Quick, go here.
Good now that's out of the way let's get started.
Describe your life in one sentence.
Man the writer's blocks have been really good in that they're really awful lately.
Seeking, surviving.
Soooo fucking deep.
Actually I think that'd be a good summary of my life. "Sooo fucking deep" in a sarcastic tone.
Music:Tori Amos - Leather | Powered by Last.fm
Oh God I'm in for it now.
Listening to Tori Amos while writing that, seriously? I can smell the douching products through my monitor.
I've always maintained that journalism is a career that depends less on a degree and more on ambition, cunning, determination, and all that other deviously good stuff.
I hope you're in for a disappointment because I've applied to journalist jobs and despite being a college graduate in a relevant field I got turned down because my degree wasn't specifically in journalism or I didn't already have years of experience in journalism.
In fact, after careful scrutiny of the field I can't think of a harsher field to get into right now. You know newspapers are kind of becoming a thing of the past and people would rather get their news through blog posts?
I mean we can discuss the implications of what it means to rely on cunts like you to generate non-biased stories but I think the thing you should be taking from this is you aren't going to be a journalist.
Everyone lost their job. Why hire you, novitiate, when they can just as easily hire someone with 50 years' experience?
Still, just about every PR firm/ad agency/communications department is out for someone with a minimum of five years experience and a Masters. What do you need a Masters for when all you do all day is make other people's work (or screw-ups) sound prettier?!
Ergo, I need experience to get the job I want.
I need a job to get the experience I need.
Apply for a shitty sales job, pray for death.
Also I think this is where your cunning would come in. You can make it ahead in retail, you know. Those jobs aren't exactly easy to acquire anymore either (speaking from personal experience now) but it can be done and a sight easier than journalism.
Ugh.
Thank God I'm at least employed, even if it is only freelancing. As to how that came around, the paper I interned for wanted to keep me on as a contributing writer (an honor which, according to my Dad, they rarely grant interns, so yay for ego boost).
So what's the fucking problem?
You're getting journalism experience. What, do you expect to be instantly recognized because you graduated college? That's not how the world works.
Sounds like daddy has you covered regardless. I'm guessing he got you the internship and pulled the strings to keep you around in the first place.
You should probably be asking him to teach you his power.
Oh well, it shouldn't be anything to complain about. I'm earning something and it does contribute to tackling a few expenses. I'm 21 and alive; there's enough fight in me.
I had to pee in a cup yesterday.
I think she debated sticking around to see if I wouldn't fuck around with the test which was fine but if she stuck around she better stand the fuck back because this is going to be a piss for the songs.
I didn't even know a human could hold that much piss.
Took the Enneagram Type Test and got some scarily accurate results. I'm a Type 4, aptly titled the Individualist. Key adjectives: sensitive, introspective, expressive, dramatic, self-absorbed, and temperamental.
Enneagram tests telling bloggers they're self-absorbed.
IT TRULY IS THE FUTURE.
I wonder how much money has been spent collectively on these personality tests and all for what? To conclude that someone who talks about herself all the time is self-absorbed?
It probably even outright asked her "do you spend a lot of time thinking about yourself?" and then you answer yes and it says "oh I get it you're conceited" and then WOOOOW SO FUCKING ACCURATE.
Apparently, I'm in good company. Famous Type 4's include Ingmar Bergman, Alanis Morrisette, Paul Simon, Bob Dylan (who, coincidentally, I was stamped as on LJ's musical_legends rating community), Johnny Depp, Anne Rice, J.D.Salinger, Edgar Allen Poe, Annie Lennox, Michael Jackson, and Virginia Woolf.
I can't imagine wanting to be associated with Alanis Morrisette or Anne Rice but whatever.
Or Bob Dylan, I mean goddamn. Robert Zimmerman, have you seen the guy? Can't sing, can't act, known as a singer and actor. Great.
Jesus Christ you have to pay ten bucks to take this test. What a crock.
Here, I have an idea. You pay me ten bucks and I will ask you a bunch of questions about bullshit for ten minutes then using my magical powers I'll be able to tell you what you're like.
You aren't even plugged into a machine. This is pure psychic might from a class Alpha+ psyker.
Time's been good to me. I no longer look as awkward while I'm at it, walking alone down my path. Have I grown used to that idea, The Loner? I don't look as lonesome anymore. I have grown into the 'strong, silent' label that comes with natural introversion. Independent, observant, content to travel this road by myself if there was no one to keep pace beside.
Time has been good to you?
You're 21, what the fuck are you talking about? Of course time has been good to you, it hasn't even done anything yet.
You're supposed to say that shit when you're 90 and have grandchildren and you're looking back. You don't have anything to look back on.
'The Scorpio tends to be self-destructive since they use passion in most everything they do. They end up hurting themselves emotionally or physically, but they regenerate, transform and are reborn.'
... I see.
Oh God why?
Ever notice when a bitch posts about her zodiac the blog is especially insufferable?
I've been thinking of getting myself a Nook or Kindle, once I have enough set aside after next month's pay-check rolls in. It'd save me shelf-space since all classics happen to come free of charge.
Yeah they're not the only books that come free of charge if you're smart.
Though, I'll admit, the feel of a solid block of paper beneath my hands will be something I'd miss. I dunno, maybe I'm just sentimental. About books, imaginary places and characters, of course.
What are you, stupid?
Had a fun time on Tumblr, going through memes and gifs featuring games I liked. Haven't picked up a controller in a while though. I like gaming, I appreciate what certain series have given me through fanfiction and entertainment, but I don't think I'll ever be as into it as I once was.
Further proof all girls care about in terms of gaming is fucking fanfiction and ruining games.
"Oh, so she's completed her degree as well? Wonderful! Time to start looking for someone suitable, I think..."
"You prefer Malay boys, of course? Not that there aren't any Moors up for grabs, just so you know..."
Moors up for grabs?
What, did you stumble into the 18th century?
Thus, my life has turned into a Jane Austen novel. Only with no Fitzwilliam Darcy, Frederick Wentworth, or Colonel Brandon in sight.
Except you're making this shit up and you should probably shut up.
Hopefully, this is how it stays until A) I have a steady job which won't require me to be dependent on a man of all creatures for money, and B) when, miracle of miracles, I am ready.
What other kind of creature would you rely on for money?
Other women?
Animals?
She puts that in italics like how dare someone suggest it but if you have children in all likelihood you're going to be relying on your husband for support.
Now, off to dig up my copy of Pride and Prejudice. I think I'll need to keep some wittily-phrased rejection speeches handy.
All right, it was a friendly suggestion. No need to get pretentious.
Not that you need an excuse but you could at least spare the young, the elderly and the invalid.
You know even a lot of tyrants had the common decency to spare the elderly.
I visit the Tekken fanfiction section and find this...
TEKKEN
FANFICTION
FANFICTION ABOUT A FIGHTING GAME.
These games have literally no plot and no character development. What the actual fuck are you doing?
Here's how character selection in a fighting game goes:
"I have no clue what I'm doing so let's just try all these out for a few minutes--" and then you pick the one you suck least at.
Or in my case with Soul Calibur V you get to the third character on the list, Natsu, and decide THAT'S FAR ENOUGH.
And I now have a 77% win ratio online.
Nobody sees that weeaboo fightan magic coming.
What's her character? What's her motivation?
I don't know. She looks Irish but her name is Natsu and she's some kind of ninja.
I reckon she was somehow adopted at birth by a clan of ninja but who the fuck knows THIS GAME HAS NO PLOT LIKE ALL FIGHTING GAMES.
But as silly and pretentious as that is, that's not what bothered me about the fic. Rather, check out one of the reviews it got:
Well you'd know pretentious.
'i personally still deem a guy that punched me in the face as gd lukin in reality BUT jin is the execption lol!'
What?
Sorry, I don't speak pig.
All I got from this is you maybe want to be punched in the face (which can be arranged) but otherwise I don't understand.
I really hope that that was just a careless comment and not a statement of the reviewer's personal beliefs. If it is indeed the latter, then this world makes me sad.
Well as the wise man Snoop Dogg once said: "bitches ain't shit but hoes and tricks."
24. Betaing - how many betas do you like to use to make sure there aren't any major flaws in your fic? Do you have a Beta horror story or dream story?
"Betaing" or "proofreading" to non-idiots.
You do realize there's a very real difference between video games and books, right?
17. Titles - are they the bane of your existence or the easiest part of the fic? Also, if you do chaptered fics, do you give each chapter a title or not?
Who cares about titles?
Don't even bother until you're done then spend like five seconds thinking about the horror you just unleashed on the world because you're a fanfiction writing loooooser and then just succinctly summarize it.
I know you morons don't understand what "succinct" really means so I'll explain: you have three to four words to explain yourself.
I think I hate these more than the summaries. Sometimes I do have a title in mind before I even start writing the fic but mostly, I come up with one derived from some aspect of the plot.
Summaries are even easier.
If you cannot write a summary of your story you might be writing chick lit which has no plot but 50 subplots and therefore becomes very difficult to accurately summarize.
16. Summaries - do you like them or hate them? How do you come up with them, if you use them?
I hate them. Especially concerning my multi-chaps. My plot-lines often grow more complex as they develop and it can be difficult to capture the essence of that in a few lines.
Your plots should never "grow complex" because the plot is a framework for why shit happens.
Plot for A Few Dollars More?
Two bounty hunters want to kill a bandit for different reasons.
Plot to Star Wars?
Guy comes of age and wants to be a great warrior.
Plot to Frankenstein?
Guy makes an eldtrich abomination and wishes he hadn't.
I summarized four movies and a book in three sentences.
Now let's focus on why this doesn't work for chick lit. I'm going to take a beloved classic that I like, even, but this perfectly summarizes where you run into problems with the "I forgot a main plot" thing.
Plot to To Kill a Mockingbird?
Well a girl and her brother are coming of age but the brother is having more angst than the daughter because she's younger and meanwhile they're in the South while their father has to represent a black man in court and there's a lot of racial tension but there's also this retard that lives next door--
Can't exclude any of this because all of this shit is as relevant to the plot as the other stuff you do include. What's the main point of the story?
I guess the literate have concluded it's the court shit but I don't know why they decided that. I guess because Atticus is an adult and the kids are just kids and aren't really in control of what happens to them.
This kind of setup works for To Kill a Mockingbird because it's one of those books with an axe to grind and therefore should focus on the characters in exclusion to all else but really this is not a setup that works favorably in most circumstances.
Writing fanfic has made me see a lot of the faults in Namco's characterization, especially. The main mistake I mentioned above is one they've repeatedly made with their main characters. Rather than giving them some much-needed dimension, they pile on more characters with connections to them and commit the same crime with them.
That's because they're fighting games and they have to add new characters to keep people playing.
These games aren't about stories.
If you idiots focused on what you should do instead of what you want to do your stories probably wouldn't suck so much.
This is also why Namco has the franchise that made millions and you idiots are writing fan stories.
Ohhhh goodness.
This entry has gone on long enough AND WHAT'S THIS? ONE HOUR UNTIL TERA BETA?
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