been passed down from the ancient times of Homer.

That's right. Homer invented stories.
Homer invented speaking for the purpose of telling the Odyssey.

So, xsilentserenity, your LiveJournal reveals…
You are… 0% unique, 12% peculiar, 16% interesting, 40% normal and 32% herdlike

0% Unique. You heard it here first.

My reaction: 0% unique? What? For your information, Mr. Random Thing I randomly found on someone else's journal, I came up with my own idea for my own fanfic, and I am currently working on it and I did not steal it from anyone else.

>Fanfiction
>creating derivative ideas from another person's imagination
I AM UNIQUE FOR YOUR INFORMATION.
Yeah except not really.
Also yeah you did steal it from someone else. Whoever came up with the idea. That's who you stole it from.
I'm going to write an awesome fanfiction about Kenshiro from Fist of the North Star and he's going to fight a bad guy for honor and justice ad he's going to look stern and say "you are already dead" but I AM TOTALLY UNIQUE AND ORIGINAL.

I've been bullied a lot in my life, and for many different reasons. At first, in first grade, it was because I was just four months younger than everyone else. I was 5 at the time, and constantly mocked, hearing things like "Go back to Kindergarten, where you belong!" I must admit, that girl, Jamie, as I still clearly remember her name is, hurt me quite some, and left me in the dark of what I should do. I just remember being really depressed, and self conscious.

I really care about whatever the fuck it is I'm reading.

I was later bullied because of my religion in 3rd grade. They were two very religious Christians, both of which I had befriended early in the year. But, when they found out I was a Hindu, the bullying began.

You'd think the fact she's (maybe) a brown girl would get her some slack from me.
Nope.
Cunts are cunts.

It was different this time, and there was no mockery, just beliefs being thrown at me. Wrong beliefs, telling me that I would go to Hell, and that I would never reach God, or be a good person.

Christian, Hindu-- all heretics.
Oh my God this goes on and on about the religion and bullying. Get thicker skin, Jesus. Stop teasing the Hindu girl about being a Hindu. Neither of your religions' gods are as cool as Zeus, anyway, so you're all just compensating.

I'm so depressed right noww... I just got my grade back for a biology test. I had an 89 before, and I needed a 90+ to raise my average, but I got an 83, after studying my butt off, too.

>83%
>biology 101
>getting less than a 98% in biology
I SERIOUSLY HOPE
YOU GUYS ARE SMARTER THAN THIS
Here's a post entitled "a few heartfelt thoughts on gay marriage" and I really give a shit about this so let me read it.

Well, I originally posted this on miracle, but since it didn't have much to do with SJ, it got taken down /I'm such an idiot for trying. I just wanted a lot of people to read it. Anyways, I've always loved fanfictions, and when I found BL, it became even greater, and now I've become a major shipper. But what really shocked and disappointed me today was my friend's reaction when I told her about BL and communities like this.

You have a major problem with too much information.
Why do I gotta know like that? Why can't you just get to the point about your stupid problem and gays?

The conversation went something like this:
Me: /telling the plot of one of my favorite fanfics. "By the way, do you know a gay person?"
Her: "No. I don't hang out with those kinds of people."
Me: Those kinds of people?!
Her: Yeah, I don't an to be friends with that kind of person. It's weird.
Me: /getting really mad. " Weird? What's weird? Him, or a friendship with him?"
"Him.....butonlytome!"
"So if you were already friends?"
"Then I would stop being friends with them."

I can respect firm conviction but you're still an ignorant slob.

At that point, I just sighed and turned around, completely fed up. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

You couldn't believe what you were hearing?
I sure can.

All this time she had said that she had nothing against them, yet she just so easily calls gays weird.

Why can't you just agree to disagree?

I'm not lesbian or bi, but that really offended me!

Oh God, get thicker skin. You're getting offended over something that doesn't even affect you.

It's not wrong to love, despite gender or age, in my mind.

There you go, it's not wrong to love despite age.
Go wild, pedophiles.
HOW ELSE AM I SUPPOSED TO INTERPRET THAT?
I know I've twisted this argument around before to say "hurrr that means you can have sex with kids" just to troll but she just literally said it's not wrong to love despite age. What else could that mean?

It's a fact that there are millions of people hating on homosexuals everyday, but it's something we can't change. But when I hear someone so close to me say something that hurful, it makes a big impact on me, and makes me really sad, to tellthe truth.

It warms my heart. Mingling with the common folk always narrows the mind wonderfully.

They are places for people to communicate, write, discuss in comments, and wholeheartedly accept gay relationships. I mean, that's what this fandom is, ne?

>ne
No, stop.

In fact, I would love to be friends with anyone decent enough to see that love is love, no matter who, what, or why.
Thank you all,
Seri

Seri, baby, we gotta talk.
No one is more interested in talking to an articulate brown girl than I but you really have to cool it with this whining and binting around.
I don't know what you look like and I won't say your looks aren't important but I'd really hate to think this blog is spoiling an otherwise perfectly fine brown girl.

Music:Set Fire to the Rain - Adele

I say "this blog" but it's really a personality flaw.
Surely that can be corrected.
And I'm up to the very beginning of this blog, thankfully.