IT IS GOOD TO BE EL PRESIDENTE

I got Tropico 4 on sale today for ten whole dollars so let's see if I can be a communist dictator of a small Caribbean nation while reading shitty blogs.
I got this off the pope story.
Because there's a new pope you know.
ONTD_P is surprisingly insensitive about religion and the guy's age.
AGEISM AND RELIGIOUSISM
CHECK YOUR FUCKING PRIVILEGE, ONTD_P
CAN I GET A TRIGGER WARNING?

I've been awake since 6:30 am and going since 8:00 am.

RA training ran from 8:30 to 5:00 just now.

What's RA?
Is that an army thing?
Can't imagine one of these ONTD_P snowflakes joining the army.
I'll ask my bro on Steam.
He's too busy being el presidente too.
Fucking
well I'm going to assume no it isn't an army thing.
Well I've consulted my team of scholars and we've determined it's resident advisor. It says so in the comments.
Which ordinarily I'd read but you know.
El Presidente.

Last week or so I wanted some new jeans that fit nice because my hips are too big for the old ones, and Old Navy was having a buy 2 get 1 free sale on everything in the store.

Yes.
Her hips are too big.
She has swinging hips, guys.
Sexy lady.

Definitely not a fat ass, okay.
Because I am now weirdly-sized and pear-shaped I went into the fitting room to try on jeans.

But not fat. She just has huge tits and hips.
Tiny waist. 

I guessed that I was a size 4 because that seems to be what I'm getting in most other stores (except for American Eagle - this was the precipitate for this trip, as I have a pair of American Eagle's skinny jeans that I could not get comfortably over my hips anymore. They are a size 6.)

Gentlemen.
Check your fucking cis privilege.

Old Navy has four rises for women - the Diva (sits on hips), the Flirt (sits below waist), the Sweetheart (sits at waist) and the Dreamer (sits at waist with a control panel at the tummy).

What the fuck is wrong with Old Navy now?
Can you please not encourage these cunts?
I know you're out to make money but me, el presidente, needs you guys to cool it.

My first-authored paper got a revise and resubmit!!

For my non-academic peeps, this is good because papers are almost never accepted on the first time, but that means that it wasn't so shitty they decided to just reject it outright (which also happens). Hooray! 

Submitting it to a scholarly journal.
Bet it's not a medical or scientific one.
Bet it's like feminist theory or something.

So I'm into Glee. I watch it on Hulu, sometimes. There was an episode focused around Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" song, where the glee teacher, Mr. Schuester, teaches the kids to accept themselves for who they are despite whatever personal issue they have that makes them feel less than awesome.

Sounds quali-t.

For those of you who don't watch Glee here's a major character rundown/summary the way the show depicts the kids:

Mr. Schuester: the glee teacher (a white guy)
Ms. Emma Pillsbury: the guidance counselor, who has OCD

Rachel: the Jewish girl
Quinn: The skinny pretty blonde girl
Finn: the white Everyman
Kurt: the stereotypical gay boy
Puck: the Jewish bad boy
Artie: the disabled geek (he uses a wheelchair)
Santana: the bitchy Latina
Brittany: The dumb blonde
Lauren: the fat girl
Tina: the Asian chick
Mercedes: the sassy black girl

All character development reduced to a character's race.
And social justice warriors love this show.
That'd be like me reducing Edmond Dantes from the Count of Monte Cristo to:
Edmond Dantes: Frenchman
You see how that doesn't work with good writing?

1. Rachel and her insecurity about her large nose because she is Jewish

Wow bet they had to reach for that character motivation.
Jesus Christ.

Let me talk about Mercedes for a moment. She's the only major black character in the show. She's heavyset, and has a sassy, neck-snapping personality that she personally describes as being a diva. Sounds familiar? In a show that's all about tearing down stereotypes about certain types of people (and they have succeeded and failed a lot), Mercedes is a stereotype.  

Sounds like the entire fucking show is a stereotype but it's not like your typical TV watcher can handle any serious complexity in a character.
YOU MEAN EDMOND DANTES IS THE GUY I'M SUPPOSED TO BE ROOTING FOR BUT HE DOESN'T ALWAYS ACT LIKE A GOOD GUY?

HELP ME ALEXANDRE DUMAS HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FEEL YOU DIDN'T TELL ME HOW TO THINK!
I like the show but this makes me really upset, especially that in an episode that lightly touched on racial and ethnic issues they completely ignored the issue of Mercedes' race.

The issue of her race.
Issue implies problem.
So it's a problem she's not white?
Check your FUCKING privilege, Melissa.
Her name is Melissa by the way.
You know who else was black?
Alexandre Dumas.
And he's like the third greatest writer of all time.
Fucking racist.
Also I like how this blog has a trigger warning thing about language and the only time she's said a bad word was in the title.
Which wasn't hidden from my virgin eyes.
Good work.

I have been reading this book Sick about the history of the health insurance industry in the past few weeks and it solidified my decision to do some kind of advocating work within the healthcare field to make sure the disadvantaged get care.

Healthcare is free under el presidente.
Also I just brought electricity to the people.
Also free.
Of course the highest paid person makes 180 dollars a year but since everything is free 180 dollars is a KING'S RANSOM.
Well, I should say the highest paid person on the island is me but after me it's this guy.

I've been really interested in issues of healthcare and how low-income folks, people of color, and LGBT people access care and interact with physicians and other health care providers. I still think I might like to be a hospital/healthcare administrator in some capacity.

This is my state's theme, I've decided.

Long story short I thought having a PhD in public health would certainly help in that endeavor. Even if I did go back and get a master's in public administration after getting the PhD and working in the field for a few years. 

Comrades: the reason your healthcare costs you so much.
This woman and leeches like her.

1. If you were going to learn a critical language for serious study (3+ formal years of coursework), which would you pick and why? Critical languages as defined by the government are Arabic, Azerbaijani, Bangla/Bengali, Mandarin Chinese, Hindi, Indonesian, Japanese, Korean, Farsi/Persian, Punjabi, Russian, Turkish, and Urdu.

>Critical language
>Spanish not on the list
I don't even know what the fuck this government does anymore.
The fact Spanish isn't on that list but Russian is proves the intense breakdown of the intelligence community in America.
Dipshits: weak Spanish speaking governments next to the big, scary imperial power that is America
UUUUUUURRRR DUUURRRRR.
Well don't pick Japanese.
As much as we all love fucking anime and video games that's a saturated market.
Korean culture is on the rise.
Learn that.
The army will love you and so will private industry.

2. If you had to choose between Korean (very good for intelligence, security, and government type work) and Japanese (good for business), which would you choose and why?

Wow I didn't even read that before I said that shit.
Black ships come for me I'm ready to join the inquisition.

So why Korean? Well...it's practical. It's on the critical languages list as well, but it's one of the top three critical languages right now (along with Arabic and Mandarin Chinese). Obviously it's because of the inevitably of Korean reunification as well as the threat of North Korea with nuclear arms, 

>Reunification
>inevitable
Why?
Can one describe anything as inevitable?
Anyway I'm going to go be el presidente for a bit then go to bed fuck blogs.

OK.

Sometimes when I'm looking for a blog I find one that isn't overtly offensive but I can tell by the way the cunt writes or some of the little things she puts in there that all I have to do is go back far enough and I'll hit the mother lode.
Also this blog starts with a master fic list so there's that.

ETA: Now with summaries! Gods help us. Don't let them put you off!

I hate it when people say "gods help us" like I doubt you're seriously that invested in some form of paganism so knock it off.

Hello, hello.

This is me, blinking up out of hibernation like a very grumpy bear. I feel a bit...weird, having so few things to post lately. It's unsettling. 

So I can skip this entry because you just admitted you have nothing to say--
why would I read this?
HEY GUYS
JUST ANOTHER BOOORING WEDNESDAY UPDATE MIGHT AS WELL SKIP IT!

Hello! Just thought i'd pop in, wave a bit.
*waves*

There is currently *so much* going on in fandom!

Has there ever been a start to a piece of writing that made you want to read it less?
I'm sure there's some intro to a pussy sensitivity paper I had to read that equals this but nothing immediately springs to mind.
That was more about long term abuse than the sucker punch.

I have so many tabs open and bookmarks and am subscribing to people left and right on AO3. Too much fic, not enough time!!

Again, is that a sentiment you can have?
SO MUCH FANFICTION TO READ!
Let me see.
I'm going to try fanfiction right now.
Surely there's a suitably manly category like Warhammer--

The powersword buzzed like a caged wasp as Kruger swung it desperately at the ork. He felt the blade shudder as it chopped into the greenskin's torso. It let out a scream of pain as it died. The immediate danger over, Kruger quickly looked to see how his squad was faring. One man was down, but the others had finished off their opponents. A group of orks lay where they had been cut down in hand to hand combat.
'Drake, see to the wounded,' Kruger barked over the comlink.
Almost immediately, the corporal's voice came back: 'He's dead, sergeant.'

Because space marines have corporals.
And a corporal would tend to the wounded.
Maybe the shitty chapter you invented for the sake of this awful fanfiction has corporals.
I'm willing to roll with that.
But I'm not willing to roll with this story through all 1,500 words of it.
I can't even begin to tell you how shitty the opening line is.
POWERSWORD (SIC) BUZZED LIKE A CAGED WASP.
What?

Christ, it's hot. Hot and humid and *horrible*. I have our ac set at eighty and it hasn't stopped running for *weeks*. Jayzus. How i loathe summer.

Anyway - lj is being weird for me still, not loading, half-loading, and making commenting a real chore, so my apologies to all and sundry, I have not been commenting like i'd like to. 

I challenge all of you to find a more appropriate reaction to this blog than this video.

School here starts the 18th of August and the whole mechanism is slowly gearing up to full speed. The Bebe needs clothes, and omg, she likes expensive clothes and/or stuff that ships from the UK. Jayzus. Let's go shop at the Hong Kong import site where most everything is three bucks, okay?
*clutches wallet*

You're old enough to have children in school?
What's happened?
I know this happens like every other blog  but it never ceases to give me pause for thought.
More than "oh that chick turned out to be a dude" or whatever.
It's when these cunts have nearly grown children.
When do you stop acting like this?
I guess never.

Just so people know - i am high on Show!Love, and have nothing but praise for Show. That being said, there are spoilers here for the very newest episode.

The show she's such a twat over she just calls Show.
So if you're curious for some reason good luck figuring that out.
THE ONLY SHOW ON TV.
Oh let's be basic here. What could it possibly be?
Dr. Who
Sherlock Holmes of some persuasion
What's that other shitty show?
Supernatural?
Yeah it's Supernatural, upon further research.
Fuck this gay earth.

I just realized something. I am a total asshat. Someone out there, some delightful person, made lovely pdf files of Wolfpack. And linked them to me, and worked very hard to make them pretty and *i*, in Senior Citizen moment of epic proportions, totally forgot to pimp them here, *or* to bookmark where the links are. Jayzus. God.

You didn't really need to explain why you were an asshat.
In fact if you had just posted that I would have taken it as a personal apology, to me, four years before this happened and I wouldn't have posted this.
But no, you had to go on.
There's a picture of you.
You're clearly in your late 30s-early 40s.
What the fuck is the matter with you?

Jesus *Christ*.

I hate LJ tonight, i really fucking do.

Tonight?
How do you not always hate Livejournal?
Sometimes I'll pause in my day and just think about how much I hate Livejournal.
I did it today in fact.
A kid asked me what day it was.
I said Wednesday.
I immediately thought of my own blog
then how much I hated Livejournal.
Then I gave a silent prayer to Ares for my ability to hate.

I'm not actually, by inclination or practice, xian.

A what?
xian?
Zee-ahn.
Kseean.
Oh of course it's Christian.
Xian.
Kill yourself I'm dead fucking serious.
Xian.
Waste my fucking time with that nonsense?
Write it out for fuck's sake.
Hallo.

Okay, so - here's the story. Cat wanted a PC game, so i got it for him for his b-day. One thing - it won't run on his system. It takes a video card that is uber, so...

I'm offering it here. It's called Gears of War. You need Windows Vista or XP, 2.4GHz Intel or 2.0GHz AMD, 1GB RAM, 12GB free hd space and an NVIDIA GeForce 6600 or ATI x700 vid card.

>Geforce 6600
>uber
What--
oh this is 2007.
All right.
What did I have in 2007?
Like a 6500 I think.
GTX 670 now yeah baby.
It can run EVE Online on ultra max.
Then again so can a toaster but whatever.
Speaking of EVE Online my EVE Online character is currently hated by an unknown faction.
Is that cause for concern?
"An unknown faction wants you dead."
Anyway fuck blogs
fuck the internet
fuck the police

OK

OK
OK
OK
OK

I was supposed to hear about my current job / position being reviewed no later than December. In the "BIG CHANGES" note it was noted that there would be a Supplies department supervisor (fulltime) "soon".

Oh guess what don't care.

I completely understand wanting to get the console out before Black Friday.

But Nintendo.

This shouldn't need a System Update right out of the box!!

Seriously system updates take like 20 minutes just cool your shit.

I am extremely happy that the people brought into the Senate are not all rich old white dudes.

Oh to be this stupid.

Holy hell y'all.

A group from the UN might come to "monitor" voting.

I'm about 90% certain at this moment that Mitt Romney will not win this election.

He will, however, steal it and get away with it

Y'ALL
Seriously stop.
Also: America is apparently a third world country.
Also: this didn't even happen. Shut up with the conspiracy theory garbage.

I am only saying this to amuse you all but...

Wearing pants after wearing shorts since March is kind of weird

I mean

Really.

WELL I'M DEEPLY AMUSED AT THIS
HA HA
I AM A ROBOT JOKE INPUT LAUGH OUTPUT

Democracy is dead guys.

Long live our Corporate Overlords.

AND OBAMA LET IT HAPPEN.

see, I can't support NASCAR or funny cars any NASCAR-related activities

I mean - price of gas going up, price of oil affecting many things, so on and so on

how the hell much gas and oil is being wasted per race when there's a souped-up vehicle going 200 mph/for over 200 laps?

... Not that much?
I mean comparatively.
Also they use like 100 octane leaded gas so it's not the same crap you buy so don't even worry about it.

It's throwing me off when they call link a "human" in this game. I'm all, "wtf no he is a Hylian see his pointed ears you silly folks?"

Wouldn't that be like saying "he's not human he's American"?

So randomly - my ringtone for notifications on my phone is currently the clock noise from Majora's Mask. I actually have the sound on tonight and something set it off -
scared the ever-loving crap out of me

>not setting your ringtone as the Codec noise from Metal Gear
>.

For the record, my (retired) mother is making $30 per day substituting for school.

Virginia minimum wage is 7.80.

She works about seven hours.

You do the math.

Uhhh.

Okay so I realize they probably did it so that newbie characters were ~guaranteed~ to catch at least one legendary...

but most Pokeplayers are old and wise enough to know the tricks to catch 'em all, so to speak.

So why the arsebucket is it such a pain and a half to:
A) have a setup to actually CATCH said title legedary
B) set up said legendary to possibly catch a shiny version

given that B requires you to catch a minimum of 740 Pokemon... and it's not like there isn't something like a 1/80K chance or something. Or is it 18K? Either way.

Way to discourage shininess Gamefreak

>not RNG abusing for shininess, perfect nature and IVs
YOUR POWER LEVEL IS PATHETIC.

What's weird is explaining how Pokemon has changed and the (post-G2) mechanics of it to your brother-in-law while in Outback.

Physical/special split in Gen 3 was the most important meta change in Pokemon.

- first gym is a Maid Cafe, you guys.

... No it's not?
It's a cafe.
Just a regular cafe.
Ended up scrolling through like 3 years of entries about soccer and My Little Pony.
The levels of fucks I don't give.
Anyway I guess it's time for bed.
What a fucking waste of an evening.
I can't believe how much time I spent on this and this is all I have to show for it.
If I were Livejournal I'd delete her journal and send her a message saying "no. None of this counts."