Happy birthday Blogger, you smarmy cunt

Today is Blogger's birthday. So thanks, Blogger, for surviving yet another year so I can continue to post my vitriol.
Also I start today's entry in a good mood because Fortune has smiled on me and I found five entire dollars in a gutter today. No, I wasn't searching for goodies there, I just happened to find it. I should invest that lucky five dollars in the stock market or something. More likely it'll go towards parking but still, five bucks.
Anyway let's ruin my good mood.

FINALLY GOT MY EARRINGS YAAYYY

turns out they were, like, locked in a room somewhere. oO I'm like "They weren't that important..." someone probably suspected me of being a home-grown terrorist. I wonder if my shit's gonna do this every time I order from Kai Mei. Probably, but I don't really care because I'm very happy with my order.

Yeah surprisingly when you order from other countries it takes a long time to receive them.

Need to buy more ibuprofen for the line of root canals I won't be treating until next july. Mouth hurrrtttsss.

Where is mah Jamie? ;_; She was supposed to come back for classes today, but we haven't heard from her.

I have so much work to do. And I can't even bring myself to care, how sad is that. @_@

Ugh already looking for something else to do.

Getting teeth surgery: KINDA AKWARD METHINKS.

Akward. Yeah that really is awkward. I'd ask you to qualify that with a reason but this is the fucking internet so I'll just cut to the punch now and call you stupid.

Yeah, it was the closest thing to an out-of-body experience ever. I refuse to have my eyes open for dental work because then I see what they are using in my mouth, and I do not like it much.

I make them show me every single tool but maybe that's just me. I like to think of it as training for if I wind up like the Running Man.

Okay, let me tell you something about dental stitches: they are fucking weird. Why? Because they are sewn through your gum tissue. That's right, folks, in one side and out the other, then loop it around and do it again.

Logically. Not many other places they could sew.

AND HOLY FUCK WILL YOU JUST SHUT THE FUC

K UP. SUCK IT UP NOW. Christ.

I-- what did you just read my mind?

WE DON'T HATE HIM BECAUSE HE READS SHITT

Y BOOKS WE HATE HIM BECAUSE HE'S AN ASSHOLE.

Ha, ha you're all right, kid. I mean, you're still fucking awful, but so far I dislike you less.

Alright, look. Writing beach trash isn't easy because writing ANYTHING isn't easy. However, it is easy to despise a piece of work that is cheap and without character, made to pander to market of sissies who have never in their entire fucking LIVES been changed by what they've read.

Hard being subjective, of course. Hard for you, maybe. Meanwhile in Meland it's piss easy.

Ever popped a pus pocket in you gums?

No, but awesome.

I don't suggest it. It's hella gross. At least Noel wasn't in the room.

It's been..well, not an awful day, but not a fantastic one, either.

No, if I'm popping pus pockets in my gums that day is automatically out of the running for "good".

Midway through Writing for Children my mood plummeted in an eerily familiar manner and remained firmly on the downlow until Advanced Poetry.

Where it plummeted even further until you were just hoping to finish out the day without killing everyone and then yourself.
Oh wait sorry, that's me.
Well, me, at least you didn't have to pop a pus pocket in your gums in between classes.
See, the day can always get worse.

Thusfar, my moodiness has been called 'work mode'. I'm okay with the little white lie.

Not sure what that even means. If you're having reservations about lying, err, don't. Lie constantly. If you can get ahead by lying, lie.

Also, they found that poor girl who disappeared before her wedding day.

Yes, THAT poor girl.

She was in the wall of the lab building. Someone killed her and stuffed her into it.

Well that's a somber ending.

If I kill all the freshmen in the photo barn right now, not a jury in the world will convict me.

Until the prosecution finds this blog, of course, then you get to do a sit down dance for premeditation but whatever.

*has just spent the past half hour listening to sex jokes, tasteless gay humor, and a long rant about how the legal age of consent should be sixteen so that the eighteen year old gay assholecan get some with his underage boyfriend*

What? Sounds entertaining to me.Or are you suddenly above gay jokes? No one is above gay jokes, and if you're offended WELL YOU'RE JUST A HUGE FUCKING FAGGOT :C

Anyway, five bucks to my name and a world of trouble ahead of me. at least it's not boring.

YES FOUND FIVE BUCKS TODAY. No one can trump that story. It is the best thing to happen today TO ANYONE :C
Holy shit all the entries behind this are, get this, black text on a black background. Guess what I'm not reading? This.

TIME TO CAST THE DICE

Usually I have to refresh for many minutes to find a decent mark, but today I am graced with two at the same time. WHAT TO DO IN SITUATIONS LIKE THIS!? In situations like this I leave my fate to Tyche, goddess of luck: LET'S ROLL DICE TO MAKE ARBITRARY LIFE DECISIONS!
Evens are "The Doom and the Gloom" and odds are "Zayda's Journal".
BEHOLD! "The Doom and the Gloom, is not to be found with KittyMadCow" (but comma splices are, apparently).
And glory to She who keeps me from having to think about my options.
First thing I'm debating with myself: is that a comma splice? Usually commas can only splice two independent clauses and "The Doom and the Gloom" has no predicate, but since the title of something is taken as a thought unto itself I think it should count. If it isn't a splice it's definitely not needed so she's WRONG in conclusion. Also fuck you.
Her first entry (that I observe) opens with "poetry dont read into it" which is coincidentally what I do with all poetry. Only instead of "don't read into it" I just omit "into" all together and it's more accurate.
Unless it's epic poetry, of course. Holy shit where else are you going to read about Orlando going crazy and cutting guys and horses in half with one swipe of his sword?

sat here i see my fingers bleeding holding onto the last scraps on happiness

You, too, know the agony that is the new Space Hulk box set. Seriously, whoever cut that sprue needs to be feeling ashamed of himself right now. Either that or fed to sharks. It's a cape, bro, it doesn't need to be attached in 15 places to the sprue.
Oh I'm sorry, getting off topic. Please, continue.

like the grains of sand i feel the rage and the suffering
burrowing deep into my skin
see the tears rolling down those faces
burning like the hateful words

If by "rage and suffering" you mean "MY CUNTING EXACTO KNIFE" and by "hateful words" you mean "SON OF A FUCK" then yeah, this is still Space Hulk.
Skipping a stanza:

forget that news, this world is suffering
people are dieing, we kill ourselves one by one
because we just cant stand
the terror and the suffering,
we just cant stop

>dieing
I saw a title of a song that was something-or-other "dieing" needless to say I was raging. Then I saw it was by "Brokencyde" and I chuckled to myself. Either they are the biggest hacks ever or the world's greatest trolls.
Also this could totally be about Space Hulk if it were less emo and more about PURGING XENOS. It's all there on the box: "MAN VERSUS ALIEN IN A DESPERATE BATTLE"

I question who I am so you don't know me, I am a nobody because you are everything

So speaking of cunty things that remind me of totally awesome things: anyone remember that weird disembodied voice that would respond to a sorcerer's calls in Shadow Skill?
OF COURSE YOU DON'T I'M THE ONLY ONE THAT BOUGHT SHADOW SKILL THANKS A LOT ASSHOLES NOW WE'LL NEVER GET A SEQUEL :C

ok, quck list of things to write about....
going onto the forum to find out i had abusive vm left on my wall
not being able to find pet DOB for guyguy and loggy
talking to guyguy cheered me up again a bit ahaha....

What.

wow i so am too tired to write about half of that, most of it is self explained anyways....

What.
By the by: English has a set word order you kind of have to follow if you plan on making sense. Or no, excuse me: set word order English has must you follow sense if you plan to make it.
Dipshit.

ok back to ranting about mum, for readers referance im only caling her mum her cuz of my name policy where i can help it...

Yes, her "name" policy wherein people she knows must be called something. Those words are crafty that way, they are.

anyways, all mum ever was is a source fo money,

Aww that's sweet.

• Music:Linkin Park

:3

so starting off... guy withdrawals... lol... i think anyone with half a brain cell can tell in this entry why im bummed out... not getting to talk today sucked :(

Anyone with half a brain cell would have lost it by now READING THIS SHIT :c

being my usual self I asked him why he puts up with me, and his answer was.... you're funny...

Bwaha 0_o

Funny looking, maybe.
Shit got her. Done.

I’m in one of those moods where I want to listen to the heaviest music I listen to, the answer, Rammstein…

YEAH GOTTA LISTEN TO SOME DIPSHIT GERMAN HEAVY METAL, MOTHERFUCKER. HARDCORE, SON. DAUGHTER. WHATEVER.

Wait, hold up. Asked out?!?!? Ahaha and here I was thinking no one wanted to go out with me… hehe so yea,

BACK THE FUCK UP, PILLOWBITERS. ASKED OUT? YOU BETTER FUCKING BELIEVE THAT HOT PIECE OF TAIL GOT ASKED THE FUCK OUT. SHE WAS SO ASKED OUT HER MOTHER GOT A TEXT ABOUT IT WHILE SHE WAS GIVING BIRTH TO HER.
Whenever someone tells me to HOLD UP or BACK UP I immediately start reading whatever they just wrote in the most extreme voice imaginable.

I’m sat listening to The Fray at the moment, have been for the last hour, listened to The Foo Fighters for most of the day, watched the tropical like rain come down…

Wow my brain almost grammatically exploded. "I am sat".

Just had the craziest conversation ever… why do I pick up people’s auras… well who knows, but yeah, it was interesting, not actually going to write about it at the moment, maybe later on in this entry or another day but yeah…

Here's how to properly interpret what she just wrote: "I have nothing to say so I'm going to waste more of your time by yammering on about nothing like a fucking mental patient."
All right listen to me, kittymadcow. I have never in my fucking life read someone who has written so much and yet said so little. That's a lie, actually (hi Lois Tyson, writer of my "critical theory" textbook) but it still applies to you: say what you mean and stop writing. I don't need to read through all your dipshit posturing and nonsense.
Pud.